car vandalism

[joshua banks]

My girlfriend keyed my car and flattened two of my tires, What should I do?

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Choices: (Choose up to 3)

1. Spank her.

2. Have her finish off the other side and tires.

3. Buy new tires. Have car repainted.

4. Marry her. She "really" cares.

5. Put a curse on her entire family.

6. Tell her, "Wrong car - - that was a stand-in car !"

7. Key her car. Puncture her tires.

8. Key her. Puncture her feet.

9. She didn't do it. It was a "Dallas" dream.

10. Buy her her own car, and key it.

11. Kinky !!

12. Put Firestone tires on her car. Tell her to take the freeway at 80 miles per hour.

13. She was never your girlfriend.

14. You were never her boyfriend.

15. You would like her and her girlfriend to key you (if you know what I mean).

16. She didn't key your car. She keyed Guido's car. She now has a "contract" out on her.

17. Be understanding. This is what 14 year old girls do.

18. Start dating her mother.

19. Take the public transportation bus, and have her key that.

20. Bring her to a used car lot - - so she can hone her skills.

21. Sue her in Small Claims court.

IAAL