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  1. #1
    Leticia Roman is offline Junior Member
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    Exclamation can I keep my daughter from going back to her father's if i feel its unsafe

    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? OHIO


    We share custody and I cannot let this happen to her anymore. What i mean is he's doing drugs and has my daughter in a terrible enviorment, I went to pick her up for my week with and and when i walked in there was trash everrrywwhhereee.Bottles, and cans of beer, wraps (used for rolling weed in) alll over the floor, on the matel, random ppl sleeping on the couch.You could barley walk around! Her father and girlfriend sleeping on the floor and he was passed out. He didnt even know i was there. Ive seen it like this a few times before but this was the worst by far. I know hes on probation and is violating it. I did let his officer know and she said she will probably test him. My daughter does not deserve this. She four years old and we(@ my home) have soo much to give her. I have a soon to be step child and their half baby brother here, and our lives our committed to our children. She deserves to have the commitment they have all the time available to her all the time too. I want to work on getting full custody because hes not changing and i'm actually scared to give her back for his week. i dont want to. Our custody agreement is that i have her for 1wk and he has her for 1 wk. When she starts school i will have her for the school year. I feel its not safe and absolutely not a good environment for her. So what can i do when he comes sunday to pick her up? The house is not like that all the time but i have seen it like like a couple times before. This last time(on sunday) was the worst. They were expecting me to come pick her up and had it like that so what is it like when i'm not there?! Can i keep her or what/can I do?
    Last edited by Leticia Roman; 01-13-2010 at 12:32 PM.
  2. #2
    Silverplum is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leticia Roman View Post
    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? OHIO


    We share custody and I cannot let this happen to her anymore. What i mean is he's doing drugs and has my daughter in a terrible enviorment, I went to pick her up for my week with and and when i walked in there was trash everrrywwhhereee.Bottles, and cans of beer, wraps (used for rolling weed in) alll over the floor, on the matel, random ppl sleeping on the couch.You could barley walk around! Her father and girlfriend sleeping on the floor and he was passed out. He didnt even know i was there. Ive seen it like this a few times before but this was the worst by far. I know hes on probation and is violating it. I did let his officer know and she said she will probably test him. My daughter does not deserve this. She four years old and we(@ my home) have soo much to give her. I have a soon to be step child and their half baby brother here, and our lives our committed to our children. She deserves to have the commitment they have all the time available to her all the time too. I want to work on getting full custody because hes not changing and i'm actually scared to give her back for his week. i dont want to. Our custody agreement is that i have her for 1wk and he has her for 1 wk. When she starts school i will have her for the school year. I feel its not safe and absolutely not a good environment for her. So what can i do when he comes sunday to pick her up? The house is not like that all the time but for the most part it can be. they were expecting me to come pick her up and had it like that so what is it like when i'm not there?! Can i keep her or what/can I do?
    You do have a court order for the custody agreement?
  3. #3
    Leticia Roman is offline Junior Member
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    yes we have a custody agreement. we went 3yrs ago, & made one through the courts. we did a mediation one. where we sat down with a someone and agreed on one
  4. #4
    ecmst12 is offline Senior Member
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    If you think she is not safe at his house, call CPS. Otherwise you would be in contempt if you refuse visitation. A court order is not a suggestion.
  5. #5
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leticia Roman View Post
    yes we have a custody agreement. we went 3yrs ago, & made one through the courts. we did a mediation one. where we sat down with a someone and agreed on one
    You get to follow the custody order. You can either call CPS or file for an emergency suspension of the court order. Until the court grants a change in the court order you are supposed to follow it.

    As for your soon to be stepchildren -- YOU are NOT their mother and never will be. Your soon to be hubby is NOT your child's father and will not be. Even if you have full custody, the child will visit with dad. You will not be able to ever prohibit visitation or control it completely. And also realize that if you wanted a stable person as your four year old's daughter -- well you should have chosen a stable person to have sex with and create the child with.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
  6. #6
    stepmom4ever is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ohiogal View Post
    You get to follow the custody order. You can either call CPS or file for an emergency suspension of the court order. Until the court grants a change in the court order you are supposed to follow it.

    As for your soon to be stepchildren -- YOU are NOT their mother and never will be. Your soon to be hubby is NOT your child's father and will not be. Even if you have full custody, the child will visit with dad. You will not be able to ever prohibit visitation or control it completely. And also realize that if you wanted a stable person as your four year old's daughter -- well you should have chosen a stable person to have sex with and create the child with.
    Oh boy OHIOGAL.....the child damn near need to be on his/her death bed before anything can be done... Some situation are bad for children to be around..geesh...everything is not always about following a court order...safety first! IN MY BOOK
  7. #7
    Antigone* is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by stepmom4ever View Post
    Oh boy OHIOGAL.....the child damn near need to be on his/her death bed before anything can be done... Some situation are bad for children to be around..geesh...everything is not always about following a court order...safety first! IN MY BOOK
    If is was so bad, the OP should have called CPS.

    Please,don't encourage the OP to read Stepmoms for Dummies.
  8. #8
    cyjeff is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by stepmom4ever View Post
    Oh boy OHIOGAL.....the child damn near need to be on his/her death bed before anything can be done... Some situation are bad for children to be around..geesh...everything is not always about following a court order...safety first! IN MY BOOK
    EVERYTHING is about following the court order.

    Failure to do so can lead to a host of issues up to and including losing custodial rights in favor of the person that you LEAST want to have custodial rights.

    If you want to win, you play by the rules.... if you need an emergency order, you get one from the court.

    If there are criminals and bongs around the little girl... CALL THE POLICE.

    Without proof of illegal/unsafe behavior, it doesn't count.

    Your book sucks.
  9. #9
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by stepmom4ever View Post
    Oh boy OHIOGAL.....the child damn near need to be on his/her death bed before anything can be done... Some situation are bad for children to be around..geesh...everything is not always about following a court order...safety first! IN MY BOOK
    Uh...honey?

    Go get some rest. You need it.

    Seriously - you're about three minutes away from "incoherent babble".
  10. #10
    stepmom4ever is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by cyjeff View Post
    EVERYTHING is about following the court order.

    Failure to do so can lead to a host of issues up to and including losing custodial rights in favor of the person that you LEAST want to have custodial rights.

    If you want to win, you play by the rules.... if you need an emergency order, you get one from the court.

    If there are criminals and bongs around the little girl... CALL THE POLICE.

    Without proof of illegal/unsafe behavior, it doesn't count.

    Your book sucks.
    whatever I'm done...
  11. #11
    cyjeff is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by stepmom4ever View Post
    whatever I'm done...
    Thank God for that.
  12. #12
    Antigone* is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by stepmom4ever View Post
    you're a dummy and dont ever disrespect me again by calling me names....I NEVER CALLED YOU A NAME...you idiot..there, now I just did
    I never called you a name. Also, respect is earned and you have not earned it; hence I have not disrespected you.
  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Proserpina View Post
    Uh...honey?

    Go get some rest. You need it.

    Seriously - you're about three minutes away from "incoherent babble".
    naptime! where do i sign up for one?
  14. #14
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by stepmom4ever View Post
    whatever I'm done...
    That's a really lovely sentiment to throw at the MANY people who have TRIED to help you in the past (oh - in case your memory isn't working too well, OG would be one of those people).

    Really lovely.

    Yeah, you're right. You're done here.
  15. #15
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by AGirlAndHerCrow View Post
    naptime! where do i sign up for one?
    It's in your court order

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