My Husband left, I need Spousal suport+ child support

[vale]

What is the name of your state? NJ
I' been married for 3 years and a half. have a 3 years old daughter. My husband and I had a fight and he decided to leave. He left 2 months ago and now refuses to continue to pay for rent and the utility bills as he used to do it when he lived here. He only wants to give me 300 a month for child support. He works for a union but they almost never have work for him, most of the time he is getting unemployment checks and sometimes he works with some friend. He is stating that he does not work and he is not allow to work for nobody else but union, and he told me that i cannot prove he works for his friend. I always work and pay my part of the bills but now I am strugling because many payments are not being done and utility services are going to be shut off. We are scheduled for court in 2 weeks. He also wants toget visitations twice a week and a full weekend every other week which I don't agree because he drinks too much. He was verbal abuser + always wants to have control of every decision for that reason we are not going back together. I am requesting spousal support so that I can pay the bills, it would around 750 a month, and i am requesting child support too. Is it going to be possible to get even if he is not working? I am almost sure he has a lawyer. I can't afford one, is there any help to get an attorney for low income people in NJ?What is the name of your state?

[ceara19]

Originally Posted by vale

What is the name of your state? NJ
I' been married for 3 years and a half. have a 3 years old daughter. My husband and I had a fight and he decided to leave. He left 2 months ago and now refuses to continue to pay for rent and the utility bills as he used to do it when he lived here. He only wants to give me 300 a month for child support. He works for a union but they almost never have work for him, most of the time he is getting unemployment checks and sometimes he works with some friend. He is stating that he does not work and he is not allow to work for nobody else but union, and he told me that i cannot prove he works for his friend. I always work and pay my part of the bills but now I am strugling because many payments are not being done and utility services are going to be shut off. We are scheduled for court in 2 weeks. He also wants toget visitations twice a week and a full weekend every other week which I don't agree because he drinks too much. He was verbal abuser + always wants to have control of every decision for that reason we are not going back together. I am requesting spousal support so that I can pay the bills, it would around 750 a month, and i am requesting child support too. Is it going to be possible to get even if he is not working? I am almost sure he has a lawyer. I can't afford one, is there any help to get an attorney for low income people in NJ?What is the name of your state?

I seriously doubt that you will be awarded ANY spousal support for such a short marriage. You are entitled to child support (IF you are awarded primary custody) and dad is entitled to have a relationship with his child. Unless you can PROVE that he is a danger to the child, you won't stop him from getting parenting time. If you can't afford the home you are currently in, it's time to start looking for a better job or a cheaper place to live.

[Ohiogal]

OP Ceara is correct. The question is ARE YOU WORKING? If not it is time for you to start. You cannot expect him to support you while you sit at home.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by vale

What is the name of your state? NJ
I' been married for 3 years and a half. have a 3 years old daughter. My husband and I had a fight and he decided to leave. He left 2 months ago and now refuses to continue to pay for rent and the utility bills as he used to do it when he lived here. He only wants to give me 300 a month for child support. He works for a union but they almost never have work for him, most of the time he is getting unemployment checks and sometimes he works with some friend. He is stating that he does not work and he is not allow to work for nobody else but union, and he told me that i cannot prove he works for his friend. I always work and pay my part of the bills but now I am strugling because many payments are not being done and utility services are going to be shut off. We are scheduled for court in 2 weeks. He also wants toget visitations twice a week and a full weekend every other week which I don't agree because he drinks too much. He was verbal abuser + always wants to have control of every decision for that reason we are not going back together. I am requesting spousal support so that I can pay the bills, it would around 750 a month, and i am requesting child support too. Is it going to be possible to get even if he is not working? I am almost sure he has a lawyer. I can't afford one, is there any help to get an attorney for low income people in NJ?What is the name of your state?

I am sorry, but spousal support really isn't realistic in this circumstance. You have a short term marriage and a spouse who apparently has very little provable income. You also may not get more in child support than he is currently offering.

If you haven't already done so, apply for some state assistance (foodstamps, tanif, medicaid, wic) to help get you through this period....but you are probably going to have to downsize.

[nextwife]

I also agree about trimming your bills. If his income has been minimal all along, it sounds like the $750 per month you claim is his half of the bills, indicates way too much spending for the income you describe. Both you and he are responsible for supporting the child you have together, and a 36 month marriage will NOT result in spousal support, so you also need to return to self sufficiency.

[vale]

I continue to work and keep looking for a better job. We live in a rented apartment, it is too expensive for me. I need to get temporary spousal support to afford the expenses that are over my budget living without him. I just need some time to adjust to a single life. He didn't care about bills and basic services that we need to live OK. I don't pretend to get money from him for ever. I just think it is not fair that he left to live at his mom's house where he does not have to do any efford to work. He doesn't care that his daughter lives still here, and if the gas gets shut off we are going to be in a cold apartment or won't be able to cook. I can't just move right now because I would need extra money the security deposit and moving expenses. I am representing myself in court and need to tell the judge all these. I know it is going to be tough but I have to try.

[Bali Hai]

Originally Posted by vale

I continue to work and keep looking for a better job. We live in a rented apartment, it is too expensive for me. I need to get temporary spousal support to afford the expenses that are over my budget living without him. I just need some time to adjust to a single life. He didn't care about bills and basic services that we need to live OK. I don't pretend to get money from him for ever. I just think it is not fair that he left to live at his mom's house where he does not have to do any efford to work. He doesn't care that his daughter lives still here, and if the gas gets shut off we are going to be in a cold apartment or won't be able to cook. I can't just move right now because I would need extra money the security deposit and moving expenses. I am representing myself in court and need to tell the judge all these. I know it is going to be tough but I have to try.

Okay, YOU maried the bum, has your original question changed??

[ceara19]

Originally Posted by vale

I continue to work and keep looking for a better job. We live in a rented apartment, it is too expensive for me. I need to get temporary spousal support to afford the expenses that are over my budget living without him. I just need some time to adjust to a single life. He didn't care about bills and basic services that we need to live OK. I don't pretend to get money from him for ever. I just think it is not fair that he left to live at his mom's house where he does not have to do any efford to work. He doesn't care that his daughter lives still here, and if the gas gets shut off we are going to be in a cold apartment or won't be able to cook. I can't just move right now because I would need extra money the security deposit and moving expenses. I am representing myself in court and need to tell the judge all these. I know it is going to be tough but I have to try.

Here's the thing, you don't think it's "fair" that you are forced to cut your expenses or come up with the money to stay where you are and he will argue that it's not "fair" to force him to pay bills for a residence that he no longer lives in. If the child is living with you, you need to file for temporary custody and child support. If your husband is barely working as it is, there's little chance of actually COLLECTING any spousal support IF you could even manage to convince the Judge to order it in such a short marriage, which itself is highly unlikely.