+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 21
  1. #1
    hondaex is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6

    Can a 13 year old make the custody choice?

    What is the name of your state? WAWhat is the name of your state? In other words, can a 13 year old make the definitive decision about where they will live regardless of parental input to the court in my state?
  2. #2
    toribella is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    18
    Quote Originally Posted by hondaex View Post
    What is the name of your state? WAWhat is the name of your state? In other words, can a 13 year old make the definitive decision about where they will live regardless of parental input to the court in my state?
    In Colorado the judge will listen to and take into account with which parent the minor would prefer to reside with at a certain age. (not sure of the exact age) You may want to check to see if that's possible, and if so, at what age in Wa.
  3. #3
    LdiJ is online now Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    66,084
    Quote Originally Posted by hondaex View Post
    What is the name of your state? WAWhat is the name of your state? In other words, can a 13 year old make the definitive decision about where they will live regardless of parental input to the court in my state?
    The only state that allows a child to make a definitive choice (at 14) is GA. However many other states will allow a child to express a preference, and the judge decides how much weight, if any, to give that preference. Get a consult with a local attorney to find out how much weight your local judges give to a child's preference.
  4. #4
    Blue Meanie is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    24,428
    Quote Originally Posted by toribella View Post
    In Colorado the judge will listen to and take into account with which parent the minor would prefer to reside with at a certain age. (not sure of the exact age) You may want to check to see if that's possible, and if so, at what age in Wa.
    Either look up the law for the specific state in question or don't bother posting. OP is not in CO, he/she is in WA. If s/he KNEW how to find out this information s/he would not have posted here.
  5. #5
    hondaex is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6
    I do know in WA, for example, that a parent can not place a 13 or older child into a residential treatment facility without the child's consent. I've been told the only guaranteed way to do that is to transfer guardianship to someone in another state with stronger parental laws, usually someone from the facility in question and often in Idaho. It seemed by extension to me that perhaps children in general could choose where they want to live here. My fiance's ex is threatening to take her children away. There is a decent chance they would choose to be with him. He showers them with money and video games, but there are many reasons this would be detrimental that we at least believe a reasonable judge would take into consideration.
  6. #6
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    52,825
    Quote Originally Posted by toribella View Post
    In Colorado the judge will listen to and take into account with which parent the minor would prefer to reside with at a certain age. (not sure of the exact age) You may want to check to see if that's possible, and if so, at what age in Wa.
    Tori, this OP is not in COlorado. Hence Colorado DOES NOT MATTER. Quit posting.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
  7. #7
    Bloopy is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Virginia
    Posts
    1,343
    Quote Originally Posted by hondaex View Post
    I've been told the only guaranteed way to do that is to transfer guardianship to someone in another state with stronger parental laws.
    This is called forum shopping and it is not tolerated by the courts for this very reason.

    If you don't like the answer Mommy give you, you may not go ask Daddy. Naughty, naughty.
  8. #8
    hondaex is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6
    I don't understand the posting by Bloopy. Is it some sort of cut against me, or my fiance as the parent, or is it merely a comment that the child can't just go to the parent willing to overlook serious problems affecting the child that the current custodial parent is trying to address in a way the child is not particularly excited about?
  9. #9
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Posts
    44,556
    Nope, the kid doesn't choose. IF the judge chooses to listen to the kid, "I want to live with X parent because s/he has no rules and gives me money" will not be a reason that impresses the judge.

    And please - do not listen to tori's advice - she is legally incorrect most of the time.
  10. #10
    Silverplum is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Castle Rock, CO
    Posts
    25,913
    Quote Originally Posted by toribella View Post
    In Colorado the judge will listen to and take into account with which parent the minor would prefer to reside with at a certain age. (not sure of the exact age) You may want to check to see if that's possible, and if so, at what age in Wa.
    These remarks? Not allowed.
    It's simply stupid -- each state is different, and if you can't be *bothered* to look up the correct answer, then sit back and read. Learn a little. It won't kill you.

    When you signed up here to GET advice, didn't you expect valid legal info?? Then why are you giving vague, crappy answers to other posters in need?

