Need some advice

[doh!]

What is the name of your state? Arkansas

I was married for a little over two years. During most of the marriage I was the only one that worked, my wife could not keep a job and did not put much effort into getting a job and made up alot of excuses as to why she did not get a job. We got into an argument and I packed my things and left to stay with my mom. Before I left, she told me to let my mom know that I need to stay one night with her, she told me that she would call me the next day to let me know when we could talk rationally. The next day, I received a phone call from her, that I need to come by the house.
Upon arriving, she proceeds to gather more belongings of mine and told me that she has moved on and that she slept with another man [it was evident with two large hickies on her neck and plus the other man was in the living room ].
It has been very hard on me these past few weeks. Since then she has told me to come home, I've been on a fence about this. On the one side I did not want to return based on the hardship I had with just me working and that she was unfaithful in marriage and on the other, part of me wanted to. But now, I have decided that I want a divorce. I am not sure where I stand concerning alimony. Will I have to pay it or not consiering that even with me not there, she has not put much effort into getting employment.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by doh!

What is the name of your state? Arkansas

I was married for a little over two years. During most of the marriage I was the only one that worked, my wife could not keep a job and did not put much effort into getting a job and made up alot of excuses as to why she did not get a job. We got into an argument and I packed my things and left to stay with my mom. Before I left, she told me to let my mom know that I need to stay one night with her, she told me that she would call me the next day to let me know when we could talk rationally. The next day, I received a phone call from her, that I need to come by the house.
Upon arriving, she proceeds to gather more belongings of mine and told me that she has moved on and that she slept with another man [it was evident with two large hickies on her neck and plus the other man was in the living room ].
It has been very hard on me these past few weeks. Since then she has told me to come home, I've been on a fence about this. On the one side I did not want to return based on the hardship I had with just me working and that she was unfaithful in marriage and on the other, part of me wanted to. But now, I have decided that I want a divorce. I am not sure where I stand concerning alimony. Will I have to pay it or not consiering that even with me not there, she has not put much effort into getting employment.

Unless she is disabled in some way and it happened during the marriage, there is virtually no chance that you would be required to pay any kind of alimony. Your marriage was simply too short for alimony to be an issue.

You may have to face some property/debt division. If there is a child or children you will have to deal with that.

[dallas702]

Let's see: you walked out on her because she wouldn't or couldn't get/hold a job? You certainly aren't going to get any sympathy from any judge, but alimony would be unusual unless (as Ldij said) she is disabled. Or, if she gave up some school/training/opportunity to marry you, and needs to start over. In most states the infidelity won't be much of a factor, and you don't have proof that she was already seeing this other bum.

Actually, in some states you could sue the bum and get damages for ruining your marriage, but he probably doesn't have a nickle to give. If you want to get even with him encourage him to marry your soon-to-be ex. Stop even thinking about getting her back. Move on and learn your lesson.

I am still amazed that you think her not working was such a big deal that you left. Does that mean you can't support yourself (went back to mom's). What the heck are you doing marrying anyone? Build your own life before you try to build a marriage. God help the child if she is pregnant.

[doh!]

Originally Posted by dallas702

Let's see: you walked out on her because she wouldn't or couldn't get/hold a job? You certainly aren't going to get any sympathy from any judge, but alimony would be unusual unless (as Ldij said) she is disabled. Or, if she gave up some school/training/opportunity to marry you, and needs to start over. In most states the infidelity won't be much of a factor, and you don't have proof that she was already seeing this other bum.

Actually, in some states you could sue the bum and get damages for ruining your marriage, but he probably doesn't have a nickle to give. If you want to get even with him encourage him to marry your soon-to-be ex. Stop even thinking about getting her back. Move on and learn your lesson.

I am still amazed that you think her not working was such a big deal that you left. Does that mean you can't support yourself (went back to mom's). What the heck are you doing marrying anyone? Build your own life before you try to build a marriage. God help the child if she is pregnant.

There was more to it than her lack of obtaining anf keeping a job, I only stated the problem in summary form. I will seek to sue "the bum". What I have found out, he does work and own a vehicle, he has a girlfriend. Upon discovering that he already had a girlfriend, my soon-be-ex-wife told him that he was no longer welcomed at the house, it was a few days later when she would call me and giving me the sob story of her missing me, blah blah. So yeah, he does have money, if it is possible to sue him, at least his girlfriend will find out how much of a man he really is destroying a marriage by sleeping with someone's wife.

I am curious about encouraging him to marry my so-called wife, could you explain this to me?

[nextwife]

Just get OUT of the marriage. NOW, because, as stated, there is virtually no chance of alimony when the marriage is so short. You don't need to discuss her unwillingness to share in the cost of running the household (if she has no kids at home, there is no reason she has to be home).

The adultery (and in your own home, yet) is good enough reason to get out! Not only adultery, but flaunting it in your face. She's a bum and a low life, dump her.

[stealth2]

Arkansas does not allow for alienation of affection suits, so you're not going to get anywhere with that. Even if you were, you would find that it is a very expensive and dirty fight - you would have to prove that the sole reason for the breakdown of your marriage was his interference. Every corner or your life would be fair game for being brought to light - and I mean EVERY.

[doh!]

Well, I just found out that "the male slut" is homeless and lives a random shelters. I'll just leave that alone. Thank you all.

[dallas702]

Ouch!

Seriously, better luck with the next one.