Nevada
Hey Folks,
So my spouse and I are getting divorced.
Without my knowledge, she went out and retained an attorney thinking that I would not contest anything she asked for in the settlement.
Attorney sends me a letter that has an alimony settlement that made my eyes bug out of my head. I had asked repeatedly over 3 weeks for us to stay friends and mediate.
She had other plans.
Spoke to one attorney who said that the alimony was too high and she would not get it if it went to trial. (didn't like this attorney as she seemed far too aggressive and I didn't want that)
Went to and retained a second attorney who was much more level and he also said the alimony demand was ridiculous and there is no way she would receive it in a trial.
So now I have two attorney's in agreement that the alimony demand is far too high.
Her attorney created a demand based on information from his client. This information was bad as she believed I wouldn't contest anything.
She told me prior to me seeing the letter that he said he wouldn't "tap me out". Those were her exact words.
We have just had our hearing and a trial date has been set.
We agreed to joint custody of my under age of majority son
I have agreed to make payments to match her attorney fees to mine so level ground.
We are still living together in the same residence and I guess we will be for the foreseeable future.
We have agreed to see a mediator and this is where my question comes from
She is locked into this high dollar amount and I would believe that her attorney is not going to advise her to take any less now.
My attorney is 100% certain that she would never get this in a trial but being a good attorney, he told me there is always risks.
The difference between what he feels she is entitled to and what she is asking for is a pretty big difference.
I even talked to him about just coming up to get closer to her demands to end this quickly and he advised me not to do that.
He stated that everything is connected in a divorce settlement and we need to stand our ground. I do believe him
So my real question based on all of this is "is doing mediation a waste of time and money at this point"?
She already has a number in her head based on her attorney and her divorced friend that she likes to speak from.
I already have a number (although I feel more negotiable ) which is lower than what she is asking for.
So I would be ready to negotiate but I don't have the highest confidence that she would.
I believe if we had mediated from the beginning, she would already have her divorce and we would both be off building new lives.
As it stands now, this is going to drag on for many months until the trial
Does anyone have experience with a contested divorce actually being able to mediate an outcome?
Seems to me that once both sides have dug in their heels, this is a fruitless exercise.
Hey Folks,
So my spouse and I are getting divorced.
Without my knowledge, she went out and retained an attorney thinking that I would not contest anything she asked for in the settlement.
Attorney sends me a letter that has an alimony settlement that made my eyes bug out of my head. I had asked repeatedly over 3 weeks for us to stay friends and mediate.
She had other plans.
Spoke to one attorney who said that the alimony was too high and she would not get it if it went to trial. (didn't like this attorney as she seemed far too aggressive and I didn't want that)
Went to and retained a second attorney who was much more level and he also said the alimony demand was ridiculous and there is no way she would receive it in a trial.
So now I have two attorney's in agreement that the alimony demand is far too high.
Her attorney created a demand based on information from his client. This information was bad as she believed I wouldn't contest anything.
She told me prior to me seeing the letter that he said he wouldn't "tap me out". Those were her exact words.
We have just had our hearing and a trial date has been set.
We agreed to joint custody of my under age of majority son
I have agreed to make payments to match her attorney fees to mine so level ground.
We are still living together in the same residence and I guess we will be for the foreseeable future.
We have agreed to see a mediator and this is where my question comes from
She is locked into this high dollar amount and I would believe that her attorney is not going to advise her to take any less now.
My attorney is 100% certain that she would never get this in a trial but being a good attorney, he told me there is always risks.
The difference between what he feels she is entitled to and what she is asking for is a pretty big difference.
I even talked to him about just coming up to get closer to her demands to end this quickly and he advised me not to do that.
He stated that everything is connected in a divorce settlement and we need to stand our ground. I do believe him
So my real question based on all of this is "is doing mediation a waste of time and money at this point"?
She already has a number in her head based on her attorney and her divorced friend that she likes to speak from.
I already have a number (although I feel more negotiable ) which is lower than what she is asking for.
So I would be ready to negotiate but I don't have the highest confidence that she would.
I believe if we had mediated from the beginning, she would already have her divorce and we would both be off building new lives.
As it stands now, this is going to drag on for many months until the trial
Does anyone have experience with a contested divorce actually being able to mediate an outcome?
Seems to me that once both sides have dug in their heels, this is a fruitless exercise.