Pension payouts

[OldPensioner]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL

My divorce agreement from 15 years ago states my former spouse and I will share my pension equally. It doesn't say how to split it or when or any other details.
I have been collecting it for 14 years, with no payments to the former spouse by verbal agreement. (I had custody of the children with no child support order.)
Since then, the former spouse has remarried, began a business, been self-supporting.
Now I am being sued for monthly payments.
What is the general consensus on old cases like this? Will I be held to the original agreement? What are my best arguments against it?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by OldPensioner

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL

My divorce agreement from 15 years ago states my former spouse and I will share my pension equally. It doesn't say how to split it or when or any other details.
I have been collecting it for 14 years, with no payments to the former spouse by verbal agreement. (I had custody of the children with no child support order.)
Since then, the former spouse has remarried, began a business, been self-supporting.
Now I am being sued for monthly payments.
What is the general consensus on old cases like this? Will I be held to the original agreement? What are my best arguments against it?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Is this a military pension? If so, that was part of the property settlement, not alimony and yes, you WILL be held to the original agreement. If the ex wants to get snarky, you could even be held responsible for all of the years that you did not pay.

[Bali Hai]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

Is this a military pension? If so, that was part of the property settlement, not alimony and yes, you WILL be held to the original agreement. If the ex wants to get snarky, you could even be held responsible for all of the years that you did not pay.

Let me see, for 14 years the ex AGREED and acquiesced not to receive the payments.

14 years later she comes before a judge and wants arrearages?

Guess what she would be told at the discretion of the Honorable Bali Hai??

[OldPensioner]

Thank you both for your responses. Two sides to every story, I see.

It's not a military pension. It's a private plan from a family business. Understandably, the family is upset that we were only married 9 years when the kids and I were abandoned, but the time it took to get the divorce puts us at 10 years on paper.

I know I'm too subjective, but ethically it seems wrong that someone can come along so late (now at my second retirement time) and make a claim for something I brought to the marriage and didn't begin collecting on until after we were divorced -meaning there's no "lifestyle to which one has become accustomed."

[Proserpina]

Unfortunately it's the verbal agreement which might bury you here; it's worth less than the air in which it was spoken. I know retrospect is 20/20 vision but yes, that should've been filed with the court.

(seniors? Is there a statute of limitations OP could use?)

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by OldPensioner

Thank you both for your responses. Two sides to every story, I see.

Bali's advice wasn't accurate legal advice. That's just the way that he thinks things should be.

It's not a military pension. It's a private plan from a family business. Understandably, the family is upset that we were only married 9 years when the kids and I were abandoned, but the time it took to get the divorce puts us at 10 years on paper.

I know I'm too subjective, but ethically it seems wrong that someone can come along so late (now at my second retirement time) and make a claim for something I brought to the marriage and didn't begin collecting on until after we were divorced -meaning there's no "lifestyle to which one has become accustomed."

I don't understand why you didn't fight that out at the time you were divorcing. However, it was either ordered by a judge in the divorce, or you agreed to it, and its a legally binding order.

Also, the amount of the pension that accrued during your marriage was a valid marital asset to be divided...even if you didn't start collecting on it until after your divorce. You are looking at it as if its alimony/spousal support when in reality it was a division of a marital asset.

[Gracie3787]

Originally Posted by OldPensioner

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL

My divorce agreement from 15 years ago states my former spouse and I will share my pension equally. It doesn't say how to split it or when or any other details.
I have been collecting it for 14 years, with no payments to the former spouse by verbal agreement. (I had custody of the children with no child support order.)
Since then, the former spouse has remarried, began a business, been self-supporting.
Now I am being sued for monthly payments.
What is the general consensus on old cases like this? Will I be held to the original agreement? What are my best arguments against it?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

You might have a good case for the defense of laches.
For the best advice you should get a consult with an attorney to see what your options are. You can get a low cost consult by calling the Florida Bar Lawyer Referral Service at 1-800-342-8011.

[garrula lingua]

OP:
Your ex, or his/her atty, should have done a QDRO (Qualified Domestic Relations Order) at the time (or shortly thereafter) of the divorce.

Without a QDRO signed by the Judge, the pension plan could not delegate that specific portion of your retirement. The formula should have been based on the period of marriage (eg 9 yrs) of your entire pension (so, if you worked 27 yrs, ex would own 1/2 of 1/3 of your retirement).

I would say the ball is in ex's court: it is his/her responsibility to draft and submit to the divorce court an acceptable QDRO.

This is assuming that the Court ordered that ex should get 1/2 of your pension which accrued during the marriage, in the divorce decree.

You may/may not be liable for monies which were not directed to him/her.
Ex may have a malpractice case against ex's divorce attorney in the amt of any monies lost. It's common for the atty to do the QDRO or state specifically in the fee agreement that the QDRO is not included in the services.

Google QDRO. Even if that was a family business, they should be under ERISA laws and have to follow the requirements of receipt of a court-ordered QDRO.