Should I try for support

[Kpetro1973]

What is the name of your state? Washington
I have been married for 5 years- I left my husband 2 weeks before christmas because he has become more and more violent- he is an alcoholic. I have to children (previous) marriage was supporting them by bartending while I was going to school. After I got married I was not longer eligible for financial aid due to his income. I now have $35000 in debt for college that was incurred since we got together. I also have $5600 dollars of orthodontic bills for my children that we both agreed to take on and in August leased a $27000 suv for transportation. He has a truck that we both got together and is almost paid off- due to both of us paying over the years. We both supported each other- he wanted me to stop bartending to go to school so he supported me for almost a year. There was several differnt time when he was off work that i supported him. Should I even think about asking for support or am I just basically screwed??

[nextwife]

Originally Posted by Kpetro1973

What is the name of your state? Washington
I have been married for 5 years- I left my husband 2 weeks before christmas because he has become more and more violent- he is an alcoholic. I have to children (previous) marriage was supporting them by bartending while I was going to school. After I got married I was not longer eligible for financial aid due to his income. I now have $35000 in debt for college that was incurred since we got together.

So you met your alchoholic husband tending bar perhaps?

Wouldn't have had college expense regardless? Weren't you going to college before you married him?

Was this a joint debt or your college tuition?

Originally Posted by Kpetro1973

I also have $5600 dollars of orthodontic bills for my children that we both agreed to take on and in August leased a $27000 suv for transportation.

Why are you not sharing orthodontia costs with the father of your children? Wouldn't your kids have needed that orthodontal work if you had never married your husband? I don't understand why you want a guy, not the kid's father, who you were married to a mere 5 years to be responibible for the orthodontal needs of YOUR kids.

The auto lease is a joint marital debt. (Although I don't understand why a family trying to finish school and incurring large orthopedic bills would want to take on payments on a $27,000 car)

Originally Posted by Kpetro1973

He has a truck that we both got together and is almost paid off- due to both of us paying over the years. We both supported each other- he wanted me to stop bartending to go to school so he supported me for almost a year. There was several differnt time when he was off work that i supported

Then you each gave each other time off. Seems even.

THe truck is a marital asset. You are each entitled to share marital assets and marital debts and share retirement account accrual that occured DURING the marriage.

Originally Posted by Kpetro1973

Should I even think about asking for support or am I just basically screwed??

Why would you not getting supported by him be "getting screwed"? You had a short term marriage, was probably able to get more of your education completed than you would have in that time frame if you had not married him.

[Bali Hai]

Originally Posted by nextwife

So you met your alchoholic husband tending bar perhaps?

Wouldn't have had college expense regardless? Weren't you going to college before you married him? I did when I was going to college. My sis went back to college a few years ago, and she had about twice the tuition you have to pay off herself.

Was this a joint debt or your college tuition?



Why are you not sharing orthodontia costs with the father of your children? Wouldn't your kids have needed that orthodontal work if you had never married your husband? I don't understand why you want a guy, not the kid's father, who you were married to a mere 5 years to be responibible for the orthodontal needs of YOUR kids.

The auto lease is a joint marital debt. (Although I don't understand why a family trying to finish school and incurring large orthopedic bills would want to take on payments on a $27,000 car)



Then you each gave each other time off. Seems even.

THe truck is a marital asset. You are each entitled to share marital assets and marital debts and share retirement account accrual that occured DURING the marriage.



Why would you not getting supported by him be "getting screwed"? You had a short term marriage, was probably able to get more of your education completed than you would have in that time frame if you had not married him.

Nextwife, people have been thrown off this site for making sense.

Just a reminder.

[moburkes]

Hi, Bali.

By the way, OP, I agree with nextwife. Your husband didn't become abusive in December, did he? Apparently, he was a violent alcoholic for awhile, so it was NOT a smart move to make these expensive financial decisions. Now you get to live with your actions. Think of it this way: Now you'll be eligible for financial aid.