Can my ex-wife break our settlement agreement?

[LaJay55]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I have a signed notarized settlement agreement that my ex (separated) wife and I agreed to. We signed this in June. One week ago she decided that she did not want to agree to the settlement agreement anymore. I have been paying her monthly based on the agreement and she has accepted the payments. We split everything. The only thing that is at issue is the 40k she spent for elective cosmetic surgery. I was against her getting this procedure and did not sign for any of the loans that she used to receive this procedure. In the settlement agreement she stated that she is responsible for all cost associated with the procedures. Now she decided that she wants me to pay half (20k).

Please help!!!

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by LaJay55

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I have a signed notarized settlement agreement that my ex (separated) wife and I agreed to. We signed this in June. One week ago she decided that she did not want to agree to the settlement agreement anymore. I have been paying her monthly based on the agreement and she has accepted the payments. We split everything. The only thing that is at issue is the 40k she spent for elective cosmetic surgery. I was against her getting this procedure and did not sign for any of the loans that she used to receive this procedure. In the settlement agreement she stated that she is responsible for all cost associated with the procedures. Now she decided that she wants me to pay half (20k).

Please help!!!

Unless that notarized agreement was submitted to the court and signed off by a judge, it's generally not going to hold much water.

You can try to have it become part of the record, but don't hold your breathe. She can change her mind pretty much right up until the final decree is signed (and in some circumstances even after that).

Quite honestly you may want to consult with an attorney - make sure your interests are protected, and make sure any agreements you make will become part of the final order and will then be enforceable.

ETA: for the most part a notarized document is guaranteeing only that the signatory has provided ID proving that s/he is indeed who s/he claims to be. There are some exceptions to this but as a general rule it won't become enforceable until it's actually endorsed by the court.

[LaJay55]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

Unless that notarized agreement was submitted to the court and signed off by a judge, it's generally not going to hold much water.

You can try to have it become part of the record, but don't hold your breathe. She can change her mind pretty much right up until the final decree is signed (and in some circumstances even after that).

Quite honestly you may want to consult with an attorney - make sure your interests are protected, and make sure any agreements you make will become part of the final order and will then be enforceable.

ETA: for the most part a notarized document is guaranteeing only that the signatory has provided ID proving that s/he is indeed who s/he claims to be. There are some exceptions to this but as a general rule it won't become enforceable until it's actually endorsed by the court.

thanks for the advice.

Does it mean anything that she secured these loans on her own and I was not jointly involved with any of them?

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by LaJay55

thanks for the advice.

Does it mean anything that she secured these loans on her own and I was not jointly involved with any of them?

Were the loans obtained after your separation?

If not they will be considered a community debt and you'll be equally liable (no matter who signed for the loans, who made the payments and who benefited from the loans)

[LaJay55]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

Were the loans obtained after your separation?

If not they will be considered a community debt and you'll be equally liable (no matter who signed for the loans, who made the payments and who benefited from the loans)

Dumbest law ever! So I could of gone out and secured a $100,000 loan without her even knowing and she would be liable for half? Wow!!!!

What happens if I don't pay? I do not have that kind of money

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by LaJay55

Dumbest law ever! So I could of gone out and secured a $100,000 loan without her even knowing and she would be liable for half? Wow!!!!

What happens if I don't pay? I do not have that kind of money

That can vary, but the bottom line is the debt could eventually result in wage garnishment, bank account levy, lien on property etc.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

Were the loans obtained after your separation?

If not they will be considered a community debt and you'll be equally liable (no matter who signed for the loans, who made the payments and who benefited from the loans)

I am not entirely sure that I agree with you in this instance. Even in a community property state a judge does have some descretion. She got the loans for elective cosmetic surgery that he disagreed with her getting. A judge might not hold him responsible for 1/2 of those loans.

[nextwife]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

I am not entirely sure that I agree with you in this instance. Even in a community property state a judge does have some descretion. She got the loans for elective cosmetic surgery that he disagreed with her getting. A judge might not hold him responsible for 1/2 of those loans.

I agree with you. She gets the sole benefit of this expense. Maybe even got it with the idea of pursuing a different relationship.

[Proserpina]

OP might have some difficulty proving that.

Because the loans were taken out prior to the separation it would not be difficult for wifey to claim all manner of odd/false things - and though personally I feel the wife has a nerve doing what she's apparently doing, it does place something of a burden on OP. Perhaps that notarized agreement can be used to his advantage - it will depend if it's actually admissible, yes?

[nextwife]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

OP might have some difficulty proving that.

Because the loans were taken out prior to the separation it would not be difficult for wifey to claim all manner of odd/false things - and though personally I feel the wife has a nerve doing what she's apparently doing, it does place something of a burden on OP. Perhaps that notarized agreement can be used to his advantage - it will depend if it's actually admissible, yes?

She still gets the sole benefit and incurred the debt contrary to the desires of the spouse. IN WI, any loan extended after marriage, for example, requires BOTH spouses to sign if the creditor wishes it to be considered marital.

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by nextwife

She still gets the sole benefit and incurred the debt contrary to the desires of the spouse. IN WI, any loan extended after marriage, for example, requires BOTH spouses to sign if the creditor wishes it to be considered marital.

Then we need to know if that's the same in California. As a sidenote - and I am honestly not being a twit when I ask this - but can he truly claim that she was the sole beneficiary? Can he prove he didn't want her to do it?

In the meantime I'll try to see if CA actually addresses this in any great detail.

(Drat, where is CC when I need her?!)

[LaJay55]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

Then we need to know if that's the same in California. As a sidenote - and I am honestly not being a twit when I ask this - but can he truly claim that she was the sole beneficiary? Can he prove he didn't want her to do it?

In the meantime I'll try to see if CA actually addresses this in any great detail.

(Drat, where is CC when I need her?!)

I guess the only way I can prove it if she lies to a judge is try to get statements from her mother(doubt she'll be on my side.lol)and my grandmother. Both of them knew that I did not want these procedures. My grandmother is also willing to testify in front of a judge (not sure if they do that in divorce court)

PS-Thanks for the people that responded and gave me some hope.