step parent adoption in case of rape or incest

[helpinla]

California

In the case of rape or incest, is bio father consent needed for step parent adoption? I was also underage at the time. Please advise!

[Shay-Pari'e]

First, has paternity been established through DNA?

[helpinla]

no, not on birth certificate either

[Shay-Pari'e]

Does he know about the child? Has he been involved with the child?

Was this family member ever charged with rape?

[helpinla]

He was never charged with it, too scared at time to press charges. Really scared about having to notify him. He has threatened me several times.

[Shay-Pari'e]

So you never pressed charges?

I have to admit I am very leary of answering you. The simple fact that your husband wants to adopt, leads me to think you are not telling the whole story.

No one in your family knew you were raped bye a family member?

[helpinla]

As soon as I was raped, I ran away from home. My father was a very abusive, asian man. Had my child and came back to my family years later. My husband wants to adopt my child now. The man who raped me now is causing a lot of trouble in my life. Threatening me and my child. I don't know what to do at this point. Don't understand how someone can do that to a 14 year old girl, and then have any sort of rights. As I said, no dna test was ever done. He is not even on birth certificate. My child does not even know. Do I have to inform him? He is very unstable, and obviously dangerous, after what he did to me.

[rmet4nzkx]

[url]http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/courts/trial/courtlist.htm[/url]
Contact the family law facilitator's office for your county to file paternity, child support and DV protective orders, they and the DA's office will assist you under the victim witness program and report to CPS. The court will order a DNA test, you must have this test done to do anything, if there is a chance that the child has a different father you must be upfront about that fact as a different course of action would have to take place. How old are you now?

[helpinla]

I am 24 now. If I have to file a paternity order, like you said, doesn't that mean that he will find out? That's what I'm terrified about. I know if he finds out, he will come after me and my child. There is no chance that anyone else is the father. I was 14 when it happened. Is there no other way without him having to find out? I don't want to put my child or myself in any further danger. Thank you for your help!

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by helpinla

I am 24 now. If I have to file a paternity order, like you said, doesn't that mean that he will find out? That's what I'm terrified about. I know if he finds out, he will come after me and my child. There is no chance that anyone else is the father. I was 14 when it happened. Is there no other way without him having to find out? I don't want to put my child or myself in any further danger. Thank you for your help!

Please get a consult with an attorney. I believe that there ARE ways that an adoption could be accomplished without the need to establish paternity. A local attorney can best advise you how.

[helpinla]

Thank you for all your help!

[rmet4nzkx]

Originally Posted by helpinla

I am 24 now. If I have to file a paternity order, like you said, doesn't that mean that he will find out? That's what I'm terrified about. I know if he finds out, he will come after me and my child. There is no chance that anyone else is the father. I was 14 when it happened. Is there no other way without him having to find out? I don't want to put my child or myself in any further danger. Thank you for your help!

This man committed a crime, your child is evidence. Why do you think I am talking DA office, victim witness program and restraining orders, for your protection. If you don't take care of this and put him away you will never be free of this. Who knows how many others this may have happened to? Do you have any sisters or female relatives? For Lidj's benefit, the DA office is an attorney. After you do this your husband will be free to adopt your child, but bio dad will have to pay restitution and do some jail time. It was not your fault but letting him get away with this does not protect you and it is hard to deny DNA.

[LdiJ]

For Lidj's benefit, the DA office is an attorney. After you do this your husband will be free to adopt your child, but bio dad will have to pay restitution and do some jail time. It was not your fault but letting him get away with this does not protect you and it is hard to deny DNA.

Rmet, that crack at me was gratuitous and unnecessary. I know perfectly well that a DA is an attorney, as well you know....and I was not suggesting she consult with that kind of attorney, as you also well know. As much as the bio-father of this child needs to go to jail, there is the child to consider. Establishing paternity may or may not be in the best interest of this child. I don't know the answer to that question and neither do you. She is 24, the child is 9 or 10....vulnerable times for both of them.

To the original poster. Consult with a local adoption attorney before you proceed with anything else. Maybe even get a consult with a criminal attorney as well. (not because you have any risk of being arrested but because a criminal attorney has knowledge that could be valuable to you) Make sure you are fully informed on all of your possible options and the possible outcomes before you make any decisions on how to proceed. You owe that to yourself and your child.

In the end Rmet's solution to this problem may be the best one...but it may require you moving out of the area to protect your child from the inevitable publicity such a case will generate....or it may require other protect measures that we can't anticipate here. That is part of the value of gaining knowledge before you act.

[crystaly]

To answer your question...In the state of California there are several ways to terminate a parents rights.

7611.5. Where Section 7611 does not apply, a man shall not be
presumed to be the natural father of a child if either of the
following is true:
(a) The child was conceived as a result of an act in violation of
Section 261 of the Penal Code and the father was convicted of that
violation.
(b) The child was conceived as a result of an act in violation of
Section 261.5 of the Penal Code, the father was convicted of that
violation, and the mother was under the age of 15 years and the
father was 21 years of age or older at the time of conception.

PRESS CHARGES~!!!!!



CALIFORNIA CODE
Home > Legal Research > States > California > California Code Search > Search Results > California Code



California Codes



FAMILY.CODE
SECTION 8600-8622





8600. An unmarried minor may be adopted by an adult as provided in
this part.


8601. (a) Except as otherwise provided in subdivision (b), a
prospective adoptive parent or parents shall be at least 10 years
older than the child.
(b) If the court is satisfied that the adoption of a child by a
stepparent, or by a sister, brother, aunt, uncle, or first cousin
and, if that person is married, by that person and that person's
spouse, is in the best interest of the parties and is in the public
interest, it may approve the adoption without regard to the ages of
the child and the prospective adoptive parent or parents.



8602. The consent of a child, if over the age of 12 years, is
necessary to the child's adoption.



8603. A married person, not lawfully separated from the person's
spouse, may not adopt a child without the consent of the spouse,
provided that the spouse is capable of giving that consent.



8604. (a) Except as provided in subdivision (b), a child having a
presumed father under Section 7611 may not be adopted without the
consent of the child's birth parents, if living.
(b) If one birth parent has been awarded custody by judicial
order, or has custody by agreement of both parents, and the other
birth parent for a period of one year willfully fails to communicate
with and to pay for the care, support, and education of the child
when able to do so, then the birth parent having sole custody may
consent to the adoption, but only after the birth parent not having
custody has been served with a copy of a citation in the manner
provided by law for the service of a summons in a civil action that
requires the birth parent not having custody to appear at the time
and place set for the appearance in court under Section 8718, 8823,
8913, or 9007.
(c) Failure of a birth parent to pay for the care, support, and
education of the child for the period of one year or failure of a
birth parent to communicate with the child for the period of one year
is prima facie evidence that the failure was willful and without
lawful excuse.


I'm in the middle of my husband adopting my daughter. We are using this code failure to support and pay. But your childs father is an alleged not presumed father. It can get a little confusing. Go through the california codes or use [url]www.adoptions.org[/url] website instead. there will be alot of advice there before you spend the money on an attorney. Also..there is a book that I bought "How to do your own stepparent adoption in California" by Frank Zagoni. It has really explained everything to me very well.

In your case all you have to do is send him a paper that he signs stating he is the possible alleged father and it asks him to sign it and terminate any rights he may have. I hear it is much easier to terminate the rights if the father is not on the birth certificate and has played no role in parenting. They look at the best interest of the child in this case rather than the rights of the father. Get the book...it would really answer all the questions you have better than anyone here can.