husband's rights

[flora717]

What is the name of your state? new york. after reading different questions and answers in the advice forum, i am under the impression that if contact is not made or support paid within a certain amount of time, a parent loses their parental rights? my son's biological father has not contacted him by phone or in person for approx. 1 1/2 years although he lives less than 1 mile away. child support has not been paid in 8 months. he sees my son's siblings often at a neighborhood store ( NOT HIS CHILDREN) but never asks about my son. someone please assist me with a little new york adoption law.

 

[tigger22472]

Firstly no contact and no support does not automatically constitute the lose of parental rights. Only a judge can do that. What that means is that if you have a visitation order that gives bio-father visitation and he shows up out of the blue on say what would be his weekend or for a better example on a Wed. if that is his day and you refuse visitation then technically you are in contempt of court and he could file. Is it fair? That's for you to decide but that is the law. In most states they require someone, most of the time a step-parent, that is willing to step in and adopt the child before TPR can be done.

 

[flora717]

husbands rightds

so, what your telling me is that my husband, who i married while i was pregnant with this child, can adopt my son without his bio-fathers permission?

 

[tigger22472]

WAIT hold up...
You were married before the child was born? In some states that automatically makes your husband the father of the child if not biologically.. you need to check the laws in your state. Hopefully an attorney will be here soon.

 

[stephenk]

Tigger, the presumption is if the mother gets pregnant while married the husband is the father even if another man claims he is the father of the child.

the poster's tone is that she was pregnant before she got married and then gave birth while married.

 

[flora717]

maybe i need to tell my story more clearly. i had three children with the man to whom i am still married. while briefly separated from this man i got pregnant by another man. my now husband and i reconciled and married in a mosque while i was pregnant with this other man's child. this other man paid no support to this child until he was court ordered and later his pay was garnisheed. this man had little contact with my son who is now ten. when this child was still an infant, this man went to court for visitation and used the address of a empty house across the street from me as my address, therefore, i never knew he even went to court for visitation because i was never served. he was given by the court , every other weekend 3-8pm sat. through sunday. and all christian holidays. he has never taken advantage of this award and saw my son approx. 10 times at very brief intervals over the past ten years. he has not made any contact with my son in approx one and one half years and has not paid support(cseb claims he no longer works) since april. how does my husband adopt this child, or does he even need to have this other man's right terminated because we were married in a mosque while i was pregnant. no paternity test was ever required by court and this other man did say he was the father when asked by the judge at the support hearing about 9 years ago. he lives less than 1 mile from us and we see him driving around or in a store occassionally and he does not even inquire about my son or even acknowledges us when he sees us.

 

[coosi]

paid no support to this child until he was court ordered "

If he was court ordered to pay child support then he was determined to be the father. He is the father. Unless he agrees to terminate his rights, your husband cannot adopt him.

The time to have thought of this, was before you decided to make this man pay child support. If you hadn't done that, your husband would have legally been the father...

 

[flora717]

i never requested that the bio father pay child support, dept of social services did that.

 

[coosi]

How did Social Services know he was the father?

 

[flora717]

social services knew he was the father because i was on social services at the time and had to name him as the father of my unborn child. i am not denying that he is the bio father i am trying to find out nys law regarding non payment of support and no contact affecting my husband' s ability to adopt my son easily. the bio father at one time asked my decision on whether i would allow him to form a relationship with my son or not. out of fairness to my son, i gave this man the opportunity and he made a feeble attempt (approx 3 visits of 1 hour each) and has not seen him again in almost two years. yes i could have lied and said my husband was the father but, i would have to live with this lie. also, i would like to know how a visitation order can be in effect if it was filed without my knowlege using a false address.

 

[coosi]

http://www.calib.com/nccanch/statutes/statutes/tblTermin_search.cfm

New York
Statute: Soc. Serv. Law §§ 384-b; 358-a(3)(b) Full text
Circumstances That Are Grounds for Termination
Abandonment or Extreme Parental Disinterest

Abuse/Neglect

Mental Illness or Deficiency

Alcohol or Drug Induced Incapacity

Felony Conviction/Incarceration

Failure of Reasonable Efforts

Abuse/Neglect or Loss of Rights of Another Child

Failure to Maintain Contact

Failure to Provide Support

Child Judged in Need of Services/Dependent

Child's Best Interest

Child in care 15 of 22 months (or less)

Felony assault of child or sibling

Murder/Manslaughter of sibling child

For more specifics, go to the site and search under New York, there are links...