Regretful birthmom in Need

[buffy_t]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? New Jersey
I am a birthmom who relinquished a child approx 30 days ago. I was under extreme duress at the the time I signed the papers(while still at HOSPITAL AND STILL MEDICATED) and had only made the decision for the adoption 10 days before delivery and relinquishment. I feel I was not properly counseled by the agency. No one knew I was pregnant (not my family and not the birthfather) and I had no input or support on the last minute decision during this extreme crisis stage. I feel used and misled as I am now only just coming to some sort of awareness. IS THERE ANY CHANCE FOR REVOCATION?

[Zephyr]

you definitely need a lawyer, I do think there is a window in which the birth mother can change her mind but you need a lawyer.

also I know you must be hurting terribly right now but you did think adoption was the best thing for your child a little over a month ago, maybe it still is maybe it isn't, you might want to seek out some sort of support group in your area that deals with adoption issues, and inform your family of what is going on, you need all the support available right now, no matter which way this goes

[momofrose]

Here is the info you are looking for -

Q. When may a birth parents rights be terminated in an agency adoption?
A. The birth parents rights may be terminated by a New Jersey agency 72 hours after the child is born. Once the birth parents sign the proper relinquishment form after having received the appropriate counseling, the termination is effective and is only subject to being set aside if fraud or duress on the part of the agency can be established

On another (more personal) note - Please re-think this natter - I TOTALLY understand what you are going through, but the fact is that you did make this decision and the child has been with his parents now for over 30 days as thei child.

Please get some counseling so that you may move forward as best you can. Hopefully you have an open adoption agreement that will allow you to get pictures and letters and possibly even visits with the child.

I wish you the VERY best

Denise

[LdiJ]

I think we are overlooking something important here. She said that she never told the father that she was pregnant. That means that he couldn't have consented to the adoption. That definitely shows some potential fraud on the part of the adoption agency.

[momofrose]

You are right - I missed that - I would imagine though that the birthmother stated that the birthfather could not be found or really can not be found.

Maybe we need to hear from the o/p for more specifics/

Denise