Lifetime Alimony 25+ years later: PLEASE HELP!!!!

[lifetime]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

25+ years ago I stupidly signed a support order that said lifetime. A YEAR AFTER our divorce, the state redefined lifetime to be 15 years. I have been paying her over 25 years. My business became less profitable about 10 years ago and ex agreed (verbally) to receive lower payments. Well, 2 months ago she hired an attorney to sue me for back pay of alimony for the difference!
She has never remarried and wants to live off of my support. My industry has taken a huge hit and I barely make enough to pay MY bills.
After 25 years of payments (on time) and the fact that the law changed the year after our divorce, is there ANY way to be grand-fathered in that definition of lifetime???? I do not have the $25k she's asking for! And the fact that she's received alimony all these years and is now suing me has me crazed!!!! I am 70 years old and had dreams of trying to retire at some point, which is hard to do without having to deal with her.
Anything I can do??
Thank you.

 

[cyjeff]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

25+ years ago I stupidly signed a support order that said lifetime. A YEAR AFTER our divorce, the state redefined lifetime to be 15 years. I have been paying her over 25 years. My business became less profitable about 10 years ago and ex agreed (verbally) to receive lower payments. Well, 2 months ago she hired an attorney to sue me for back pay of alimony for the difference!
She has never remarried and wants to live off of my support. My industry has taken a huge hit and I barely make enough to pay MY bills.
After 25 years of payments (on time) and the fact that the law changed the year after our divorce, is there ANY way to be grand-fathered in that definition of lifetime???? I do not have the $25k she's asking for! And the fact that she's received alimony all these years and is now suing me has me crazed!!!! I am 70 years old and had dreams of trying to retire at some point, which is hard to do without having to deal with her.
Anything I can do??
Thank you.

You could go back to court to renegotiate.

However, that doesn't change what you owe.

 

[LdiJ]

I also doubt that "lifetime support" has been redefined by the legislature as 15 years. You may be getting inaccurate and/or confused info there. I am not saying that there may not be a law out there that has to do with spousal support and 15 years, it just may not be exactly what you think it is.

 

[Bali Hai]

I also doubt that "lifetime support" has been redefined by the legislature as 15 years. You may be getting inaccurate and/or confused info there. I am not saying that there may not be a law out there that has to do with spousal support and 15 years, it just may not be exactly what you think it is.

I agree with this answer. The only hope this OP has is that the ex dies and SOON!!

 

[LdiJ]

I agree with this answer. The only hope this OP has is that the ex dies and SOON!!

I doubt that even the OP wishes that.

 

[InsaneJane]

It might not be a bad time to go back to court.
Your 70 and don't have the ability to pay what you used to. Plain and simple.
She agreed to and accepted less $ without going to court. You point is the amount was unfair and it was going to jepordize your ability to keep making the future payments.
Now with the economy the way it is and your age and health, it is not fair for you to have to pay support any longer.
Probably won't make her lawyer happy. Specially if you mention that the business is pulling you towards seeking protection from your creditors.

 

[asking12345]

Follow up question...

thanks everyone. Seems I can't find any lawyer who says that there is any way to modify or do a new alimony agreement.
Is there a way I can sue in Civil Court for something since, isn't it true that since she endorsed the reduced alimony payments for the last 5 years that it's an agreement to accept the lower payments???? So is there anything I can sue HER for??
Just grasping here. A lawyer told me that they can garnish my paycheck 55% until I am paid up and then of course to have to continue to pay.
I am tired of being a victim.

 

[LdiJ]

thanks everyone. Seems I can't find any lawyer who says that there is any way to modify or do a new alimony agreement.
Is there a way I can sue in Civil Court for something since, isn't it true that since she endorsed the reduced alimony payments for the last 5 years that it's an agreement to accept the lower payments???? So is there anything I can sue HER for??
Just grasping here. A lawyer told me that they can garnish my paycheck 55% until I am paid up and then of course to have to continue to pay.
I am tired of being a victim.

Ok...now you are saying that you arbitrarily reduced the alimony payments 5 years ago and the money she is going after is the arrearages? That is why she is asking for 25k now? If so, that was a serious mistake. You should have tried to file in court for a reduction rather than arbitrarily doing it yourself.

No, there is no possibility of retroactively reducing the payments. You might be able to get them reduced going forward, but not retroactively for the past 5 years.

You truly need an attorney and you need to be listening to said attorney.

 

[Ozark_Sophist]

Ok...now you are saying that you arbitrarily reduced the alimony payments 5 years ago and the money she is going after is the arrearages?

OP has said from the beginning spouse agreed to reduced alimony but is now coming back wanting the full amount.

 

[LdiJ]

OP has said from the beginning spouse agreed to reduced alimony but is now coming back wanting the full amount.

I missed that...I hate that when that happens. However, it apparently was only a verbal agreement, so that's going to be sticky.

 

[Bali Hai]

thanks everyone. Seems I can't find any lawyer who says that there is any way to modify or do a new alimony agreement.
Is there a way I can sue in Civil Court for something since, isn't it true that since she endorsed the reduced alimony payments for the last 5 years that it's an agreement to accept the lower payments???? So is there anything I can sue HER for??
Just grasping here. A lawyer told me that they can garnish my paycheck 55% until I am paid up and then of course to have to continue to pay.
I am tired of being a victim.

This is what happens when you get the right combination of religous fanatics and women elected to the legislature and judiciary.

The State of New York cleverly mandates that men be obligated to support women and the best way to accomplish this is to use the marriage contract.

You are going to have a VERY hard time finding an attorney to represent you, because it's just not the politically correct thing to do to take that poor woman's alimony away from her in this state. Judges who would attempt to do such a thing would find themselves tossed out of office when the woman's movement finished with them!!