AZ Adoption from Consent to Terminate BioDad

[Caydon's Mommy]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona

My situation is kind of different.
Basically, I met my son's biodad when we were both in our "partying" stage (I was still in high school). After two months, I got pregnant and quit everything I was doing to raise my son. Biodad continued to do drugs and party. He also started to become abusive both physically and emotionally.....
When my son was born, I did not put him on the birth certificate because he told me he'd rather party and do drugs then be with us (this whole time, I thought he quit everything but was continuing in secret...). He also wasn't there to sign.
Two years later... My ex (biodad) has legally "abandoned" my son. He hasn't seen him in over a year, never followed through on paying child support or cleaning up his act (I don't have the money for a lawyer), and hasn't called/contacted in over 6 months.
I am currently engaged to a man who my son knows as daddy (he was my best friend during the first year of my son's life) and who wants to legally adopt him. My ex is now in the marines and wants to sign off his rights. I even have a audio recording (he ok'd it) of him saying he thinks the best situation for our son is for Charles (my fiance) to adopt.
My main question is... what now?
Do I need to push myself into further debt to hire an attorney if biodad is alright with terminating?
I know another option is to wait until we are married and simply send biodad the paperwork to have him 1. sign an affidavid (sp?) and 2. sign off his rights so my fiance can adopt.
Would the court let this termination happen any earlier?
I don't want my ex to change his mind... I know my ex wouldn't have the patience or love that my son deserves and I truly fear for my son's safety.
Please let me know what to do. I try to understand the laws in AZ but it is hard!!
Thank you for taking the time to read and respond!

 

[seniorjudge]

Q: My main question is... what now?

A: Hire a lawyer to make sure this is all done correctly.

There are thousands of posts just like yours on here. Read some and educate yourself.

Good luck.

 

[Caydon's Mommy]

I've been told countless times that every case is different and it's all about the details...


I also don't have the money to hire an attorney... if I did, I would've hired one already!

 

[Caydon's Mommy]

also...
is it wise to go in front of a judge to terminate his rights without an attorney?

I'm willing to pull out a loan or whatever I can to hire an attorney. I just don't know if that is something I HAVE to do... ((I've been told that it isn't necessary))

Aren't the laws different in every state? So if I research into it and it's different for AZ then I'm out of luck...

 

[TheGeekess]

Your boyfriend/fiancé cannot adopt your son. He is not the boy's step-dad yet. Get married, wait a couple of years before you approach this subject again.

 

[Caydon's Mommy]

so should I ignore it until we are married?
What if something happens to me? Wouldn't my son then go to my ex??
Would it be better if I took my ex to court to get it all squared away with?

 

[seniorjudge]

You cannot "b*astardize" a child.

Yes, I know that term is not acceptable anymore.

Anyway, the idea is that the parental rights of a parent cannot be terminated GENERALLY until there is someone to take that parents place.

As TG said, if and when you get married, get that lawyer and do it right.

 

[jenndga]

Although it is highly frowned upon here, I am a legal do-it-yourselfer. I have hired attorneys for certain matters, but I usually try and take care of it myself first.

If you are going to try this route (because as much advice you may get here to the contrary, you may just need to do what you need to do) I have some generalized advice for you.

1. Read your states statute on the subject... over and over and over and then read it again.

2. Become friends with your clerk of court. They will not give you legal advice or answer specific questions about your case, but if you are polite, they can and will answer legal yes & no questions pertaining to the filing of your petition. Most of the time they will even have the forms you need and give them to you for free.

3. Visit your local library. They often have legal books explaining the process in layman's terms and have legal forms in them as well. Just beware of the publication dates, laws change frequently and you do not want to use an outdated reference.

4. Get a free consult with an attorney. You can usually get an hour of time with an attorney on the difficulty/ease of your case and at least know where you stand. Remember, just because you consult with an attorney does not mean you have to hire him/her.

5. Know when to throw in the towel. If it gets to be too much for you to handle, either hold off or hire an attorney to proceed. Sometimes it's just better for your sanity to let the professionals handle it for you.

Anyway, back to your predicament. According to Arizona statute - Title 8, Chapter 5, Article 2, you can file a petition to terminate the father's legal rights as a seperate matter from the adoption. If the petition is accepted, there will be a hearing. Either the dad shows up and agrees to terminate, or he can no show and the court can terminate.

Arizona Revised Statutes

Then, in the future when you are married, you can file the petition for the step-parent adoption and submit the order for termination of rights with the adoption.

Good luck to you!!!