Ending alimony issue in NJ

[Pete_NJ]

Before I start, this takes place in New Jersey and I hired a lawyer on Friday. The marriage was 18 years and have been divorced for 4 1/2 years.

My x-spouse remarried on 9/18/11. I have pictures of the ceremony from Facebook with my kids in these pictures and the pictures have captions indicating it is a wedding. My divorce settlement only says that I am to pay her permanent alimony. It does not mention anything about the termination of alimony. I called the county probation dept and they say that alimony is to continue as there is nothing in the settlement for them to indicate alimony should end should she remarry. She has not told me or the probation dept that she has remarried. The below statute is listed on a NJ State web site and my lawyer confirmed that this is a valid statute.

2. N.J.S.2A:34-25 is amended to read as follows:

Termination of alimony.

2A:34-25. If after the judgment of divorce a former spouse shall remarry, permanent and limited duration alimony shall terminate as of the date of remarriage except that any arrearages that have accrued prior to the date of remarriage shall not be vacated or annulled. A former spouse who remarries shall promptly so inform the spouse paying permanent or limited duration alimony as well as the collecting agency, if any. The court may order such alimony recipient who fails to comply with the notification provision of this act to pay any reasonable attorney fees and court costs incurred by the recipient's former spouse as a result of such non-compliance. The remarriage of a former spouse receiving rehabilitative or reimbursement alimony shall not be cause for termination of such alimony by the court unless the court finds that the circumstances upon which the award was based have not occurred or unless the payer spouse demonstrates an agreement or good cause to the contrary.

Alimony shall terminate upon the death of the payer spouse, except that any arrearages that have accrued prior to the date of the payer spouse's death shall not be vacated or annulled.

Nothing in this act shall be construed to prohibit a court from ordering either spouse to maintain life insurance for the protection of the former spouse or the children of the marriage in the event of the payer spouse's death.

(cf: P.L.1997, c.301, s.1)

3. This act shall take effect immediately.

Link to the above quote: ftp://www.njleg.state.nj.us/19981999/PL99/199_.HTM
Sorry you have to copy and paste the URL.

My lawyer believes alimony should be terminated in this instance and is starting the process for me. Of course I guess it was an oversight by myself and my original attorney when the settlement was written to have alimony termination listed.

My question here is what would take precedence? The laws written by the state or what is written in the settlement papers? I would think the state has those laws for a reason and they could not be over ruled as in this instance.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[mistoffolees]

BMy lawyer believes alimony should be terminated in this instance and is starting the process for me. Of course I guess it was an oversight by myself and my original attorney when the settlement was written to have alimony termination listed.

My question here is what would take precedence? The laws written by the state or what is written in the settlement papers? I would think the state has those laws for a reason and they could not be over ruled as in this instance.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Any reason you want us to second guess your attorney?

 

[stealth2]

Generally speaking, your specific order would rule.

 

[Pete_NJ]

Any reason you want us to second guess your attorney?

Not at all.
I have been anxious for this to occur of course to regain my life back. I see no reason someone earning under 6 figures (me) would need to supplement the x-spouse when they now have two incomes. It's essentially a lottery win for them and I am still in the poor house. It is huge disappointment that termination was not mentioned. Just like it was mistake with the original marriage, I never got divorced before and made another mistake at the divorce.

I am just seeking, HOPEFULLY, some reassurance here that alimony will cease.

And I could see that if I was worth millions of dollars, maybe the alimony could be permanent, but someone earning under 6 figures? All I have ever heard was once the receiving spouse remarries, then alimony always ends. I'm no lawyer of course, but I thought that would be the case in every state perhaps. By paying alimony, my income for me is now at a level going back decades. Why should I be tortured for life by paying lifetime alimony, she can live happily ever after and I would be miserable, makes no sense.

 

[LdiJ]

Not at all.
I have been anxious for this to occur of course to regain my life back. I see no reason someone earning under 6 figures (me) would need to supplement the x-spouse when they now have two incomes. It's essentially a lottery win for them and I am still in the poor house. It is huge disappointment that termination was not mentioned. Just like it was mistake with the original marriage, I never got divorced before and made another mistake at the divorce.

I am just seeking, HOPEFULLY, some reassurance here that alimony will cease.

And I could see that if I was worth millions of dollars, maybe the alimony could be permanent, but someone earning under 6 figures? All I have ever heard was once the receiving spouse remarries, then alimony always ends. I'm no lawyer of course, but I thought that would be the case in every state perhaps.

It IS possible for a court ordered agreement to override a statute...if what is contained in the order is not illegal. Therefore the actual wording of your court order, not how you have paraphrased it, is key.

Since your attorney believes that alimony can be terminated at this point, I can only assume that the wording of your agreement is not written in a way to override the statute.

 

[mistoffolees]

Not at all.
I have been anxious for this to occur of course to regain my life back. I see no reason someone earning under 6 figures (me) would need to supplement the x-spouse when they now have two incomes. It's essentially a lottery win for them and I am still in the poor house. It is huge disappointment that termination was not mentioned. Just like it was mistake with the original marriage, I never got divorced before and made another mistake at the divorce.

I am just seeking, HOPEFULLY, some reassurance here that alimony will cease.

And I could see that if I was worth millions of dollars, maybe the alimony could be permanent, but someone earning under 6 figures? All I have ever heard was once the receiving spouse remarries, then alimony always ends. I'm no lawyer of course, but I thought that would be the case in every state perhaps. By paying alimony, my income for me is now at a level going back decades. Why should I be tortured for life by paying lifetime alimony, she can live happily ever after and I would be miserable, makes no sense.

