She wants alimony

[deecopperpot]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

I AM writing for my brother. I am not the fiance or girlfriend. I am in a very happy relationship. You have helped me in the past so figure you could advise him. Bill was married 27 yrs; wife is an alcoholic, has had physical abuse to him, started a few businesses and they did not workout, she worked for a company for 8 years until they left town and has not worked since. He is staying with friends and she is in the house which is for sale. The kids are grown and out of the house and he was recently layed off and is making $146 on unemployment. He also has no retirement but he is a nice guy. He is going to court on the 20th as his soon to be ex wants alimony. She has a lawyer to represent her (which he will have to pay) and he cannot afford one so going to represent himself. If he has no money, can they make him pay? He has sold off all his assets (toys) as he has been paying the house payment directly to the bank. He thinks he will not have to pay but I do not trust the courts. He is basically waiting for the house to sell and he will split it with her.Any advice or thoughts?

[Zigner]

I think your brother needs an attorney.

Beyond that, you haven't asked a specific legal question...how can we give an answer?

[Bali Hai]

Originally Posted by deecopperpot

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

I AM writing for my brother. I am not the fiance or girlfriend. I am in a very happy relationship. You have helped me in the past so figure you could advise him. Bill was married 27 yrs; wife is an alcoholic, has had physical abuse to him, started a few businesses and they did not workout, she worked for a company for 8 years until they left town and has not worked since. He is staying with friends and she is in the house which is for sale. The kids are grown and out of the house and he was recently layed off and is making $146 on unemployment. He also has no retirement but he is a nice guy. He is going to court on the 20th as his soon to be ex wants alimony. She has a lawyer to represent her (which he will have to pay) and he cannot afford one so going to represent himself. If he has no money, can they make him pay? He has sold off all his assets (toys) as he has been paying the house payment directly to the bank. He thinks he will not have to pay but I do not trust the courts. He is basically waiting for the house to sell and he will split it with her.Any advice or thoughts?

My guess is that poor Bill will not walk away from a 27 year NY marriage without paying alimony. It's "traditional".

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by deecopperpot

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

I AM writing for my brother. I am not the fiance or girlfriend. I am in a very happy relationship. You have helped me in the past so figure you could advise him. Bill was married 27 yrs; wife is an alcoholic, has had physical abuse to him, started a few businesses and they did not workout, she worked for a company for 8 years until they left town and has not worked since. He is staying with friends and she is in the house which is for sale. The kids are grown and out of the house and he was recently layed off and is making $146 on unemployment. He also has no retirement but he is a nice guy.

I'm only going to touch on the abuse issue. Does your brother have police reports or other evidence which would show his ex was abusive? This could make a very important difference.

[deecopperpot]

No Bill never filed any police reports. His daughter did see a black eye once and his ex just recently had been arrested for hitting her new boyfriend.

My legal quesiton was...if you do not HAVE the money what will the judge expect him to pay alimony with?

His ex wife has worked here and there but lost her jobs due to drinking. She is only 45 and able bodied to work. What she is doing for spending money is selling things on ebay.

Would it help if Bill claimed he has paid his shared as he raised her daughter (prior relationship) and her nephew from the age of 3 with no child support from anyone and made sure they graduated ftom college. Does paying in other ways perhaps make the judge see that he is a fair man and time for the wife to stand up.

His money right now goes to pay the house payment and utilities and his rent.

Thanks for the replies.

[Bali Hai]

Originally Posted by deecopperpot

No Bill never filed any police reports. His daughter did see a black eye once and his ex just recently had been arrested for hitting her new boyfriend.

My legal quesiton was...if you do not HAVE the money what will the judge expect him to pay alimony with?

His ex wife has worked here and there but lost her jobs due to drinking. She is only 45 and able bodied to work. What she is doing for spending money is selling things on ebay.

Would it help if Bill claimed he has paid his shared as he raised her daughter (prior relationship) and her nephew from the age of 3 with no child support from anyone and made sure they graduated ftom college. Does paying in other ways perhaps make the judge see that he is a fair man and time for the wife to stand up.

His money right now goes to pay the house payment and utilities and his rent.

Thanks for the replies.

I will point out that your thinking on this issue is exactly opposite what the court's decision will be.

Since Bill is the responsible one and has been the provider, he will continue in that role, possibly for life.

[deecopperpot]

I hear you.... I will tell him to bring in copies of his assets (bank stmts etc) and a copies of his liabilities (house mortgage, credit card bills) as well as a list of his monthly expenses and income. I am sure her lawyer will have her list. Lastly I will have him emphasize that she has been working (her choice of jobs)...just in the house selling on ebay and babysitting her grandchildren for money. Everytime he would suggest she get a job outside of the house there would be a huge fight.

Thanks for your help.