Spousal Abuse cp 244 and 273.5(a)

[lilo342]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California
my husband found out that i had an affair and beat me up for four days and burned me (3rd degree burns on several spots on my body) while he was beating me. I finally managed to call the police and got him arrested but I bailed him out couple of hours later. now ten days later we know that he will be charged with 244 and 273.5a I had a restraining order against him but it expired 3 days ago and he want me to go to a lawyer in the same office as the lawyer he is using is that legal?? he is pushing me to call and go and to do any thing to get him out of this mess? but not sure if this is legal I mean I'm the victim here not him we also have two kids 2 and 6 years old
he is upset and want me to help him saying that it was my fault that all of this happened given that he is a well respected doctor in the community. Any thought or help would be appreciated
thanks

[hardtimesinMO]

ok im sorry but your dumb for bailing him out. what was the point in even calling the cops and it is not illegal for you to go with him to his lawyers if the restraining order is expired. if i was you i would just break contact with him until the court date. if you let him get away with beating you and burning you then he will always do it. and most likely it will only get worse. it could even end up with him critically hurting you. perminant damage. also cheating is very wrong also.

[CdwJava]

Originally Posted by lilo342

my husband found out that i had an affair and beat me up for four days and burned me (3rd degree burns on several spots on my body) while he was beating me.

Sounds like a really lovely fellow ...

I finally managed to call the police and got him arrested but I bailed him out couple of hours later.

WHY?!?!

now ten days later we know that he will be charged with 244 and 273.5a I had a restraining order against him but it expired 3 days ago

No, what you had was an EPO (emergency protective order). You CAN (and SHOULD) go back to the courthouse and get a TRO (temporary restraining order).

He committed felony domestic violence and is charged with lighting you on fire after dousing you with a flammable or caustic substance (PC 244)! Next time, he might KILL you!

and he want me to go to a lawyer in the same office as the lawyer he is using is that legal?? he is pushing me to call and go and to do any thing to get him out of this mess? but not sure if this is legal I mean I'm the victim here not him we also have two kids 2 and 6 years old

Legal, sure ... but very stupid. YOU do not NEED a lawyer! Using an attorney in HIS defense counsel's office is dumb, dumb, dumb. HIS attorney has no interest in you and will make you out to be a lying, psycho woman if he has to in order to protect his client.

Get the TRO and talk to the DA about what he is trying to get you to do (because I don't know why he wants you to talk to a lawyer).

Also note that if you fail to go through with protecting yourself, I suspect it is a guarantee that CPS will get involved and will take your children away. if you refuse to protect yourself, then they will view this as your putting the children in extraordinary danger, and will very likely seize the children. So, you may have to choose - him, or the kids.

he is upset and want me to help him saying that it was my fault that all of this happened given that he is a well respected doctor in the community. Any thought or help would be appreciated
thanks

GET THE TRO ... contact the police and the DA and let them know what he is trying to do (we call it witness tampering) ... make sure you are in a safe place where he cannot get to you and the kids ... file for temporary custody of the children ... stay away from him ... oh, and get the TRO (yeah, I said it twice and I would say it more, too). Also, contact your local domestic violence shelter or help organization, AND the county's victim/witness assistance office - they can help with funds, court assistance, and other resources while you are in transition.

- Carl

[snowshuze]

<thud>

PLEASE seek counciling. YOU and your CHILDREN deserve better than this.



Edited to add: Would you have bailed him out so quickly if it had been your child whom he had set afire?