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Family wanting to adopt out child--how to proceed

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patpat

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

A little background:
I just completed the process of becoming a foster parent with the goal of adopting a child or children. A friend put me in contact with a family that is wanting to adopt out the little boy they have been raising. The biomom and dad are both incarcerated. The mother released parental rights to the bio father before he was incarcerated. The paternal grandmother and her 17 yo daughter have been caring for this boy since father's incarceration. They have decided that the arrangment is no longer working for them. The bio father said if you can find a good home go ahead...Other family members have no interest in raising the boy. They were on the verge of calling CPS to pick up the child when a mutal friend called me.

I am assuming there is a legal way to adopt this child without subjecting him to the foster care system. Do I contact CPS or a lawyer? What steps need to happen? I've met the child and I think it imperative to get him in a stable situation with some structure and security. Thanks in advance.
 


momofrose

Senior Member
First the term is "place a child" - not "adopt out". I am surprised that they did not teach you that during your foster training. It is incredibly important to use words that do not harm the child.

Are you 100% certain that the mom had her rights terminated? Have you seen the court order of parental termination?

Have you passed a home study for adoptin? (I am not sure it is the same for foster care)?

If all of the above are in order - you should contact an adoption attorney. However the parents and/or legal guardian of this little boy should also have a lawyer, so you may have to pay for that as well.

Good luck
 

Farfalla

Member
First the term is "place a child" - not "adopt out". I am surprised that they did not teach you that during your foster training. It is incredibly important to use words that do not harm the child.

Are you 100% certain that the mom had her rights terminated? Have you seen the court order of parental termination?

Have you passed a home study for adoptin? (I am not sure it is the same for foster care)?
Just to clarify a bit more on what momofrose stated…

With both parties having attorneys… the attorneys will make sure that the rights of both parents are terminated. Though you can clear up whether or not the mother has actually done this already by asking to see the paperwork. The adoption attorney will also do things like order the home study, background checks, etc. They know who to call and who does these things.

Another route you could take is to contact an adoption agency and have them handle it as they have the entire process in place already. The one stipulation you would need to make is that this child is to be placed with you. We went through Catholic Social Services, they are wonderful. They not only took care of the paperwork, foster care for our son before we brought him home, etc… but they also provided a lot of help to our son’s birth mother.

One thing I’d like to mention about this type of adoption you are contemplating… we tried one like this one before we adopted our son. It went on for a few months and I got so caught up in it. In the end the birth mother decided not to go through with it. This is non-uncommon. So if you try this… keep from getting to emotionally drawn into the process until both parents have signed away their rights.
 

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