Undo and Adoption as an Adult

What is the name of your state? Kansas


When I was a child, my biological father was a deadbeat and an abuser. He and my mother divorced when I was 4. My mother remarried and when I was five, my then stepfater [I'm sure with prodding from my mother] wanted to adopt me. I remember very little of the ordeal, but I believe that my mother told the judge that my biological father was "whereabouts unknown" and that paved the way for the adoption by the stepfather.

Turns out, the stepfather/adapted father was pretty much a loser as well [boy my mother can pick 'em]. I'm now thirty years old. This man has pretty much brought me nothing but grief my entire life. Is there any way as an adult now, that I can undo this thing? I have equity in my name right now, I wouldn't change that, but I'd sure like for this dirtbag to be off my birth certificate and have no legal relation to me. Is that possible?

[nextwife]

Gee, If the name were not important to hang onto, a name chage would be one way to unload a portion of the connection. It's too bad that he couldn't offer you the daddy you deserved to have.

Honest, I don't know of any way, other than asking that his paternal rights be terminated (would he be willing?) and having someone else adopt you. Are they still married? If your mom is single, maybe she would be allowed to do a single parent adoption, as no CS is involved. Woman are allowed to adopt alone. I'm not an attorney, these are just ideas.

I would think the first and easiest step for you would be a name change. In most states, it's a couple of forms, a court date where you testify that you're not changing your name to avoid legal action to be taken against you, and it's done. It takes about a month. I wouldn't waste money on name change kits, etc - it's easy to do for free.

The next step is something I have less knowledge of. I don't know much about reversing the adoption process, unless you know an adult who you have in mind to adopt you where the birth certificate would be changed. Wish I could be more helpful.