Can non-custodial parent take kids out of school?

[fujimama28]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Iowa

I am the custodial parent. The non-custodial parent wants to have the children miss a day of school without notifying me. Can he do this?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Iowa

I am the custodial parent. The non-custodial parent wants to have the children miss a day of school without notifying me. Can he do this?

It would appear that he's notified you of at least his intent....but what are the actual circumstances?

Do you have joint legal custody with Dad? What do your court orders say?

 

[ecmst12]

What is the reason they will be missing school and would it be during dad's parenting time?

 

[fujimama28]

We have joint legal custody but I have sole physical custody. He is getting married at 5:30 that afternoon. I suggested the kids go to class in the morning and have them leave early like at 11am.

Our papers were written 4 years ago. I was a student at that time and he had a different job at that time. We do not follow the papers exactly since we seem to be able to work everything out. Now we can't. He tends on pulling them from school during his visitation time written in the papers. I am not denying them time with him, but I would think he should have to notify me in the event he pulls them from school. He didn't actually tell me...the kids told me. When I asked him about it he said he didn't need to tell me nor have my permission.

 

[CJane]

We have joint legal custody but I have sole physical custody. He is getting married at 5:30 that afternoon. I suggested the kids go to class in the morning and have them leave early like at 11am.

Our papers were written 4 years ago. I was a student at that time and he had a different job at that time. We do not follow the papers exactly since we seem to be able to work everything out. Now we can't. He tends on pulling them from school during his visitation time written in the papers. I am not denying them time with him, but I would think he should have to notify me in the event he pulls them from school. He didn't actually tell me...the kids told me. When I asked him about it he said he didn't need to tell me nor have my permission.

So what time is his parenting time supposed to happen on that day? PER THE ORDER?

 

[InsaneJane]

The kids father is getting married that day. Get real.

 

[sometwo]

e have joint legal custody but I have sole physical custody. He is getting married at 5:30 that afternoon

We have taken stepson and daughter out of school for a week before ( and plan to next year also) to go to the beach.

 

[fujimama28]

Per the order it's every Thursday at 6pm to Friday at 6pm. Then every other weekend Friday 6pm to Sunday 6pm.

If he needs to pull them from school, so be it, I feel I should be informed.

I am not opposed to them going to the wedding. I do not agree with the total disregard to inform me.

He has been dating this woman for 7 months and as of today it's not even set in stone as to whether or not they are getting married. They will decide next week if it's going to take place.

If I don't pick this battle now, I fear this will continue to become a problem. I know if I didn't inform him of what's going on with the kids he would get upset. I notify him of EVERYTHING. It's pretty bad when I find this out from my 10-year-old. He doesn't even have the balls to let me know of the absence from school.

I congratulated him and gave him my best wishes. I honestly don't want to cause problems. I am looking out for the best interest of the kids. Isn't that what I am SUPPOSED to do?????

 

[CJane]

Per the order it's every Thursday at 6pm to Friday at 6pm. Then every other weekend Friday 6pm to Sunday 6pm.

And what day of the week is the wedding supposed to be? Friday?

If he needs to pull them from school, so be it, I feel I should be informed.

He still has plenty of opportunity to inform you. Perhaps he's waiting to determine if the wedding is actually taking place. Perhaps he has no intention of informing you. Either way, the world will not end.

I am not opposed to them going to the wedding. I do not agree with the total disregard to inform me.

And that's perfectly ok. There are probably lots of decision that he makes that you don't agree with. It's probably one reason you're not still together.

He has been dating this woman for 7 months and as of today it's not even set in stone as to whether or not they are getting married. They will decide next week if it's going to take place.

Great, then get upset NEXT week if you must.

If I don't pick this battle now, I fear this will continue to become a problem. I know if I didn't inform him of what's going on with the kids he would get upset. I notify him of EVERYTHING. It's pretty bad when I find this out from my 10-year-old. He doesn't even have the balls to let me know of the absence from school.

Again, unless he's ALREADY pulled them out and did not tell you in advance, you can't POSSIBLY KNOW whether he INTENDS to tell you or not.

I congratulated him and gave him my best wishes. I honestly don't want to cause problems. I am looking out for the best interest of the kids. Isn't that what I am SUPPOSED to do?????

How would the children be harmed by missing a day of school?

 

[fujimama28]

The kids father is getting married that day. Get real.

Never said they couldn't go!!!!!!

 

[fujimama28]

And what day of the week is the wedding supposed to be? Friday? Yes Friday



He still has plenty of opportunity to inform you. Perhaps he's waiting to determine if the wedding is actually taking place. Perhaps he has no intention of informing you. Either way, the world will not end. I know it won't end...but what about informing me??



And that's perfectly ok. There are probably lots of decision that he makes that you don't agree with. It's probably one reason you're not still together. Totally agree!!



Great, then get upset NEXT week if you must.



Again, unless he's ALREADY pulled them out and did not tell you in advance, you can't POSSIBLY KNOW whether he INTENDS to tell you or not.



How would the children be harmed by missing a day of school?

I just want to know if he has to notify me when he pulls the kids from school regardless of the reason.

I know it won't end...but what about informing me??

It is 2 weeks before school is out and we had 10 snow days and the teachers are still trying to play catch-up. So...basically...he can pull them out of school and not tell me as long as it's during his visitation time??? And I can do the same??? If this is the case we are in for some serious drama!!!

 

[wileybunch]

I just want to know if he has to notify me when he pulls the kids from school regardless of the reason.

I know it won't end...but what about informing me??

We're not talking about a myriad of hypothetical situations, we're talking about *a* situation and according to what you wrote, he HAS informed you. He's informed you enough so that you are quibbling over what time of day he should take them out of school:

We have joint legal custody but I have sole physical custody. He is getting married at 5:30 that afternoon. I suggested the kids go to class in the morning and have them leave early like at 11am.

It's his wedding day. Stop trying to control it.

 

[sometwo]

It is 2 weeks before school is out and we had 10 snow days and the teachers are still trying to play catch-up. So...basically...he can pull them out of school and not tell me as long as it's during his visitation time??? And I can do the same??? If this is the case we are in for some serious drama!!!

It seems to me your the only one currently creating the drama.

 

[fujimama28]

We're not talking about a myriad of hypothetical situations, we're talking about *a* situation and according to what you wrote, he HAS informed you. He's informed you enough so that you are quibbling over what time of day he should take them out of school:
It's his wedding day. Stop trying to control it.

He DIDN'T inform me. My son told me then I asked the dad about it. He said he did not need to tell me nor need my permission. It's not about the wedding, but about the communication.

Come on people!! Can he just pull them from school??????? No body seems to be answering that question!!!!!!!!! Everyone seems to be focusing on the wedding. I would NEVER pull them from school without informing him!!!!!!

 

[sometwo]

He DIDN'T inform me. My son told me then I asked the dad about it. He said he did not need to tell me nor need my permission. It's not about the wedding, but about the communication.

Come on people!! Can he just pull them from school??????? No body seems to be answering that question!!!!!!!!! Everyone seems to be focusing on the wedding. I would NEVER pull them from school without informing him!!!!!!

The point is it HASN'T happened. Your playing on what if's . We can play what if's day long but there's no point.

Most school policies won't stop a parent from pulling a child out UNLESS The court order specifies otherwise, especially in joint custody scenarios.