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11-24-2008, 12:38 AM
| | Junior Member | | Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 7
| | | Where do i need to file...
MY "petition for modification of alimony"...my divorce was granted in Illinois and i am now a resident of Missouri...thanks for any advice you can give me... |
11-24-2008, 05:48 AM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 33,549
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by soulfulms  MY "petition for modification of alimony"...my divorce was granted in Illinois and i am now a resident of Missouri...thanks for any advice you can give me... | Where does the other party live? If its IL, then that is where you need to file.
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11-24-2008, 06:08 PM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 17,475
| | | So why are you only working 24 hrs a week?
Ex's acquisition of his father's company did not occur during the marriage?
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Adoptive parents ARE "real" parents. Sharing genes is not what makes you a "parent"!
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11-25-2008, 01:24 AM
| | Junior Member | | Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 7
| | | during my marriage i worked part-time...after the divorce, i tried working additional hours (i'm an RN)...i found that i could not keep up with the pace and stress...after my son died, i felt like i died...
i have been treated for depression for many years and this put me over the top...i work as much as i can...that's all i can say...my concentration abilities are not good and i work much slower than i used to...i have tried to piece together several part-time, low-stress positions to compensate and have limited my hospital work...
i am currently under the care of a therapist, but cannot afford to see him as much as i need to...i take medication and each year it becomes more difficult...
i thought i would be further along in the grieving process 5 years down the road, but i am not...that is why i need some advice...the process of modification will be stressful and i am not sure i can handle it...my ex-husband can afford to give his lawyer free rein and limit his involvment...i have to do much of the work myself and my divorce was a nightmare...the day of the final hearing was 2 months after brian died...please give me some advice...i know ultimately i must make the decision, but it helps to hear others give their views...thanks for asking...  |
11-25-2008, 10:34 AM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: CO
Posts: 13,127
| | Does your court order state that the alimony is modifiable? Or that it can be revisited?
It would be much easier to help if you could type, word-for-word, the section on alimony in your decree. But please leave out any identifying info, like names. 
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"Judges want people to be reasonable. Where one parent won't be reasonable, judges still want the other parent to remain reasonable." Ford, at The Other Place |
11-25-2008, 11:34 AM
| | Junior Member | | Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 7
| | | petitioner agrees to pay to and for the benefit of the respondent the following spousal support: commencing May 1, 2004 or earlier if the respondent vacates the centralia residence, petioner shall pay the sum of $1000 per month for sixty (60) months directly to the respondent. said maintenance shall automatically terminate upon the death of either party, upon the remarrriage of the respondent or in the event the respondent cohabits with another person on a resident, continuing basis.
the parties agree that said spousal support shall be modifiable at any time within said sixty (60) month payment period upon showing substantial change of circumstances as provided by statutory and case law. at the completion of the 60 month period, each party shall thereafter be forever barred from claiming any future maintenance from the other as it is the intent of the parties that maintenance shall only be paid for a maximum of 60 months, unless modified earlier. |
11-25-2008, 11:41 AM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: CO
Posts: 13,127
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by soulfulms petitioner agrees to pay to and for the benefit of the respondent the following spousal support: commencing May 1, 2004 or earlier if the respondent vacates the centralia residence, petioner shall pay the sum of $1000 per month for sixty (60) months directly to the respondent. said maintenance shall automatically terminate upon the death of either party, upon the remarrriage of the respondent or in the event the respondent cohabits with another person on a resident, continuing basis.
the parties agree that said spousal support shall be modifiable at any time within said sixty (60) month payment period upon showing substantial change of circumstances as provided by statutory and case law. at the completion of the 60 month period, each party shall thereafter be forever barred from claiming any future maintenance from the other as it is the intent of the parties that maintenance shall only be paid for a maximum of 60 months, unless modified earlier. | Thank you, that's perfect.
Next I am going to assume you have NOT filed to transfer the case to your current state, MO. If you have, let us know it was actually formally/legally transferred to MO.
Meanwhile, I (and others? Help from others would be good!) will look for info on statutes and/or case law for IL alimony modification.
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"Judges want people to be reasonable. Where one parent won't be reasonable, judges still want the other parent to remain reasonable." Ford, at The Other Place |
11-25-2008, 11:51 AM
| | Member | | Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Victorville, Ca.
Posts: 466
| | | Are there parts to this post that are missing? I see where one talks about working 24 hours of the week, but nothing referencing that in a previous post.
Has the 60 month term from the date of execution of that decree expired? How much time is left if it hasn't?
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The mouth speaks what the mind thinks.
You will get no "warm-fuzzy" from me.
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11-25-2008, 11:56 AM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: CO
Posts: 13,127
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by OldandTired Are there parts to this post that are missing? I see where one talks about working 24 hours of the week, but nothing referencing that in a previous post.
Has the 60 month term from the date of execution of that decree expired? How much time is left if it hasn't? | Multiple posts. Trying to gather into one.
May 09 expiration (6th post in this thread.)
