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stepfather wants to adopt children ,biological father does not waive rights

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snsallison

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? TN.
I have 2 children age 3&4.Their biological father has been in and out of prison,He has never even seen the 3yr old and was not around for the 4 yr old. about 1 1/2 yrs ago I met a wonderful man who I am engaged to and who wants to adopt my children.The kids only know him as their father. What can i do if the birthfather does not waive the rights to the children . The birthfather has also 5 other children who he has never paid child support to.
 


momofrose

Senior Member
snsallison said:
What is the name of your state? TN.
I have 2 children age 3&4.Their biological father has been in and out of prison,He has never even seen the 3yr old and was not around for the 4 yr old. about 1 1/2 yrs ago I met a wonderful man who I am engaged to and who wants to adopt my children.The kids only know him as their father. What can i do if the birthfather does not waive the rights to the children . The birthfather has also 5 other children who he has never paid child support to.
Have you contacted the attorney? DO you receive any child support?

By the way he is NOT the BIRTHFATHER - at this point he is the FATHER..

D
 

Neal1421

Senior Member
snsallison said:
What is the name of your state? TN.
I have 2 children age 3&4.Their biological father has been in and out of prison,He has never even seen the 3yr old and was not around for the 4 yr old. about 1 1/2 yrs ago I met a wonderful man who I am engaged to and who wants to adopt my children.The kids only know him as their father. What can i do if the birthfather does not waive the rights to the children . The birthfather has also 5 other children who he has never paid child support to.
Has paternity been established for the 2 children?

Is there a court order for support for your 2 children?
If there isn't a court order for child support he wasn't obligated to pay.
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
also, just because someone has been in prison does NOT necessarily mean they will lose their rights.

You are putting the cart way before the horse. At this point your boyfriend has no legal standing to adopt. And the court will NOT entertain a motion to adopt until you have been married for at least a year AND you can prove to the court that your children's father should have his rights terminated.

You are a long way from doing that.
 

snsallison

Junior Member
momofrose said:
Have you contacted the attorney? DO you receive any child support?

By the way he is NOT the BIRTHFATHER - at this point he is the FATHER..

D

I have not contacted an attorney yet .I just need to know what I have to do in case the birthfather does not waive his rights. The birthfather has been in jail for the last 4 yrs and just got out this month.i will apply to get child support which I dought he will pay ,because he is a drug addict/alcoholic and in the 7 yrs we where married he was locked up a total of 6 yrs and whenever he was out he was in the streets.He was probably in the streets 4 out of 7 days a week.In the 7 yrs of marriage he probably worked a total of 2weeks,2days here and there,then took the money and bought drugs.[by the way,if anybody is wondering about how he can be the father of the 3yr old, I had just found out I was pregnant aa month before he got locked up for the 4 yrs.]
 

snsallison

Junior Member
Neal1421 said:
Has paternity been established for the 2 children?

Is there a court order for support for your 2 children?
If there isn't a court order for child support he wasn't obligated to pay.
no not yet ,he just got out of jail this last week.And yes he is their biological father.but he probably never will pay child support because he is on drugs/alcohol.one of his ex's tried to get child support from him and he had to go to jail.He is 39 yrs old and has been in and out of jail ever since he was 18.Yes I know ,you probably say this was all my own fault but people make mistakes ,which I don't consider my 2 beautiful children a mistake ,so I guess something good came out of this "so called " marriage.
 

snsallison

Junior Member
BelizeBreeze said:
also, just because someone has been in prison does NOT necessarily mean they will lose their rights.

You are putting the cart way before the horse. At this point your boyfriend has no legal standing to adopt. And the court will NOT entertain a motion to adopt until you have been married for at least a year AND you can prove to the court that your children's father should have his rights terminated.

You are a long way from doing that.
I did not mean cause he is in jail he does not have any rights,but I also know that he is a drug addict and has probably worked 1 or 2 weeks the whole 7 yrs we where married,and then took whatever money he got then ,and took it to the streets.My boyfriend loves my children and wants to ,and has been taken care of them . he wants to make sure also in case something happens to him THEY would be taken care of.
 

Neal1421

Senior Member
snsallison said:
no not yet ,he just got out of jail this last week.And yes he is their biological father.but he probably never will pay child support because he is on drugs/alcohol.one of his ex's tried to get child support from him and he had to go to jail.He is 39 yrs old and has been in and out of jail ever since he was 18.Yes I know ,you probably say this was all my own fault but people make mistakes ,which I don't consider my 2 beautiful children a mistake ,so I guess something good came out of this "so called " marriage.
Where you married when the 2 children were born?

If not, then he has not legally been named as the father unless he signed the Acknowledgment of Paternity at the hospital or had a DNA test done.

If paternity has been established, you may be able to get his rights terminated without his consent if he has been convicted of a felony. You would have to be married for a year though before that could happen and your husband would have to adopt the children. Parental rights will not be terminated until there is someone (step parent) to adopt.

