What is the name of your state? Indiana
What is the name of your state? Indiana
18. Until then, a judge decides.
Hi, I live in California and I want to go live with my dad in Texas. I'm 16, am I old enough to choose where I want to be?
its my decision to go live with him so yeah
Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.
Attorney-GAL in Ohio.
I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
Don't Give Children A Sophie's Choice
by Honorable Anne Kass. Ann Kass is a District Judge in the Second Judicial District State of New Mexico.
I sometimes say to divorcing parents, who are locked in a custody fight: Imagine that you have two children, and imagine the Court telling you that you can have only one of them. Imagine the Court telling you to pick one.
The parents usually look at me as though I were mad.
I then tell them about a movie I saw some years ago in which a mother was given that choice. It was World War II. She had been sent to a **** war camp. She had a small son and a small daughter. The **** soldiers said to her: "Pick one. Which one do you want?" The Mother said she could not choose between her children. The **** soldiers said if she didn't pick one, she would lose them both, so she picked one.
The name of the movie is "Sophie's Choice." It is about the life-long anguish that Sophie suffered from having to make a choice between her son and her daughter. The movie shows Sophie, after the war, as a rather aimless, nonproductive character and; an alcoholic.
I once thought that the movie was set in a **** war camp because no one, except a deranged ****, could possibly dream-up such a diabolical plot. But, that's not so. I see divorcing parents give their children Sophie's Choice every day.
When divorcing parents quarrel and struggle over their children or belittle one another in the children's presence, the message to the children is: Pick one of us. Which of your parents do you want?
Generally, the message is subtle. One parent puts on a long, sad face when the children leave to spend time with the other parent, or acts annoyed when the child reports having had a good time when with the other parent. Sometimes the message is blatant. Some parents actually ask the children, "which of us do you want to live with?"
Divorcing parents need to know that the most generous, the most loving gift each parent can give their children is his or her permission for the children to love the other parent and to accept love from the other parent. Many parents involved in custody disputes do not give their children that gift of permission. They give their children Sophie's Choice.
And the children who are faced with this choice often do as Sophie did--they self-destruct. They grow-up to be aimless, non-productive adults, with alcohol or drug problems, or worse. Theirs is the life-long anguish of being denied what should truly be an inalienable right--the right to love both parents
Why are we necroposting a FIVE year old thread?
I was told by my attorney in Indiana that my daughters could decide which parent they want to live with when they are 12
I was also told by my attorney, who has been practicing for 35 years, that if a child is very mature, articulate, and has a good grasp of their schedule, that a judge will listen. I haven't done it (my child is 8) but that is what her EXPERIENCE has been in unusual cases in court. Thats the deal isn't it? Most children would not even consider speaking up unless for some reason they were miserable at that parents house. This is outside of the parents who coach their children to not be happy with the other parent - I know they are common, and yet they give a super bad time for the kids who on their own are not able to cope with a parent.
What's out of line about it? For one thing, you don't give your state. If it doesn't match the OP's state -- and who IS the OP at this point? -- then it's pointless.
What else? That it GOES AGAINST the normal legal info given here. And you have NO legal citation for this -- because "a lawyer told" you. Where is that lawyer now? Not here, not standing up for the silliness he told you.