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Step parent adopting with child support

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diana_smith12

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? MD

My husband would like to adopt my son. His bio father lives in WA, pays regular child support, but has never pressed visitation. What are the steps that we need to do? How long do we need to be married before we can apply? I have my ex's current address and contact information throught DCSE. Thanks.
 


BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
diana_smith12 said:
What is the name of your state? MD

My husband would like to adopt my son. His bio father lives in WA, pays regular child support, but has never pressed visitation. What are the steps that we need to do? How long do we need to be married before we can apply? I have my ex's current address and contact information throught DCSE. Thanks.
Tell your husband to forget it.
 

tigger22472

Senior Member
diana_smith12 said:
What is the name of your state? MD

My husband would like to adopt my son. His bio father lives in WA, pays regular child support, but has never pressed visitation. What are the steps that we need to do? How long do we need to be married before we can apply? I have my ex's current address and contact information throught DCSE. Thanks.

Since Dad does pay support it's likely that it won't be done without his permission.
 

diana_smith12

Junior Member
My ex has no contact with me what so ever. We have only seen each other one time when my son was three months old. After seeing our son and acknowleging him as his own, he later denied paternity when I applied for child support. I was a domestic violence victim, (from my ex) and he wasn't able to contact me for a while, but the no-contact order has expired. Since then, he has made no attempt to contact me or my son, but he does have my contact info. I am fully aware that we will need my ex to waive his rights, but how to we start this? What forms do I need to file? Since I live in MD and my ex lives in WA, which state do we file with?

BelizeBreeze, why would you say that? Do you think that is helpful advice? I was only asking for legal advise, I thought that was the point of this forum.

Thanks.
 

listed3

Junior Member
You probably should get a lawyer if you can. If that's impossible, you can try googling "maryland stepparent adoption" or something like that to see if you can find your state's forms and laws. If biodad is willing to waive (which he apparently should be, since he's just paying and has no contact), it shouldn't be too hard.

It may be possible even if biodad doesn't waive. Laws of states vary. In some states, "abandonment" can be proved EITHER by no child support OR no contact.
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
listed3 said:
You probably should get a lawyer if you can. If that's impossible, you can try googling "maryland stepparent adoption" or something like that to see if you can find your state's forms and laws. If biodad is willing to waive (which he apparently should be, since he's just paying and has no contact), it shouldn't be too hard.
A hell of a lot of WRONG assumptions.
It may be possible even if biodad doesn't waive. Laws of states vary. In some states, "abandonment" can be proved EITHER by no child support OR no contact.
And in this state child support equates to "Contact". :rolleyes:
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
diana_smith12 said:
BelizeBreeze, why would you say that? Do you think that is helpful advice? I was only asking for legal advise, I thought that was the point of this forum.

Thanks.
Why? Because he has no standing or grounds to adopt. So, unless you want to spend thousands of your hard earned money for a wasted legal proceeding, forget it.
 

diana_smith12

Junior Member
Thanks, I guess. :confused: I thought you might be able to help me, but you don't seem to want to. Yes, if it is costly and time consuming, I won't worry about it. But I just thought this forum might be able to help. I guess I was wrong. Thanks anyway. :(
 

Zephyr

Senior Member
diana_smith12 said:
Thanks, I guess. :confused: I thought you might be able to help me, but you don't seem to want to. Yes, if it is costly and time consuming, I won't worry about it. But I just thought this forum might be able to help. I guess I was wrong. Thanks anyway. :(

You still have the option, which would cost you NOTHING to do, of asking your ex if he is willing to do that since he is not part of the child's life.
 

diana_smith12

Junior Member
Thanks. That was all I was asking. What is the first step? Asking the ex to give up his rights? Do I need to file paperwork before, or after? I am pretty sure he will seeing that he has never contacted us and he wouldn't have to pay child support anymore. Yes, that is an assumption. But it doesn't hurt to ask. What's the worst that can happen? He says no, and I still receive my support $$ every month. I just wanted my husband to have rights in case something was to happen to me. After all, he is a dad to my son, he should be able to get some rights as a guardian. I would hate to have my son taken away from my husband to people that he doesn't know across the country. My son & my husband would be crushed. I just want to protect them both. Thanks.
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
diana_smith12 said:
Thanks. That was all I was asking. What is the first step? Asking the ex to give up his rights? Do I need to file paperwork before, or after? I am pretty sure he will seeing that he has never contacted us and he wouldn't have to pay child support anymore. Yes, that is an assumption. But it doesn't hurt to ask. What's the worst that can happen? He says no, and I still receive my support $$ every month. I just wanted my husband to have rights in case something was to happen to me. After all, he is a dad to my son, he should be able to get some rights as a guardian. I would hate to have my son taken away from my husband to people that he doesn't know across the country. My son & my husband would be crushed. I just want to protect them both. Thanks.
And this has nothing to do with adoption. So, you are going to attempt to cut the child's father out of his life, and yes, even after years of no contact the child is usually the one wanting to renew the contact, just because you want step pappy to have certain 'right'?

Kind of like cutting off your left breast because there's a pimple on it.

If that is ALL you want, then instead of going through a process that, in the best of circumstances can lead to thousands and months if not years of time and that's IF papa bear agrees, file a peition for 'Stand-by Guardianship'.
 

diana_smith12

Junior Member
Okay. :confused: I guess I shouldn't have come to you for advice, if you were going to be rude about it. My son will have complete knowledge of his bio father and his wherabouts, when he is old enough to understand, (isn't three yet). There will be no lying. But seeing that his bio father has made no contact, never wanted the child, and denied paternity, I thought it would make things easier to have him give up his rights to a child he doesn't want.
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
diana_smith12 said:
Okay. :confused: I guess I shouldn't have come to you for advice, if you were going to be rude about it. My son will have complete knowledge of his bio father and his wherabouts, when he is old enough to understand, (isn't three yet). There will be no lying. But seeing that his bio father has made no contact, never wanted the child, and denied paternity, I thought it would make things easier to have him give up his rights to a child he doesn't want.
You want rude lady I haven't even begun to start. You wanted an option I gave you one.

Frankly I don't care what happens to you, your brat or the rest of the world. But what I think and what you think doesn't matter one IOTA. The law matters and you have gotten what amounts to about $1,000 of FREE legal advice.

You don't like it? Then pull out your checkbook because you're going to start paying for a long time until daddy decides to give you your way.

Geeez how old are you 12? You lay down with dogs then don't complain about the fleas.
 

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