    Stop it. Now.
  11. #11
    frylover is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    1,252
    Quote Originally Posted by hondaex View Post
    I don't understand the posting by Bloopy. Is it some sort of cut against me, or my fiance as the parent, or is it merely a comment that the child can't just go to the parent willing to overlook serious problems affecting the child that the current custodial parent is trying to address in a way the child is not particularly excited about?


    From my reading here, I think what Bloopy is saying is that people can't "choose" a state whose custody laws they like better than the one that has jurisdiction and try to find a way to get that state to "take over"....like a kid shouldn't go ask Daddy for something if they don't like Mommy's answer.
  12. #12
    hondaex is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6
    The Idaho reference I made earlier actually has nothing to do with our situation and perhaps I shouldn't have made it. We happen to be in a parent support group of parents with troubled kids, 2 of whom have placed children in residencial treatment schools in Idaho. We live in WA, have no intention of sending our kids to a facility in any other state, and are merely trying to figure out what our legal situation is here where we live. The Idaho situations we were aware of is just what raised the question in our minds as to whether my fiance's children could make their own choice to leave her home for their father's home because they could get away from rules and do and get what they want and were old enough in our state to make that choice. We are comfortable presenting our case before a judge. We were worried if the judge was simply bound to accept the child's choice of where they would prefer to be.
  13. #13
    >Charlotte< is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    5,088
    RCW 26.10.120 states: The court may interview the child in chambers to ascertain the child's wishes as to his or her custodian and as to visitation privileges.

    May. As in, "is allowed to." Not will, not shall. May.

    RCW 26.10.100 states: The court shall determine custody in accordance with the best interests of the child.

    While 120 leaves much to the judge's discretion, this is a directive.
    Last edited by >Charlotte<; 03-24-2008 at 01:01 PM. Reason: Changed the RCW Title from 36 (typo) to 26
  14. #14
    OhReally? is offline Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    570
    Quote Originally Posted by toribella View Post
    In Colorado the judge will listen to and take into account with which parent the minor would prefer to reside with at a certain age. (not sure of the exact age) You may want to check to see if that's possible, and if so, at what age in Wa.
    And here's proof you don't know what in the hell you're talking about. You say one thing (which is DEAD FREAKING WRONG)...then you backpeddle and say "you may wanna check."

    Since you're clueless, you may wanna just shut the hell up. Actually, just do it.
  15. #15
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Posts
    44,556
    Quote Originally Posted by hondaex View Post
    The Idaho reference I made earlier actually has nothing to do with our situation and perhaps I shouldn't have made it. We happen to be in a parent support group of parents with troubled kids, 2 of whom have placed children in residencial treatment schools in Idaho. We live in WA, have no intention of sending our kids to a facility in any other state, and are merely trying to figure out what our legal situation is here where we live. The Idaho situations we were aware of is just what raised the question in our minds as to whether my fiance's children could make their own choice to leave her home for their father's home because they could get away from rules and do and get what they want and were old enough in our state to make that choice. We are comfortable presenting our case before a judge. We were worried if the judge was simply bound to accept the child's choice of where they would prefer to be.
    Here's a newsflash for you. "WE" have no legal situation. "WE" do not have a case. There are no "OUR" kids as far as her children from a previous relationship go. The only ones who have any of the above are your fiancee and her ex. You are.... no one. Sorry.

Similar Threads

  1. Custody Choice
    By CRsparky in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 09-26-2005, 05:41 AM
  2. Does a 12 Year Old have a visitation choice?
    By gibbs133 in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 07-26-2005, 04:34 PM
  3. 15 Year Old Girl: Choice Of Where To Live?
    By Sinjection in forum Juvenile Law
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 01-28-2005, 01:36 PM
  4. Does sixteen year old have choice?
    By berkleywood in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 05-28-2004, 12:45 PM
  5. Childs age to make choice of custody in VA
    By Sunris in forum Family Law Archive
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 10-02-2000, 07:18 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

© 1995-2012 Advice Company, All Rights Reserved

FreeAdvice® has been providing millions of consumers with outstanding advice, free, since 1995. While not a substitute for personal advice from a licensed professional, it is available AS IS, subject to our Disclaimer and Terms & Conditions Of Use.