stepchild adoption in nc biological father missing

[madhouse52]

north carolina
I divorced in 1995, since then my ex-husband has seen my daughter 4 times.
the last time he saw her was 5 years ago. The only thing i recieve from my ex is 162.00 per month and that is taken right out of his check by social services (in virginia). My daughter is now 12 years old and my current husband wants to adopt her; however, i have no clue where my ex-husband is and i really do not want to find him since i found out he sexually assulted both of his sisters between the ages of 10 and 13. I want no contact between him and my daughter.

What should i do?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

north carolina
I divorced in 1995, since then my ex-husband has seen my daughter 4 times.
the last time he saw her was 5 years ago. The only thing i recieve from my ex is 162.00 per month and that is taken right out of his check by social services (in virginia). My daughter is now 12 years old and my current husband wants to adopt her; however, i have no clue where my ex-husband is and i really do not want to find him since i found out he sexually assulted both of his sisters between the ages of 10 and 13. I want no contact between him and my daughter.

What should i do?

Then you don't do anything and keep getting the money, it is not as if you couldn't locate him if you wanted to.

 

[crystaly]

north carolina
I divorced in 1995, since then my ex-husband has seen my daughter 4 times.
the last time he saw her was 5 years ago. The only thing i recieve from my ex is 162.00 per month and that is taken right out of his check by social services (in virginia). My daughter is now 12 years old and my current husband wants to adopt her; however, i have no clue where my ex-husband is and i really do not want to find him since i found out he sexually assulted both of his sisters between the ages of 10 and 13. I want no contact between him and my daughter.

What should i do?

If you do not know where he is then after you start the adoption you have to do whatever is in your power to try to find the father to get his permission. If you are unable to still locate him then you ask the court to allow you to put the adoption in the newspaper of his last known address for however long your state requires you to do that. Then you proceed with the adoption as if he has been notified. You must prove to the court that you placed the ad in the newspaper. Then it cannot be overturned because this is legally the way of notifieing someone that does not want to be found.

 

[Grace_Adler]

If you want to follow through with the adoption, go to the courthouse and tell them you want to file for a TPR and stepparent adoption. You can download the forms online. You can also do this yourself. You'll just have to pay filing fees and the homestudy with DSS unless you can have it waived. You'll have to run an add in the paper for a certain amount of time. I forget what the requirement is. You may have to do a homestudy with DSS but the statutes say it can be waived if the child has been with the stepparent for I think it's 2 yrs. To actually do the adoption, the requirement is placement for 90 days.

Here are some forms..

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/


Here's the decree..

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-1814-ia.pdf

Your child is 12 yrs old so you need their consent.

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-5169-ia.pdf

The petition and consent form..

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-5162-ia.pdf

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-5189-ia.pdf

If there are others you need, you can just download the forms right off that site.

Statutes..

On this one, scroll down to Article 11 for TPRs.

http://www.ncga.state.nc.us/gascripts/Statutes/StatutesTOC.pl?Chapter=0007B

Adoptions-

http://www.ncga.state.nc.us/gascripts/Statutes/StatutesTOC.pl?Chapter=0048

There are also other forms that can be found at www.nccourts.org

 

[aorjwilliams]

If you want to follow through with the adoption, go to the courthouse and tell them you want to file for a TPR and stepparent adoption. You can download the forms online. You can also do this yourself. You'll just have to pay filing fees and the homestudy with DSS unless you can have it waived. You'll have to run an add in the paper for a certain amount of time. I forget what the requirement is. You may have to do a homestudy with DSS but the statutes say it can be waived if the child has been with the stepparent for I think it's 2 yrs. To actually do the adoption, the requirement is placement for 90 days.

Here are some forms..

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/


Here's the decree..

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-1814-ia.pdf

Your child is 12 yrs old so you need their consent.

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-5169-ia.pdf

The petition and consent form..

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-5162-ia.pdf

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/dss-5189-ia.pdf

If there are others you need, you can just download the forms right off that site.

Statutes..

On this one, scroll down to Article 11 for TPRs.

http://www.ncga.state.nc.us/gascripts/Statutes/StatutesTOC.pl?Chapter=0007B

Adoptions-

http://www.ncga.state.nc.us/gascripts/Statutes/StatutesTOC.pl?Chapter=0048

There are also other forms that can be found at www.nccourts.org

Hi Grace,

Sorry to be asking this on someone else's thread, but I have a similar issue and am hoping you might have some advice for me as well. In my case, the bio father is/was not known to begin with. I don't wish to go into details, but just that I know there is no way to determine who he is due to the circumstances surrounding it (not from promiscuity as some people have assumed though) I would like to know how one would proceed with a step parent adoption, when there is no father to terminate rights for. I know I will need to publish something, but don't know if I should do what you advised the OP, or do something different. Also, will the court tell me what needs to be published and how to word it? Any info you could share with me would be greatly appreciated =) I have been trying to find info on the web on this, but have run into wall after wall.

 

[aorjwilliams]

Hi Grace,

Sorry to be asking this on someone else's thread, but I have a similar issue and am hoping you might have some advice for me as well. In my case, the bio father is/was not known to begin with. I don't wish to go into details, but just that I know there is no way to determine who he is due to the circumstances surrounding it (not from promiscuity as some people have assumed though) I would like to know how one would proceed with a step parent adoption, when there is no father to terminate rights for. I know I will need to publish something, but don't know if I should do what you advised the OP, or do something different. Also, will the court tell me what needs to be published and how to word it? Any info you could share with me would be greatly appreciated =) I have been trying to find info on the web on this, but have run into wall after wall.

I am very sorry, but I just went to my own thread and saw you replied there as I was asking this on here. I do wholeheartedly apologize, and appreciate your willingness to assist without criticizing =) Thanks so much!!!

 

[Grace_Adler]

Not a problem. LOL If you need any more help, just let me know. Also feel free to PM me. I don't know if I can help, but I'll try.