It's really simple:

- Your attorney has a copy of your court decree. We don't.
- Your attorney knows the judge. We don't.
- Your attorney knows the date of the statute and all the case law involving the statute. We don't.
- Your attorney knows the climate of the local court. We don't.

If your attorney is telling you that alimony can be terminated, then odds are that he's write. Certainly, it's more likely to be true than advice you get from anonymous strangers who don't have all the information above. As for the rest, you need to relax. You're doing everything you can do, so there's no point in worrying. Whatever is going to happen will happen.

 

[Pete_NJ]

It's really simple:

- Your attorney has a copy of your court decree. We don't.
- Your attorney knows the judge. We don't.
- Your attorney knows the date of the statute and all the case law involving the statute. We don't.
- Your attorney knows the climate of the local court. We don't.

If your attorney is telling you that alimony can be terminated, then odds are that he's write. Certainly, it's more likely to be true than advice you get from anonymous strangers who don't have all the information above. As for the rest, you need to relax. You're doing everything you can do, so there's no point in worrying. Whatever is going to happen will happen.

True, yes I understand what you are saying. I need to let things take their course and relax. It's just very difficult from my perspective. I fully understand what most men go through in this situation and feel the anxiety that they have. Everyone is different how they react to things and I sort of understand the news stories that I hear.

 

[Bali Hai]

Before I start, this takes place in New Jersey and I hired a lawyer on Friday. The marriage was 18 years and have been divorced for 4 1/2 years.

My x-spouse remarried on 9/18/11. I have pictures of the ceremony from Facebook with my kids in these pictures and the pictures have captions indicating it is a wedding. My divorce settlement only says that I am to pay her permanent alimony. It does not mention anything about the termination of alimony. I called the county probation dept and they say that alimony is to continue as there is nothing in the settlement for them to indicate alimony should end should she remarry. She has not told me or the probation dept that she has remarried. The below statute is listed on a NJ State web site and my lawyer confirmed that this is a valid statute.



Link to the above quote: ftp://www.njleg.state.nj.us/19981999/PL99/199_.HTM
Sorry you have to copy and paste the URL.

My lawyer believes alimony should be terminated in this instance and is starting the process for me. Of course I guess it was an oversight by myself and my original attorney when the settlement was written to have alimony termination listed.

My question here is what would take precedence? The laws written by the state or what is written in the settlement papers? I would think the state has those laws for a reason and they could not be over ruled as in this instance.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

When you agree to pay the alimony (if that was the case) it complicates the issue for modification down the road. Therefore, unless it's to YOUR clear advantage, you should NEVER agree to pay alimony. You let the judge order it instead. In that case, the state statutes you cite clearly would apply.

 

[tuffbrk]

Not at all.
I have been anxious for this to occur of course to regain my life back. I see no reason someone earning under 6 figures (me) would need to supplement the x-spouse when they now have two incomes. It's essentially a lottery win for them and I am still in the poor house. It is huge disappointment that termination was not mentioned. Just like it was mistake with the original marriage, I never got divorced before and made another mistake at the divorce.

I am just seeking, HOPEFULLY, some reassurance here that alimony will cease.

And I could see that if I was worth millions of dollars, maybe the alimony could be permanent, but someone earning under 6 figures? All I have ever heard was once the receiving spouse remarries, then alimony always ends. I'm no lawyer of course, but I thought that would be the case in every state perhaps. By paying alimony, my income for me is now at a level going back decades. Why should I be tortured for life by paying lifetime alimony, she can live happily ever after and I would be miserable, makes no sense.

Collection of alimony stops only after the judge signs the motion. Your attorney can advise you if an "as of" date can be included. Recent divisions from the NJ appellate court have stated that if termination upon remarriage is silent in your decree, it is understood that it will terminate upon remarriage.

In other words - Your decree basically has to state that you agree to continue to pay alimony regardless of marriage by the payee spouse. If it does not, then you collect your proof and a file a motion to the courts. Once the motion is signed, you file it with probation.

And hey- go buy yourself a bottle of champagne and celebrate!!

 

[Pete_NJ]

My attorney is writing up the motion to stop it 'as of' the date of remarriage. And there in no clear indication in the judgment that alimony should or should not stop or continue. There is no mention of remarriage. It just states that I am to pay her permanent alimony. Therefore, since it just says I am to pay permanent alimony, the statute states...
If after the judgment of divorce a former spouse shall remarry, permanent and limited duration alimony shall terminate as of the date of remarriage...
Personally that is how I read it and my lawyer pretty much says the same thing. And I can collect my attorney fee from her to boot.

Champagne? I think more of a celebration then that.

 

[Bali Hai]

My attorney is writing up the motion to stop it 'as of' the date of remarriage. And there in no clear indication in the judgment that alimony should or should not stop or continue. There is no mention of remarriage. It just states that I am to pay her permanent alimony. Therefore, since it just says I am to pay permanent alimony, the statute states...
If after the judgment of divorce a former spouse shall remarry, permanent and limited duration alimony shall terminate as of the date of remarriage...
Personally that is how I read it and my lawyer pretty much says the same thing. And I can collect my attorney fee from her to boot.

Champagne? I think more of a celebration then that.

Please keep us informed.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

I agree with Pete_NJ.