Do we need TPR if birth father is not on birth cert?

[SeriousSam]

State: MISSOURI

I am engaged to the mother of a two year old and we are planning for me to adopt the child as soon as possible. The father is not on the birth certificate, has had no contact with the mother since the child was 3 months old, and has paid no child support. In order to have legal parental rights he would have to request a paternity test. Can we do the adoption without involving him or do we still have to get some kind of a release from him? Can we start adoption proceedings before we are married?

-SeriousSam

 

[Silverplum]

State: MISSOURI
I am engaged to the mother of a two year old and we are planning for me to adopt the child as soon as possible. The father is not on the birth certificate, has had no contact with the mother since the child was 3 months old, and has paid no child support. In order to have legal parental rights he would have to request a paternity test. Can we do the adoption without involving him or do we still have to get some kind of a release from him? Can we start adoption proceedings before we are married?

If you did a simple search of the adoption portion of this law forum alone, you would know that NO IT IS NOT POSSIBLE to do what you want.

 

[moburkes]

What a way to start a marriage. FRAUD. Oh, how happy you will both be in jail, with someone else taking care of the baby.

By the way, the father is not required by any law in any state to pay child support for a child that is not legally his. He would be stupid to do it anyway.

 

[SeriousSam]

free advice

Guess you get what you pay for on a "free advice" forum. I should have known.

How easy it is to be a jerk when you can't see the person on the other side of the computer.

Thanks!

 

[Ozark_Sophist]

First, the legal father of the child has to be determined. Since the mother is aware of the father, paternity must be established through the court. You two lovebirds get married. Then legal father can give up the child so you can adopt. More or less.

 

[Silverplum]

Wow, and to think: IF you had followed the instructions in the TOS of this site, you could have done a simple search, gotten your (utterly obvious) answer, and been on your way in 10 minutes with no hassles.

Instead, you posted a truly useless post. Got your (utterly obvious) answer/s. And now you are complaining.

Golly gee, mister. We volunteers sure are sorry we disappointed you and didn't make up brand-new laws to suit you and your musical-daddy girlfriend.

Wow, what credentials. A lawyer by day, dog groomer by night; or is it the other way around.

Guess you get what you pay for on a "free advice" forum. I should have known.

How easy it is to be a jerk when you can't see the person on the other side of the computer.

Thanks!

 

[moburkes]

Silver - be nice to the guests.

 

[Ozark_Sophist]

Ot

Wow, and to think: IF you had followed the instructions in the TOS of this site, you could have done a simple search, gotten your (utterly obvious) answer, and been on your way in 10 minutes with no hassles.

WHERE are the TOS? I find the Terms and Conditions, but THERE IS NOTHING in the T and C about doing a simple search first before posting. NOR does the FAQ state anything about searching the forum before starting a thread.

 

[Ozark_Sophist]

Wow, and to think: IF you had followed the instructions in the TOS of this site, you could have done a simple search, gotten your (utterly obvious) answer, and been on your way in 10 minutes with no hassles.

Instead, you posted a truly useless post. Got your (utterly obvious) answer/s. And now you are complaining.

Golly gee, mister. We volunteers sure are sorry we disappointed you and didn't make up brand-new laws to suit you and your musical-daddy girlfriend.

However, the T and C do prohibit harrassing and rude posts like yours.

 

[momofrose]

State: MISSOURI

I am engaged to the mother of a two year old and we are planning for me to adopt the child as soon as possible. The father is not on the birth certificate, has had no contact with the mother since the child was 3 months old, and has paid no child support. In order to have legal parental rights he would have to request a paternity test. Can we do the adoption without involving him or do we still have to get some kind of a release from him? Can we start adoption proceedings before we are married?

-SeriousSam

Not sure what is going on here, but
a) If the father is not on the birth certificate and has no orders to pay child support - he does not (by law) have to do so - your girlfriend dropped the ball on that one.
b) Just because he is not on the birth certificate does not mean you can pretend he does not exist - he must voluntarily reliquish his parental rights in order for you to adopt
c) You are only engaged...you must be marriued for at least 2 years (to show stability) in order to adopt - so you are jumping the gun a bit.

 

[SeriousSam]

Thank You Momofrose

An actual answer to the question! Thank you Momofrose. Yes I suppose in that light I would be jumping the gun a bit. One thing I can tell you is that I came on here knowing absolutely nothing about adoption. I didnt see any requirements abotu reading FAQs, I stupidly thought it would be ok just to post a question and learn from the answer. I didnt know if parental rights needed to be terminated if the guy doesnt have legal rights to begin with. We were thinking about trying to do one of those self service adoption services, but I didnt know where to get started, and I thought someone could at least tell me if I would have to have an attorney right off the bat.

To answer your question about what is going on here, I'm a guy who knows computer networking, and dearly loves his fiance and the 2 year old little girl that we get the pleasure of raising together. Thats pretty much all there is to me. So here i come to ask a question on a forum to get a moment of direction, and I get flamed by two really rude wanna-be attorneys. It makes me angry that people have to be that way. However, sometimes people like that flame the wrong person and things get ugly.

 

[mommyof4]

An actual answer to the question! Thank you Momofrose. Yes I suppose in that light I would be jumping the gun a bit. One thing I can tell you is that I came on here knowing absolutely nothing about adoption. I didnt see any requirements abotu reading FAQs, I stupidly thought it would be ok just to post a question and learn from the answer. I didnt know if parental rights needed to be terminated if the guy doesnt have legal rights to begin with. We were thinking about trying to do one of those self service adoption services, but I didnt know where to get started, and I thought someone could at least tell me if I would have to have an attorney right off the bat.

When the time comes (which is not now, as momofrose stated), you do not want to attempt TPR/adoption without an atty.

To answer your question about what is going on here, I'm a guy who knows computer networking, and dearly loves his fiance and the 2 year old little girl that we get the pleasure of raising together. Thats pretty much all there is to me. So here i come to ask a question on a forum to get a moment of direction, and I get flamed by two really rude wanna-be attorneys. It makes me angry that people have to be that way. However, sometimes people like that flame the wrong person and things get ugly.

Please stop making threats (whether they be implict or explicit) to members.

 

[SeriousSam]

Mommyof4

Please stop making threats (whether they be implict or explicit) to members.

There are no threats, implicit nor explicit.

 

[Just Blue]

If you have an issue with a post, you report it. You do not threaten members of this forum. Period! Your reaction to their posts is absurd!

BTW: You may not have liked the way they phrased it but BOTH Mo and Silver were correct in the answers they gave. You were proposing fraud in your initial post, and the first two posts by Silver and Mo were not flaming. However your insulting second post WAS!

 

[SeriousSam]

Forum Admins

Forum admins have deleted my very informative post about what I have learned about the two rude members. I have no plans to do anything illegal, but it may behoove your members to know that being rude to people is wrong, whether you believe you are anonymously hidden behind the screen of the internet or not. I wasn't looking for a specific answer to my original question, only for information to tell me what my first step should be. There are nice ways to say things such as, "Hey here is where you can learn more about your question <insert FAQ link here>". I wouldnt have minded that at all. But your members directly insulted my fiance with their musical daddies comment, and I wont sit by and take that when I have the ability to not have to. If you are going to edit my posts, then perhaps you should take a look at MOST of theirs. Isn't it yoru job to be sure people arent violating the ToS? You dropped the ball on those two! Have a nice day! Thanks to the members who actually provided information. I just didnt want to contact an attorney to see if I needed to hire an attorney. Everyone knows how an attorney will answer that question.