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I need my baby back

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nemoz101

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New Jersey

Hi everyone. I am 20 years old and my girlfriend is 17 years old. Me and her did a mistake and I got her pregnant. anyway. Our culture doesn't allow us to have a baby unless we are married. So our church priest decided that we need to give the baby for adoption. We were very upset we refused couple of time but we ended up doing it because we were pressured alot from her parents, My parents and the priest. Anyway. they made us talk with an adoption agency. After the baby arrived we went to the adoption agency and they found us a couple that would take the baby. The couples agreed they will let us see her every 6 month that's in writing. They verbally agreed we will have unlimited email communication. So we gave them the baby. The adoption agency made us sign a paper waiving our rights to appear in court on the finalization date and a paper giving up the baby. BTW. My girlfriend was 16 when she signed the papers.(her parents wasn't there and they didn't at all. They only came once to see the couples but they never signed anything. And they weren't there when my girlfriend signed the papers.) 2 days after we signed these papers my girlfriend decided to go get the baby back. She went to the agency and told them that she changed her mind. The agency told her that its done you cant have her back.(this was 48 hours after we signed the papers) My girlfriend went to the police and made a report. after she made the report she called her parents and they of course told her to come back to the house and stop all this. Anyway she just made the report about what happened that day. (We have a copy of the report) and she just went home. Our priest talked to us about it again and he convinced us that it would be better if the baby is with these couple.

6 month after the couples went to court and they finalized everything. They also closed down their email and gave a letter to the adoption agency to give to us. That letter says that they don't want any communication. They said they only want that once every 6 month meeting and that's it. We tried contacting the agency to tell them we cant do this we need to know how is our baby and everything. And they said they cant help us!!!.

Now every time we call the agency the secretary wont even let us talk to any of the agency representatives!

Its driving us crazy now that we have no idea where the baby is. and the agency wont do anything. I tried going there and they said they cant help me it wasn't on the agreement paper that we can communicate with the couples!!

Now what do I do???:mad::mad::mad:

BTW. me and my girlfriend never received any counseling from the agency. and the first person that took our information and introduced the couples to us was a volunteer.

Any chance of getting my baby back?
 


Antigone*

Senior Member
I'm sorry Nemoz, but the baby is not YOURS.

Get on with your life. You are young and have a lot to live for. Know that the baby you helped to breathe life into has a mother and a father who will love him/her all the days of his/her lives.
 

nemoz101

Junior Member
???????? NO WAY!!!! YOU DONT FEEL WHAT I FEEL.

That baby is mine!.

How can I trust them when they broke the agreement!! and i dont know where they are!!!!

The agency lied to us when they said we cant get the baby back. From information I know now is that I had upto 72 hours to get my baby back. isnt that true!!
 
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Gracie3787

Senior Member
???????? NO WAY!!!! YOU DONT FEEL WHAT I FEEL.

That baby is mine!.

How can I trust them when they broke the agreement!! and i dont know where they are!!!!

The agency lied to us when they said we cant get the baby back. From information I know now is that I had upto 72 hours to get my baby back. isnt that true!!
Unfortunately, the law is the law, no matter how you may feel about it. Even if you did have 72 hours in which to back out, you have gone way over that time limit.

Since you are obviously having a hard time accepting reality, you might want to think about getting a consult with a local adoption attorney. Maybe hearing the legal realities from a local attorney will help you deal with the emotional problems the adoption has caused. You might also want to consider getting counseling, outside of your church, just to help you come to terms with the realities.
 

>Charlotte<

Lurker
The couples agreed they will let us see her every 6 month that's in writing. They verbally agreed we will have unlimited email communication.
2 days after we signed these papers my girlfriend decided to go get the baby back. She went to the agency and told them that she changed her mind. The agency told her that its done you cant have her back.(this was 48 hours after we signed the papers) My girlfriend went to the police and made a report.
6 month after the couples went to court and they finalized everything. They also closed down their email and gave a letter to the adoption agency to give to us. That letter says that they don't want any communication. They said they only want that once every 6 month meeting and that's it.
To repeat what has already been said, she is not your baby. She has been adopted. Your unwillingness to accept it will not change the facts.

You are fortunate that the child's parents agreed to let you have any contact at all. After your girlfriend changed her mind, made a scene with the agency, and (worst of all) went to the police, you can hardly blame the parents for reneging on part of that agreement. They have every reason in the world to not trust your girlfriend or you.

Accept the fact that they are the baby's parents, accept whatever contact they are willing to let you have, and work toward respecting their position and regaining their trust. Those are the only options you have.
 

momofrose

Senior Member
???????? NO WAY!!!! YOU DONT FEEL WHAT I FEEL.

That baby is mine!.

How can I trust them when they broke the agreement!! and i dont know where they are!!!!

The agency lied to us when they said we cant get the baby back. From information I know now is that I had upto 72 hours to get my baby back. isnt that true!!
Just exactly what did the Agency lie to you about? Given the information your relayed, the adoption is final and the baby is now the child of the adoptive parents - there was no coercian and now deception...

rest easy knowing you did the right thing and now this child has to mature and loving adults as their parents.
 

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