Modification of Alimony Question

[Jessie0077]

What is the name of your state? Florida
My ex-husband of 30 years filed paperwork 2 years ago to have his alimony obligation modified. He refuses to provide discovery and has not paid me alimony of any kind in 7 months. I was informed by my attorney that I cannot do anything ( request an emergency hearing, etc) to enforce he pay the alimony. Basically my attorney is saying that the modification of alimony filing that he did exempts him from any legal action until the final hearing. Is this true? I am suffering without this money. Trying to survive on Social security is just not cutting it.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

He filed two years ago, and it still has not been heard?

 

[Gracie3787]

What is the name of your state? Florida
My ex-husband of 30 years filed paperwork 2 years ago to have his alimony obligation modified. He refuses to provide discovery and has not paid me alimony of any kind in 7 months. I was informed by my attorney that I cannot do anything ( request an emergency hearing, etc) to enforce he pay the alimony. Basically my attorney is saying that the modification of alimony filing that he did exempts him from any legal action until the final hearing. Is this true? I am suffering without this money. Trying to survive on Social security is just not cutting it.

Tell your attorney to file a motion for contempt for non payment. Also the attorney should file a motion to compel compliance with mandatory disclosure rule 12.285.

The only way that the existing court order cannot be enforced is:
1. The court has issued a stay on the order.
2. Your ex is in bankruptcy.

If neither of those are true, the order is completely enforceable.

 

[nextwife]

Do you know what his situation is? Is he ill, hospitalized, infirm, in a coma, something that would have interfered with both his ability to earn and his ability to assist in discovery? Sounds like he continued to pay you about a year and a half after requesting the hearing. Was that possibly from disability pay that has now run out?

What is your age? If you are having trouble making it in SS alone, have you considered working, even part time? My mom worked into her early 70s, part time. What is your plan if he can't work at some point and pay you alimony? Court order or not, when he can no longer pay alimony, you may want to consider the wisdom of having some of your own income..

 

[HaHaDonna]

He is at fault, not her!

Hi,
I am responding to the people who posted comments about this. You people have obviously not been through a divorce from a long term marriage. Telling her to just go work for her own money. And to his situation? He probalby has a new girlfriend that doesnt want him giving money to ex instead of her,lol!!!!!!! These days, I guess its different, but 25 , 30 years ago, women gave up the ideas of carreers to raise families and make life easier for the husband to make the money in the first place. Why should he go on making a bunch of money that she probably helped to get him there, while she has no qualifications at this stage of the game to earn an income that you can survive on.My ex hasnt paid in 7 months either, but has every toy and enjoys all the luxuries , while I live in a cottage with no luxuries and have to listen to him cry broke!

 

[Ohiogal]

Hi,
I am responding to the people who posted comments about this. You people have obviously not been through a divorce from a long term marriage.

You have no clue what we have or have not been through or our backgrounds.

Telling her to just go work for her own money.

Being financially independent is ALWAYS the best way.

And to his situation? He probalby has a new girlfriend that doesnt want him giving money to ex instead of her,lol!!!!!!!

Objection, facts not in evidence.

These days, I guess its different, but 25 , 30 years ago, women gave up the ideas of carreers to raise families and make life easier for the husband to make the money in the first place. Why should he go on making a bunch of money that she probably helped to get him there, while she has no qualifications at this stage of the game to earn an income that you can survive on.

Here is the thing -- you can NEVER rely on someone else to completely support you.

My ex hasnt paid in 7 months either, but has every toy and enjoys all the luxuries , while I live in a cottage with no luxuries and have to listen to him cry broke!

Yet you made a choice to do that. Not everyone 25/30 years ago decided to forfeit their independence to stay home. Some are financially independent today because of the choices THEY made.

 

[nextwife]

Not everyone 25/30 years ago decided to forfeit their independence to stay home. Some are financially independent today because of the choices THEY made.

That's for sure.

I'm 53, and I'm the young one amoungst our friends. Most of our them are in their 50s and 60s, and virtually NONE of the women forfeited their career capability, and all are financially capable and savvy. Same with my sis's friends, who are all about 10 years younger.

And I remember my mom, after a great many years as a SAHM, back in the mid 70s, going out and getting a job after dad got sick. If one needs money, why wouldn't they work? Why wouldn't they want to discover what they were capable of doing in the workforce - after all, once kiddos are grown, why is there still any need to stay home?

PS_ People DO get sick, disabled and die. Statistically, the odds are VERY high he will die BEFORE she, thus failing to plan accordingly is FOOLISH.

WHY is it ILLOGICAL to ask IF, after supporting her all those years, he is perhaps now ill, and himself in need of support? People our age DO get sick, and do lose jobs, and do even find themselves earning LESS money. That has happened with many people we know. And they should not be made out to be the bad guy for something they MAY have no control over.

 

[Bali Hai]

That's for sure.

I'm 53, and I'm the young one amoungst our friends. Most of our them are in their 50s and 60s, and virtually NONE of the women forfeited their career capability, and all are financially capable and savvy. Same with my sis's friends, who are all about 10 years younger.

And I remember my mom, after a great many years as a SAHM, back in the mid 70s, going out and getting a job after dad got sick. If one needs money, why wouldn't they work?

Why work when you can get the court to order someone else to support you???

Why wouldn't they want to discover what they were capable of doing in the workforce - after all, once kiddos are grown, why is there still any need to stay home?

Because they are lazy??

PS_ People DO get sick, disabled and die. Statistically, the odds are VERY high he will die BEFORE she, thus failing to plan accordingly is FOOLISH.

She has most likely developed a "contingency plan" should that happen, i.e. marrying another sucker!!

WHY is it ILLOGICAL to ask IF, after supporting her all those years, he is perhaps now ill, and himself in need of support?

To ask that question, the asker would have to give a rats @ss about HIS well being!!

People our age DO get sick, and do lose jobs, and do even find themselves earning LESS money. That has happened with many people we know. And they should not be made out to be the bad guy for something they MAY have no control over.

Your point is that women and the courts need to face the real world when making stupid requests and idiot decisions regarding alimony. It AIN'T going to happen without some FORCEFUL convincing!!