contested relative adoption

[sanben]

What is the name of your state? ARK

We are trying to adopt our niece. We have had custody for 3 years (she's 4). She went into foster care when bmom was arrested. DCFS closed their case when we were granted custody. Bdad is hubby's brother. Both bio parents are drug addicts with numerous arrests. Both are currently incarcerated. Visits were very sparse before they went to jail. We do have an attorney but he's not sure about the answers to these two questions. (He says it's up to the judge.) We just wanted more opinions. Here goes:
1) Neither has ever paid a dime of child support because there is no court order. We both work, so we never needed or asked for it. Will it be grounds for termination that they haven't paid if we never asked for it in the first place?
2) Bmom has asked for an attorney because she's indigent. Will she be appointed one since DCFS is not involved? If not, what happens next? Looks like all sorts of grounds for her to appeal it later.
Any advice/opinions would be appreciated. Thanks!

[brisgirl825]

If your grounds for TRP is abdonment, then the lack of a CO could be a problem. However, a lot of states allow for a TPR based on felony convictions of bio-parents. You should google AR laws and/or discuss that avenue with your atty.

I am not familiar with a family court granting a public defender. TRP, might be different though.

[sanben]

Thanks for your reply! We're not sure what to expect. I've been researching online and I can't find much about whether she will be granted an attorney. Because of the trouble we can see down the line, we hope they will, though. Nice and clean and legal is our aim here.

ARK is an 'or' state, so it could be abandonment or non-support for 12 months. It doesn't mention whether the court order has to be in place first. That's where our confusion comes in. We are in much better financial shape (not that it matters as far as her best interests, i know) than either of them. It seemed ridiculous for us to even ask, so we never did. I really hope we didn't goof by leaving that un-done. Basically, they weren't too interested in her until they learned that we wanted to adopt. Also, neither of them could support her once they are released. They have always lived with relatives - even when they are working. Neither has ever lived on their own - she's 28, he's 41. She is the only child for both. They don't have any sort of plan for her future. They are fighting us now because they want things to stay exactly as they are- they can visit whenever they want but they aren't responsible for anything. It will be an open adoption, naturally, too. Bdad is a blood relative. Bmom is his girlfriend. We are just looking for some permanency for our little girl.

[mom2J]

sanben, please pm me. I think I may be able to help with some resources and support.

Mom2J

[brisgirl825]

Originally Posted by sanben

Thanks for your reply! We're not sure what to expect. I've been researching online and I can't find much about whether she will be granted an attorney. Because of the trouble we can see down the line, we hope they will, though. Nice and clean and legal is our aim here.

ARK is an 'or' state, so it could be abandonment or non-support for 12 months. It doesn't mention whether the court order has to be in place first. That's where our confusion comes in. We are in much better financial shape (not that it matters as far as her best interests, i know) than either of them. It seemed ridiculous for us to even ask, so we never did. I really hope we didn't goof by leaving that un-done. Basically, they weren't too interested in her until they learned that we wanted to adopt. Also, neither of them could support her once they are released. They have always lived with relatives - even when they are working. Neither has ever lived on their own - she's 28, he's 41. She is the only child for both. They don't have any sort of plan for her future. They are fighting us now because they want things to stay exactly as they are- they can visit whenever they want but they aren't responsible for anything. It will be an open adoption, naturally, too. Bdad is a blood relative. Bmom is his girlfriend. We are just looking for some permanency for our little girl.

The best thing to do, is to ask them to tpr for an OPEN adoption. I'm sure that they'll be all for it. They can see the child and not have to worry about support.
I bet you can talk with them about the benefits on their part and things will be ok. Then you won't have to worry about not having a CO for cs and how that may impact your case.

Anyway, just a thought. GL.

[Zephyr]

I agree with bris- if you make it clear that nothing is really changing except the legalities they may grant the adoption, (this is provided that you may be open to allowing an occasional visit) they didn't visit much before and now they are in the clink (and likely to return at some point) they may go for the adoption, especially if that absolves them of any and all future support requests. after the adoption you and hubby can allow or not allow the visitation as you think they affect the child.

but I certainly would ask them first, they have got to know that they will never be able to provide the lifestyle for the child that you do.

[sanben]

Thanks for the replies! I agree that would be a positive way to resolve this problem and it would work very well if we were dealing with sensible people, but**************. We've spoken to them both already and explained it would just be 'on paper', that we want to protect her future. When we pointed out to bdad that if one of us became disabled or died, Nic couldn't draw anything and we would really be struggling, he pointed out that she could draw off HIM if anything happened to him, too. This from a man who has earned less than $10,000 in the last TEN years! He's obviously not too worried about her future. Oh well, we're hanging in there!!

[skyspirit]

My situation is about the same. Mom is my cuz by marriage (but not anymore). Bio ma and dad are in and out of jail. I have legal custody of 2 of their 4 children. I've had the boys for 3 years. Bio ma hasn't seen them in over a year. Bio dad hasn't seen them in almost 3 years. There is a support order, but neither has ever paid. They are permitted to visit at a supervised visitation center, but they haven't used it.

I am looking for resources as well to adopt the boys. We live in Summit County, Ohio. Anyone know who can help us?

Thanks.

Sorry---didn't mean to hijack your thread, but it sounds so similar to my case that I couldn't help myself!

[mom2J]

Skyspirit, I've sent you a pm. Mom2J