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"Judges want people to be reasonable. Where one parent won't be reasonable, judges still want the other parent to remain reasonable." Ford, at The Other Place
Last edited by Silverplum; 11-25-2008 at 03:09 PM.
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11-25-2008, 12:00 PM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: CO
Posts: 13,127
| | | I've found this much, thus far:
[url=http://www.helpyourselfdivorce.com/illinois-alimony.html]Alimony Laws in Illinois[/url]
Item 8, in particular, may be helpful to you.
and
[url=http://www.illinoisdivorce.com/family_law_articles/maintenance_basics.php]Illinois Divorce - Maintenance Basics - Family Law Article[/url]
The section on "Rehabilitative Maintenance" may be helpful to you.
This part I've copied/pasted below shows that the burden to prove you still need maintenance is yours:
"Such awards stress the importance of the recipient's duty to rehabilitate and impose a burden of proof on the recipient to demonstrate why the rehabilitation failed and why maintenance should continue. Still, "reviewable" awards are much more common than awards for a specific time with a right to seek an extension.
Typical reviewable awards might be for two or three years, during which time the recipient spouse has a duty to try to become financially self-supporting. Near the end of that period, the court decides if the recipient is financially self-sufficient. If so, the rehabilitation is complete and maintenance terminates. If not, maintenance may continue but only according to the duration and restrictions set by the court. It is not uncommon in such a situation for the court to grant a relatively short (i.e., up to one-year) extension at a reduced monthly amount, and to make that extension non-reviewable with no further chance of renewal. If, however, the court concludes that the recipient spouse has not made a good faith effort at self-sufficiency, maintenance should immediately be terminated."
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"Judges want people to be reasonable. Where one parent won't be reasonable, judges still want the other parent to remain reasonable." Ford, at The Other Place |
11-25-2008, 02:29 PM
| | Junior Member | | Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 7
| | | i am so appreciative of you taking this on...i know the burden of proof is on me...i'm trying to figure out what i can prove...my non-marital assets have gone down about 10%; my therapist doesn't think i should waive my privacy rights to my psychological records; i didn't receive any of my ex's 401k; but was awarded my non-marital assets, which i've had to use the last 5 years to supplement my income; at the time of divorce there was a disparity of income...even if i worked 40 hrs/wk it still wouldn't come close to his and future earnings was never discussed by my attorney...
since the divorce ex has taken over ownership of a business
gotton an inheritance
your input is so important to me...pat |
11-25-2008, 02:59 PM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 21,751
| | | If you can't work due to your psychological state look for your ex to get a COURT ORDER requiring your psychological records be released. And you have a therapist? Do you have a PSYCHIATRIST that has deemed you cannot work? Was your son his son as well?
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Parents should remember two things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex (or soon to be ex) and when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death parts you.
Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship. My advice is based on the law and not deemed to necessarily apply to the specifics of your case. The devil is in the details after all. |
11-25-2008, 03:07 PM
| | Member | | Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Victorville, Ca.
Posts: 466
| | Quote:
since the divorce ex has taken over ownership of a business
gotton an inheritance
| Are you implying that you want to continue to, "get a little of this", and "get a little of that", every time your ex happens to be better off than you?
This isn't going to go on forever. If you're disabled, file with the SSA for SSDI. Your ex should not have to continue to care for you at a burdened expense to him.
I'm still curious as to how much time has passed since the order was signed by the Judge.
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The mouth speaks what the mind thinks.
You will get no "warm-fuzzy" from me.
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11-25-2008, 03:13 PM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: CO
Posts: 13,127
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by soulfulms since the divorce ex has taken over ownership of a business
gotton an inheritance | Those things are out of your reach, so to speak. They are his alone. Quote: |
Originally Posted by soulfulms your input is so important to me...pat |
No one can answer for you whether or not you are strong enough, or have enough cash, to fight this battle. You alone can answer those questions. But if your attorney is not truly on board, forget him/her and find a new one. If you can't find one, it means they all think your case is unwinnable.
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"Judges want people to be reasonable. Where one parent won't be reasonable, judges still want the other parent to remain reasonable." Ford, at The Other Place |
11-25-2008, 03:16 PM
| | Junior Member | | Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 7
| | | i am saying that i have a problem called depression...it makes it more difficult for me on all levels...i try to work at less-stress jobs in nursing...3 days in a hospital and fill in with health fairs, flu shots, insurance assessments...with that said...
my ex-husband is the father of my son who passed
i receive $1000/mo until april or may 2009
my maintenance is modifiable
i would like to continue my maintenance because i am having to use my "non-marital assests" to supplement my income
my ex made 4-5 xs the income i make when we were married
and now makes substantially more
i see a therapist, when i can afford to for the ongoing depression...it was present in my marriage
i don't know about a "court order" to get my records???
my ex was awarded his 401K and does not use it to supplement his income
my portfolio was "non-marital" his was marital, but non was awarded to me
thank you all for your input...please keep the remarks and questions and advice coming...i am trying to put this all together | |
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