Tough love re: $

[letstalk]

What is the name of your state? Massachusetts, but this is about Canada.

I have two sisters. One is in a high corporate position in NY. The other lives in Ontario, has never worked, is married to a man who claims he cannot work for some disability reason and they have a 15 year old very angry daughter. My great aunt left a trust, from which we are all paid about $25K/year.

Canadian sister is not 'right' but refuses to get help of any kind, physically or mentally. She has made a career out of creating crises, and has always had a family member, first my now-deceased mom, and currently my NY sister, to bail her out. My mom left Canadian sister a paid-off house, valued at around $250K which 'sister' has started to borrow equity from, and bit by bit, the bank is starting to own it.

NY sister has been bailing Canadian sister out, but now wants me to help financially. I'm not enamored with this idea, dont' ahve a lot and want rules. So maybe tough love is the solution. Is there a way, we can stipulate that Canadian sisters power of attorney, be transferred to someone else up there, aka guardian, to authorize the flow of money. Canadian sister wants to sell the house and I'm in fear of how quickly she'll go through that amount of money. And then, they'd all be homeless as well as broke. It's very sad, but I have a life too.

[JETX]

You will have to talk with a Canadian attorney (solicitor) to get THEIR laws. This site is for US law only.

[VeronicaGia]

Technically, your last statement answers your question: You have a life too.

The more you give to people who refuse to help themselves, the more they will demand and expect. Don't put yourself through this. It's tough, but the fact is that people who won't at least try to help themselves don't deserve help.

[ConnorW]

letstalk -

I had to dig into my past, I grew up in Toronto. But, if I remember correctly you can have a Trust formed, put the proceeds from the sale of the of the house into the Trust and have someone in charge of the Trust. This could be a local solicitor or some other responsible party, any time your sister wanted to withdraw money from the Trust she would have to check with the Trustee.

Of course, the Trustee could set up electronic payments for the rent/mortgage and other monthly utilities.

As JETX said, the best thing to do is to check with a local solicitor, I moved to the US in 95, so anything I knew about Canadian and Ontario laws is WAY out of date.

Check out this website as a place to start, if I remember correctly it is the Ontario version of the State Bar. You could get referrals to an attorney who is local you your sister.

[url]http://www.lsuc.on.ca/[/url]