What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma
I would like to thank anyone in advance who helps me out with the questions I have. I will try to keep it short but give all the necessary information.
I have a 12 y/o daughter who I have had full custody over all her life. Her father met her when she was about 8 months old (his choice not to meet her before that) He was in her life for approximately 3 months before he disappeared. It took (at the time I was in North Carolina) almost 9 years for NC to track him down for paternity testing (we were never married)
NC established paternity and she started receiving Social Security through him. I agreed on letting that be considered her child support. After the paternity had been established he still never tried to contact her. When she was 10 she asked me if I could help her find her father, that she wanted to know who he was. Did not take long for me to track him down on Myspace. I sent him a message and he replied and they talked on the phone for the first time.
A couple of months later he flew out to where I was living at the time to visit and meet her.. He brought his girlfriend with him (which I did not have a problem with this at the time). Him and his girlfriend were out there for about 5 days to visit with my daughter. The last 2 days she spent with mainly his girlfriend (I found this out later after they left) because he was "sick" and couldnt get out of bed.
Fast forward almost 2 years.. He has not seen her since that trip. He calls very seldom and when he does call he likes to talk about himself mainly (not an issue with me but she hates that he doesnt ask her about how she is doing) Anyhow, He texted me the other day asking if we could set up a predetermined custody schedule that he wanted me and his lawyer to sign. I do not feel comfortable with this. She does not want to be around his girlfriend because his girlfriend has called our daughter a "money hungry *bleep*" when she asked her dad for $30 one month. The girlfriend has also sent nasty emails to my daughter telling her that I am "brainwashing her".
Now he is threatening to take me to court to try to get joint custody. I am not one to just roll over at threats so I told him I would see him in court then. My question is this. How good are his chances? Would she have to be around the girlfriend if he got unsupervised visitations with her for a summer or holiday? He is on pain medications 24/7 and most of the time when he calls you can barely make sense out of what he is saying. He also admits that he sleeps a lot and states that while she is there his girlfriend will spend time with her and do things with her. would a judge allow that? I had a free consultation over the phone with a custody lawyer and he said something about Oklahoma has a "no cohabitating" law. that the girlfriend would have to leave the house while my daughter is there visiting if he was to get some kind of visitation. I can find nothing on this. does anyone know if this is true or if the attorney is just saying whatever to get hired?
sorry for this being so long.. thank you in advance. I will answer any questions that you may have. I have read through some of the threads and see how this works. Thanks.