Common law and divorce

[tombstone]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Colorado

Hello all,

So I am seeking advice. I have recently told my wife (common law) that I want a divorce. I have 2 young children, the youngest of which is only around 5 months. I have been with her for about 13 years and we have been claiming married on taxes and things for about 7 years. I am curious if anyone has been in a similar situation and what I can expect to pay her for spousal support and maintenance? She doesn't have a degree, she hasn't worked in about 7 years since our oldest was born. Thanks.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Colorado

Hello all,

So I am seeking advice. I have recently told my wife (common law) that I want a divorce. I have 2 young children, the youngest of which is only around 5 months. I have been with her for about 13 years and we have been claiming married on taxes and things for about 7 years. I am curious if anyone has been in a similar situation and what I can expect to pay her for spousal support and maintenance? She doesn't have a degree, she hasn't worked in about 7 years since our oldest was born. Thanks.

How much do you earn? Who will have primary custody of the children? Start with those questions. Your marriage -- common law -- is treated the same as a marriage with a license. What you pay will depend on factors you haven't shared with us. Most likely you will pay for a length of time from a few months to a period equivalent to half the marriage.

 

[tombstone]

So the "earning" part is a little complicated... possibly... So my base is over 100k a year and I also am eligible for bonuses 2 times a year which from what I understand could be 15%+ of my annual salary. So if that is the case I could get 7.5%+ in say August and another 7.5%+ in February or thereabouts. She is also saying that she is going to move back to her hometown which is in another state about 3 hours away from where we are now because it is "best for the kids". I told her there was no way she could do that unless she could prove that I was an unfit father. I do work a lot but I have already spoken to my work and they are willing to work with me depending on what the custody schedule might be and I also have the ability to work from home.

 

[Silverplum]

So the "earning" part is a little complicated... possibly... So my base is over 100k a year and I also am eligible for bonuses 2 times a year which from what I understand could be 15%+ of my annual salary. So if that is the case I could get 7.5%+ in say August and another 7.5%+ in February or thereabouts. She is also saying that she is going to move back to her hometown which is in another state about 3 hours away from where we are now because it is "best for the kids". I told her there was no way she could do that unless she could prove that I was an unfit father. I do work a lot but I have already spoken to my work and they are willing to work with me depending on what the custody schedule might be and I also have the ability to work from home.

Regarding the bolded: make darn sure she doesn't move, and if she does, file immediately for the return of the child/ren. Are you the legal father?

Also, you do not have your facts correct about the circumstances under which she may be allowed to move away.

I'd advise you to hire an attorney.

 

[Ohiogal]

Regarding the bolded: make darn sure she doesn't move, and if she does, file immediately for the return of the child/ren. Are you the legal father?

Also, you do not have your facts correct about the circumstances under which she may be allowed to move away.

I'd advise you to hire an attorney.

Definitely, if he is earning over 100k a year he needs an attorney. No ifs, ands or buts about it.

 

[tombstone]

Yes, I am the legal father to both kids.

So you are saying she could take them out of the state even if I contest it the judge might award her that?

 

[Silverplum]

Yes, I am the legal father to both kids.

Good. So few bother with the "paperwork" and the "legalities" and then are screwed when the relationship goes downhill.

So you are saying she could take them out of the state even if I contest it the judge might award her that?

Yes.

 

[tombstone]

Basically what she is wanting is 50% of everything and to move away and take the kids and I can see them on the weekends during the school year.

 

[ecmst12]

It's possible, yes. It depends on the specific facts of your situation. You really need a lawyer ASAP.

 

[tombstone]

Are there any circumstances that you could point out that would allow her to do that and take the kids away from their father?

 

[Silverplum]

Basically what she is wanting is 50% of everything and to move away and take the kids and I can see them on the weekends during the school year.

Yes, well, people want stuff.

It's your job to prevent that from happening to you. Hire an attorney.

 

[Silverplum]

Are there any circumstances that you could point out that would allow her to do that and take the kids away from their father?

Moving first and asking permission later.
Moving and having a reason the judge finds reasonable.
Asking permission and having a reason the judge finds reasonable.

Hire. An. Attorney.

 

[tombstone]

Ok, and as far as hiring an attorney if we both get one chances are I will pay for my and her attorneys is that right?

 

[Silverplum]

Ok, and as far as hiring an attorney if we both get one chances are I will pay for my and her attorneys is that right?

If she asks that you pay her attorney fees and the judge finds that reasonable, then it's possible.

It's not standard.

 

[tombstone]

Ah ok, gotcha. I was just figuring I would be picking up the tab for everything given that I am the only one working and have always been the highest earner in the relationship. And she hasn't worked since just before our 7.5 year old was born.