Want to give baby up - "bf" is MARRIED...

So technically I cannot even use the term "bf." He has been abusive the last 2 years of our relationship.

He scares me to death because although I want to keep our daughter and I already love her, I know me. I know this situation and it will not work out. He had been very suppportive, extremely, when I talked the past few months about keeping her. I have had a change of heart because he is already trying to teach me about his religion and his beliefs and I just would never, EVER believe what he does. And obviously this is NOT the situation to raise a child in. I am 28 and believe I could support the child on my own if I really put everything I had into it. But HE will make my life a living hell.

I don't know how I will do this, but I know in my heart it is the right thing to do. I have tried to talk with him and even told him we could pick out a couple of his choosing and he won't listen. He is already saying that if I try to give the baby up, he will get custody. I don't want this happening. I have yet to talk with anyone in detail about this situation, but does he really have a chance to get her? I have been told that he only has 30 days after the baby is born, but 30 days - for what? He has also been abusive (has punched me on several occasions, pushes me and loses his temper) Isn't that all the court needs to hear in order to determine him an unfit father?

[Clover]

Christine,

I would be willing to wager that the father of your child will not give you a problem regarding the adoption of your child. The harsh reality of the situation is if the man would not leave his wife for you, he probably wouldn't leave his wife for your child, nor welcome the child into his life or his wifes. The child will be a reminder of his infidelities.

The 30 days you mention is in reference to that he has 30 days after the birth of the child to contest it. You have a similar amount of time to change your mind as well.

I am no legal proffesional, just a mom.

We have been thinking of adoption for a few years now, and are the parents of four children already. I would love to email you regarding your baby. If you feel led, please email me. [email]laureanpc@yahoo.com[/email]

Clover

Christine,

Please, Please contact me as soon as possible. My husband and I are in a similar situation. We took custody of a baby girl three days old from the hospital. We have fought the biological father and his wife for over eight months, There is so much u need to know. I can be contacted at [email]AngelCuddle@yahoo.com[/email]

I wanna help ypu by giving u all the information you need. ANd please do not be afraid of this man. But be concerned cause you do have a lot to worry about. Biological parents have first rights to a child, all he has to do is prove paternity, but there are ways around this and I can help you by telling u my story and what NOT to do.

Godbless,

Angel

Christine, I admire you for making a tough decision such as putting a child up for adoption. I don't have any advice about the bf and the legalities of anything. However, I do have information on a great couple who are trying to adopt a child. She can't conceive and would love to have a child to raise. Good Luck with everything.