Step Parent Adoption

[coldeagle82]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

Hello, my fiance and I are planning on getting married in the next year or so and I have been our daughters father since she was one and a half. She'll be four in August, and I'm the only father she has ever known (and likely to know). I understand that a child is considered abandoned if they haven't communicated with the child in over a year and haven't provided financial support. The sperm donor has had to have his wages garnished to provide child support and it's gotten down to less than $100 a month (I contribute way more than that). He only saw her right after she was born (he left my fiance the day after he found out she was pregnant), and refused to even hold the child. If the guy doesn't support the adoption (the only time he has EVER shown any interest in the child is when I've posted something on Facebook and someone commented on the fact that I'm a good dad or some such, and it's been to say that I'm not her father...), will I likely run into any difficulties? I would like to stream line and honestly not have the drama (I'm hoping it won't come down to it, and hopefully the fact that he won't have his wages garnished any longer will be enough incentive). My daughter is young enough to where she doesn't understand all this crud and I would like to save her the confusion later.

Thanks for any advice!

 

[Eekamouse]

You're not her father. You aren't even her step father. You're just her mommy's current bed buddy. Why talk about adoption when you haven't even married her mother yet? When you say you want to spare your girlfriend's daughter (because she certainly isn't YOUR daughter) the confusion later on are you suggesting you plan on lying to her about who her father is? And don't refer to him as sperm donor. He is her father. I hope you are not having the child call you "daddy."

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

Hello, my fiance and I are planning on getting married in the next year or so and I have been our daughters father since she was one and a half. She'll be four in August, and I'm the only father she has ever known (and likely to know). I understand that a child is considered abandoned if they haven't communicated with the child in over a year and haven't provided financial support. The sperm donor has had to have his wages garnished to provide child support and it's gotten down to less than $100 a month (I contribute way more than that). He only saw her right after she was born (he left my fiance the day after he found out she was pregnant), and refused to even hold the child. If the guy doesn't support the adoption (the only time he has EVER shown any interest in the child is when I've posted something on Facebook and someone commented on the fact that I'm a good dad or some such, and it's been to say that I'm not her father...), will I likely run into any difficulties? I would like to stream line and honestly not have the drama (I'm hoping it won't come down to it, and hopefully the fact that he won't have his wages garnished any longer will be enough incentive). My daughter is young enough to where she doesn't understand all this crud and I would like to save her the confusion later.

Thanks for any advice!

HOW DARE YOU. You are not the child's father. The child's father is the guy your fiancé slept with, had sex with and whose child she delivered. The guy who has been established as father and who is paying child support. Garnishing wages is normal. He is not a sperm donor. You however are an alienating jerk. YOU are NOT her father at all. She is NOT your daughter. She the father of the man who is paying child support. The child's ACTUAL father hasn't abandoned her. You are ridiculous however and if dad takes mom to court, you could find yourself with a third party no interference order prohibiting you from being involved due to your overstepping.

 

[Ohiogal]

You're not her father. You aren't even her step father. You're just her mommy's current bed buddy. Why talk about adoption when you haven't even married her mother yet? When you say you want to spare your girlfriend's daughter (because she certainly isn't YOUR daughter) the confusion later on are you suggesting you plan on lying to her about who her father is? And don't refer to him as sperm donor. He is her father. I hope you are not having the child call you "daddy."

Oh come on... we know he is based on how often he refers to this legal stranger as "his daughter". Can we call HIM overstepping?

 

[Silverplum]

Please don't. Your hate for Dad is poisonous. Little Girl is his child.

 

[Just Blue]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

Hello, my fiance and I are planning on getting married in the next year or so and I have been our daughters father since she was one and a half. She'll be four in August, and I'm the only father she has ever known (and likely to know). I understand that a child is considered abandoned if they haven't communicated with the child in over a year and haven't provided financial support. The sperm donor has had to have his wages garnished to provide child support and it's gotten down to less than $100 a month (I contribute way more than that). He only saw her right after she was born (he left my fiance the day after he found out she was pregnant), and refused to even hold the child. If the guy doesn't support the adoption (the only time he has EVER shown any interest in the child is when I've posted something on Facebook and someone commented on the fact that I'm a good dad or some such, and it's been to say that I'm not her father...), will I likely run into any difficulties? I would like to stream line and honestly not have the drama (I'm hoping it won't come down to it, and hopefully the fact that he won't have his wages garnished any longer will be enough incentive). My daughter is young enough to where she doesn't understand all this crud and I would like to save her the confusion later.

Thanks for any advice!

The only thing I like about your post is your user name...it says MUCH about you.