Ex is moving out of state - do I still need to pay child support and maintenance?

[attila_c]

I live in Colorado, and I have been ordered to pay $1800 per month in maintenance and $330 per month in child support to my ex-wife.
However, she has recently indicated that she might be moving out of state without the child (i.e. leaving me with the child). While I don't have any issue with taking on the additional parenting responsibilities that this would entail, there is no way that I can financially support and take care of my 4-year-old child, while still paying my ex-wife maintenance and child support. I'm afraid that if she doesn't give me sufficient advance notice of this decision, I may not be able to take care of my child until the matter can be taken before a court. What is the quickest way to get some relief on maintenance and child support payments if my ex-wife relocates from the state for good and leaves me with the child?
As a side note, our child is autistic, and part of me ex's argument before the arbitrator was that she had to be a stay-at-home full-time mom to take care of our child. Thus she was awarded $1800 monthly maintenance. In addition, the $330 in child support was based on a 60/40 parenting time split, with me having our child 40% of the time. But now she's talking about leaving the state, and leaving me to care full time for our autistic child.
Finally, I would like to gain full custody of our child if she leaves the state. Would I need to hire a CFI, or because she left the state and the child, would this be a fairly simple matter before a judge?
Thanks in advance for the help.

 

[Silverplum]

I live in Colorado, and I have been ordered to pay $1800 per month in maintenance and $330 per month in child support to my ex-wife.
However, she has recently indicated that she might be moving out of state without the child (i.e. leaving me with the child). While I don't have any issue with taking on the additional parenting responsibilities that this would entail, there is no way that I can financially support and take care of my 4-year-old child, while still paying my ex-wife maintenance and child support. I'm afraid that if she doesn't give me sufficient advance notice of this decision, I may not be able to take care of my child until the matter can be taken before a court. What is the quickest way to get some relief on maintenance and child support payments if my ex-wife relocates from the state for good and leaves me with the child?
As a side note, our child is autistic, and part of me ex's argument before the arbitrator was that she had to be a stay-at-home full-time mom to take care of our child. Thus she was awarded $1800 monthly maintenance. In addition, the $330 in child support was based on a 60/40 parenting time split, with me having our child 40% of the time. But now she's talking about leaving the state, and leaving me to care full time for our autistic child.
Finally, I would like to gain full custody of our child if she leaves the state. Would I need to hire a CFI, or because she left the state and the child, would this be a fairly simple matter before a judge?
Thanks in advance for the help.

The smartest way to handle this, IMHO, is to wait. Wait till she's moved, wait till she's given you the child.

THEN file for full custody, request child support, request your support be ended. Include a reasonable long-distance parenting time schedule for Mom. You can find those at http://www.SPARC.net.

Was the alimony modifiable? Check your decree for the wording about modification.

 

[attila_c]

The smartest way to handle this, IMHO, is to wait. Wait till she's moved, wait till she's given you the child.

THEN file for full custody, request child support, request your support be ended. Include a reasonable long-distance parenting time schedule for Mom. You can find those at http://www.SPARC.net.

Was the alimony modifiable? Check your decree for the wording about modification.

thank you.

the arbitration award is silent on whether it's modifiable. I hope that means that a court could modify it.
but isn't there a quick injunction or something that could be put in place right away until we get in front of a court? unfortunately the courts here in Colorado are really backed up, and I'm worried it may be months before we could get before a judge.

 

[Silverplum]

thank you.

the arbitration award is silent on whether it's modifiable. I hope that means that a court could modify it.
but isn't there a quick injunction or something that could be put in place right away until we get in front of a court? unfortunately the courts here in Colorado are really backed up, and I'm worried it may be months before we could get before a judge.

The only thing I can suggest is to request an emergency hearing, once you have the child in your home.

Link to CO modification of alimony forms and instructions:
http://www.courts.state.co.us/Forms/Forms_List.cfm?Form_Type_ID=71

Link to CO modification of child support forms and instructions:
http://www.courts.state.co.us/Forms/Forms_List.cfm?Form_Type_ID=70

Link to CO modification of parental responsibilities:
http://www.courts.state.co.us/Forms/Forms_List.cfm?Form_Type_ID=72

 

[attila_c]

thank you for your help!

 

[Silverplum]

thank you for your help!

You're quite welcome!

I also URGE you to not rely solely upon the "advice" of a person on the internet, though I do have good intentions . DO take advantage of your yellow pages and look up family law attorneys, and make an appointment with one or two that offer free consultations. Make a list of questions and bring them along.

 

[attila_c]

I did talk to an attorney, and his advice was basically to wait until she moves, and then file a motion with the court to recalculate child support. I would be able to stop paying her child support immediately, and based on the calculations for the changed circumstances, deduct the amount of child support she would owe me from my maintenance payment. eventually maintenance would have to be re-calculated too based on the changed circumstances, but that would have to be done by the court. but as far as child support, that could be implemented immediately. it certainly wouldn't result in any financial benefit to me, as I would be spending more than the child support on day care alone, but at least I would be able to afford it - i.e. financially feasible.

 

[Silverplum]

I did talk to an attorney, and his advice was basically to wait until she moves, and then file a motion with the court to recalculate child support. I would be able to stop paying her child support immediately, and based on the calculations for the changed circumstances, deduct the amount of child support she would owe me from my maintenance payment. eventually maintenance would have to be re-calculated too based on the changed circumstances, but that would have to be done by the court. but as far as child support, that could be implemented immediately. it certainly wouldn't result in any financial benefit to me, as I would be spending more than the child support on day care alone, but at least I would be able to afford it - i.e. financially feasible.

Excellent! Good luck to you.

 

[attila_c]

Excellent! Good luck to you.

thank you!

 

[ecmst12]

You wouldn't be able to stop paying IMMEDIATELY (as in upon filing). You would be able to stop paying as of when you get a new court order. Until then you have to follow the existing order.