bio-dad want to terminate rights

[ab1]

What is the name of your state? Indiana

I will be getting married in April and would very much like to adopt my fiancee's 2 yr old daughter. Bio is in Florida, is listed on bc, has had no interest, no formal visitation or cs, etc.

We filed for paternity and our atty could not reach him by mail or by phone. Apparently, he had his father call (this guy is 30 by the way, and had his dad call) our atty to say that he would like to sign over his rights. We have been advised by the atty that he can't just sign over, that we still have to go through paternity and cs hearings, file for adoption, and basically hope that he will still be willing at that time. I understand that Indiana may make us wait a year before I can adopt.

We are meeting with our atty tomorrow but I wanted to be prepared with as much info as possible. My fiancee would just as soon have him sign over all of his rights to her, so that when I can adopt it will presumably be an easier process. Plus no waiting around for him to change his mind, be vindictive, etc. I'm guesing that he got the summons, talked to a lawyer, and wants nothing to do with back support, any money going forward, and could care less about seeing the child. Any input would be greatly appreciated.

Also, if we do have to wait, does anyone have any experience on an agreement that might put a hold on cs he would owe, have a no contact clause, and a stipulation that he signs over when the time is appropriate.

Thanks,
ab1

This is a follow up to 'Stepfather:how to adopt' - last post on 11/3.
[url]http://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=285676[/url]
(thanks all for your input)

[brisgirl825]

You got accurate advice in your first thread. I am not quite clear as to what you need help with now?

[ab1]

My first thread was before we had filed anything. Before he had expressed his wish to terminate his rights. Now that he has, can he just go ahead and do this, or does he have to wait until I have filed for adoption? This is the impression we are getting from the atty but it doesn't make since to me. Independent of our marriage, my adopting the child, etc. she would want him permanently out anyway.

Thanks for your advice on the previous, I do appreciate it.

[tigger22472]

Originally Posted by ab1

My first thread was before we had filed anything. Before he had expressed his wish to terminate his rights. Now that he has, can he just go ahead and do this, or does he have to wait until I have filed for adoption? This is the impression we are getting from the atty but it doesn't make since to me. Independent of our marriage, my adopting the child, etc. she would want him permanently out anyway.

Thanks for your advice on the previous, I do appreciate it.

No, as I told you in the other thread (thanks bri, cuz I'm getting tired) it all done in one process... whether she wants him out anyway has no bearing. Indiana does not allow TPR without the adoption and it's all done at one time. You still have to go through with the home study and everything because ultimately it's still up to the judge (i.e the state) to grant.

[brisgirl825]

Ok, got it!

I do believe that IN is a state that requires an adoption and TPR to be done simultaneously.

If wants to get out of paying cs, he's not going to change his mind. What has been done thus far? Has a cs order been issued?

[ab1]

We have filed for paternity, hearing date is December. CS has not been started yet. We were told paternity had to be established first (there is no question on paternity), then cs, then we get married, then I can file for adoption, then he can give up his rights.

Adoption, and my involvement aside, can he just give up his rights now? I believe Tigger was saying this is not possible unless there is a petition for adoption in place(which I will be filing asap).

I hope I'm not being repetitive, frankly, I'm just confused and this issue is the most important thing I have ever gone through.

Is TPR always dependent on a forthcoming adoption process. Does the adoption just have to be filed for, or does it have to be completed?

[tigger22472]

Originally Posted by ab1

We have filed for paternity, hearing date is December. CS has not been started yet. We were told paternity had to be established first (there is no question on paternity), then cs, then we get married, then I can file for adoption, then he can give up his rights.

Adoption, and my involvement aside, can he just give up his rights now? I believe Tigger was saying this is not possible unless there is a petition for adoption in place(which I will be filing asap).

I hope I'm not being repetitive, frankly, I'm just confused and this issue is the most important thing I have ever gone through.

Is TPR always dependent on a forthcoming adoption process. Does the adoption just have to be filed for, or does it have to be completed?

Listen carefully....
In Indiana....
He cannot give up his rights without someone willing to adopt
the adoption must be filed with the courts before anything else is done
it is all one process (the adoption and TPR)

[ab1]

Thanks Tigger. I get it. Your advice has been extremely helpful to me.

I was simply answering Bri's question...
"What has been done thus far? Has a cs order been issued?"

[brisgirl825]

Originally Posted by ab1

We have filed for paternity, hearing date is December. CS has not been started yet. We were told paternity had to be established first (there is no question on paternity), then cs, then we get married, then I can file for adoption, then he can give up his rights.

Ok, I just wanted to make sure that mom was not going to drop the cs case. She needs to keep going forward with that.

[ab1]

Thanks Bri! Sounds like we are on the right track. Just wanting some second opinions, never hurt. You and Tigger are a great resouce...as always.

[brisgirl825]

Originally Posted by ab1

Thanks Bri! Sounds like we are on the right track. Just wanting some second opinions, never hurt. You and Tigger are a great resouce...as always.

Glad to help. I was just through this myself and I know that it is scary and stressful.

Please keep us updated!