Statute: §§ 36-1-113(g)-(h); 37-1-166(g)(4) Full text

Circumstances That Are Grounds for Termination

Abandonment or Extreme Parental Disinterest

Abuse/Neglect

Mental Illness or Deficiency

Felony Conviction/Incarceration

Failure of Reasonable Efforts

Abuse/Neglect or Loss of Rights of Another Child

Failure to Provide Support

Failure to Establish Paternity

Child's Best Interest

Child in care 15 of 22 months (or less)

Felony assault of child or sibling

Murder/Manslaughter of sibling child

Circumstances That Are Not Grounds for Termination

Alcohol or Drug Induced Incapacity

Sexual Abuse

Child Judged in Need of Services/Dependent
 

bononos

Senior Member
snsallison said:
I have not contacted an attorney yet .I just need to know what I have to do in case the birthfather does not waive his rights. The birthfather has been in jail for the last 4 yrs and just got out this month.i will apply to get child support which I dought he will pay ,because he is a drug addict/alcoholic and in the 7 yrs we where married he was locked up a total of 6 yrs and whenever he was out he was in the streets.He was probably in the streets 4 out of 7 days a week.In the 7 yrs of marriage he probably worked a total of 2weeks,2days here and there,then took the money and bought drugs.[by the way,if anybody is wondering about how he can be the father of the 3yr old, I had just found out I was pregnant aa month before he got locked up for the 4 yrs.]
Why did you marry this man???????????????????????????
And why did you have not 1 but 2 children with this man????????????????????????????????????
 

snsallison

Junior Member
Neal1421 said:
Where you married when the 2 children were born?

If not, then he has not legally been named as the father unless he signed the Acknowledgment of Paternity at the hospital or had a DNA test done.

If paternity has been established, you may be able to get his rights terminated without his consent if he has been convicted of a felony. You would have to be married for a year though before that could happen and your husband would have to adopt the children. Parental rights will not be terminated until there is someone (step parent) to adopt.

Statute: §§ 36-1-113(g)-(h); 37-1-166(g)(4) Full text

Circumstances That Are Grounds for Termination

Abandonment or Extreme Parental Disinterest

Abuse/Neglect

Mental Illness or Deficiency

Felony Conviction/Incarceration

Failure of Reasonable Efforts

Abuse/Neglect or Loss of Rights of Another Child

Failure to Provide Support

Failure to Establish Paternity

Child's Best Interest

Child in care 15 of 22 months (or less)

Felony assault of child or sibling

Murder/Manslaughter of sibling child

Circumstances That Are Not Grounds for Termination

Alcohol or Drug Induced Incapacity

Sexual Abuse

Child Judged in Need of Services/Dependent
Yes we where married when the kids where born ,but he was in jail both times the kids where born,and I did put him down as the father on the birth certificate because he is. he did not sign anything at the hospital because he was not there,but he was to take a paternaty test , well we would not have to do that because he is the father. well ,yes true I'm not married to my fiance yet but we will be in the next 2 months,and I guess we will have to wait a year ,which will be ok too. But thank you very much ,your answer has really helped me alot .Just one more thing ,do I have to get an attorney?
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
The one thing you'd better get used to is that your fiance cannot adopt now and in the future, if he does try to adopt, you will first have to petition the court to terminate the father's rights.

Part of that termination proceeding is to identify the father to the court, the father will be notified of the hearing and may or may not deny permission for the adoption and contest the termination.

If you think this is going to be a one or two month process, you'd better think again. Such proceedings can last more than a year to more than five years depending on the situation and relevant facts of each case.
 

Neal1421

Senior Member
snsallison said:
Yes we where married when the kids where born ,but he was in jail both times the kids where born,and I did put him down as the father on the birth certificate because he is. he did not sign anything at the hospital because he was not there,but he was to take a paternaty test , well we would not have to do that because he is the father. well ,yes true I'm not married to my fiance yet but we will be in the next 2 months,and I guess we will have to wait a year ,which will be ok too. But thank you very much ,your answer has really helped me alot .Just one more thing ,do I have to get an attorney?
Yes, I wouldn't advise you to try to do this without one.
 
N

nicetryadmin

Guest
snsallison said:
Yes we where married when the kids where born ,but he was in jail both times the kids where born,and I did put him down as the father on the birth certificate because he is. he did not sign anything at the hospital because he was not there,but he was to take a paternaty test , well we would not have to do that because he is the father. well ,yes true I'm not married to my fiance yet but we will be in the next 2 months,and I guess we will have to wait a year ,which will be ok too. But thank you very much ,your answer has really helped me alot .Just one more thing ,do I have to get an attorney?
Just because you have an attorney does not mean you will be able to terminate the dad's rights nor will an attorney force dad to sign over his rights. PERIOD!

You were well aware of his issues while you were with him. Obviously his unemployment for the SEVEN YEARS you were together wasn't an issue then, so even attempting to bring it up in court will be thrown right back at ya. Oh and his drug issues just happened overnight, huh???
 
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