finding father's birth family

[mizharstar]

What is the name of your state? Colorado

How can I find my father's birth family? He was born in Colorado in 1940. He was adopted as an infant. We have his birth mother's name and know that she died sometime in the late 1950's or early 60's. Do not have a name for birth father.

I have always wanted to know who my father's birth family was, if we had cousins, etc. I also wanted info for medical records purposes (birth mother died of breast cancer). My adoptive grandmother said she would tell me what she knew (about his birth parents) when she felt I was old enough. My adoptive grandparents died together in a car accident in 1987 taking all the info with them.

Until now, my father had refused to discuss his birth parents or the adoption. Recently he has said that he would sign something if that is what I need to start trying to find his birth family, but that he didn't want to be active in the search himself.

With just a birth mother's name, where would I start to find my relatives? Who do I need to contact? Do I need an attorney, or can I go about this myself? What would my father have to sign to grant or allow access to information on his behalf?

 

[snshea]

Do you know the location in Colorado where the birth mother lived at the time of your fathers birth?

 

[mizharstar]

My father was adopted shortly (if not immediatley) after he was born from what I was told. My adoptive grandparents lived in Arvada. My dad told me that his birth mother was living in Denver at the time of her death.

Arvada was very very small at the time my dad was born. I would guess she lived in Arvada or Denver at the time.

 

[mizharstar]

forgot to add

I was told once that trying to find anything using a private detective was fruitless as there are legal matters involved. I don't know if that was true or not.

I am hoping that since my father approves and the fact that his birth mother and adoptive parents have all passed on, that might make a difference in whether records would be accessible.

 

[mizharstar]

I inquired with a few private detectives I found in the phone book. All either said that they thought the info should be available to us anyway (where?), or that if they were able to find anything, they probably woudn't be able to disclose it to us anyway because of the legal issues surounding adoption.

Is this information something that should be available if someone knows just where to look for it? Obviously I don't know where to look or I would already have what I am seeking. So I am no further in this search.

If I need an attorney for this, what sort of attorney, just one who handles adoption?

Any help and suggestions would be really appreciated.

 

[fairisfair]

Start by searching for her (dad's bio mom) family members, maybe you will find one who is willing to give you more information. Use geneology sites and people search sites, but don't go paying the fees, that is just a rip off and you get old info that is useless. Try posting on family web sites of people with the same name, you never know. I was looking for someone once and used peoplesite.com, I met a few people online that had access to all kinds of internet tools and they helped me find who I was looking for. you might try posting there.

 

[snshea]

I would agree w/ fairisfair - If you know where she was located at the time of death you could check public records & try to find a death certificate. By narrowing down or pinpointing the date of her death you could search obituaries & maybe find the names of surviving relatives. A few names, a telephone, & internet could lead you along ways without involving an attorney or violating any adoption laws.

 

[mizharstar]

Good suggestions I will try. I did try ancestry.com and another geneology website and found nothing. Also, being close to Denver, I tried the Denver Public Library's geneology department and found nothing there either. I will try the one you suggested.

Can I obtain the death certificate myself as the granddaughter, or would my dad have to do this since he was her son? Would I need a paper trail going from me to my dad (my birth certificate) then his birth certificate (I would have to get one, as he says he doesn't even have a copy) to show a relationship, or are death records open for anyone to get?

 

[snshea]

Here's a site to try -

http://www.privateeye.com/?from=p30668&vw=Death&Input=&piid=42

I've never used it but maybe it can get you started.

 

[snshea]

Here's a CO site that should help -

http://www.cdphe.state.co.us/hs/birth.html

 

[nextwife]

I hate to burst your bubble, hon, but very likely there was never any establishment of paternity. Adoptive fathers back in the 40's were NOT necessarilly named if there was a pregnancy outside marriage. And there was no such thiung as DNA testing, so establishment of paternity was not so easwy to do.

Adoption was legally allowable if only Mom signed off, biodad's in many states did not need to outside marriage. An unwed girl "in the family way" handled an adoption covertly, often being sent away for the duration of the pregnancy and returning after the newborn adoption. It is entirely possible that no written record exists that names the father. FYI- My daughter's father was never established legally either. In her birth country, Mom was able to place her for adoption and leave the birth certificate as "father unknown". Her bioMom alone knows who might be biodad. This is pretty much the same as the way it was done here in the US in the 40s. More than likely, there is nothing written that states who biodad may be. And iyt is likely NOT on the birth certificate IF this was an unmarried biomom.

 

[mizharstar]

I guess I had always assumed the father's name would be on the birth certificate. Too bad my dad's birthmom would have been able to omit this priceless information for what, pride's sake?

My mom suggested that I go to high schools that were around in that time and look through yearbooks for a guy that looked like my dad did. I always thought that would be a waste of time (and do high schools keep copies of their old yearbooks on hand for 60+years?). Maybe that is one of my only options at this point.

 

[nextwife]

I guess I had always assumed the father's name would be on the birth certificate. Too bad my dad's birthmom would have been able to omit this priceless information for what, pride's sake?(

Gosh, no. Even today, there are many people who don't have a father listed on the birth certificate. My daughter's original birth certificate never had a father named, for example. Biomom never established who biodad was.

One can't simply PUT someone else on a birth certificate, if unmarried! They either had to SIGN a birth certificate or Acknowledgment of Paternity (which means they needed to be around when the bitrth occurs or afte, AND willing to sign and accept paternity) or be legally determined by the court system to be the father. IT's not a matter of "ommitting" it is a matter of there now BEING a person who WAS legally the father. Mom MAY have "known" who dad was, but that alone doesn't lLLEGALLY ESTABLISH that the party IS the father, thus SHE couldn't have simply elected to name him. I can't just SAY that "X" is the dad and put him on the BC. Imagine how many women would simply list, say, Bill Gates, as dad, if THEY could just tell who they wanted on the BC and be legally entitled to name them WITHOUT any proof.

 

[Confusedtoo]

Bio moms name?

Do you have her birth name or marraige name (last name)? Either one is very helpful.

Here are some website to use:

www.*******s.org/activism/access.htm
www.Zabasearch.com
www.PublicData.com ($10 a month but worth it!)

Search for birth/death index in Co. Contact ISRR and register (International Soundex Reunion Registry)

If you PM me I may be able to help you a lot more. I'm an adoptee and have a few tricks up my sleeve along w/many people in the same situation..... we do help each other!

Good Luck and remember finding information does not happen overnight... it's a long process.

 

[CMSC]

I too am an adoptee who has searched and succesfully found my birth mother, birth father and several other family members. I've also reunited quite a few adoptee's with their families as well so if you need help just PM me. Don't worry, I'm free!LOL

If you have the birth mothers name you can get her information from the SSDI, also you may want to search here, http://www.familysearch.org/, it has a ton of information. I also have an ancestry.com membership if you need any records don't pay for them on there, just let me know and I can email them to you.

One thing I do want to say, please do not procede in contacting your dad's family without his permission, it is opening a can of worms and if his biological family did not know about him it can cause alot of heartache when going in unprepared . If you want medical information try to have him obtain all of his information from the state first (many times bmom's were required to fill out a medical info sheet prior to adoption).