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kristymom

Guest
What is the name of your state? washington

This is more a request for general advice rather than legal.
I am a single mom who was never married to the father of our four children ages 10-14. He pays child support regularly through wage witholding and is currently around 10k in arrears, although that amount is slowly decreasing. We never had any legal custody agreement, I have always been the physical custodial parent. I have always encouraged, almost begged the father to be involved in his kids' lives but he was more interested in his own life. We have an amicable relationship.
Recently his feelings about family have changed and he is seeing more of our children. Four months ago after my 14 yr. old daughter and I had a large argument, she packed a bag and left for her dad's house across town. (He lives with his father.) Since she did that before and he sent her home after two weeks, I wasn't concerned. This time, he kept her until school was out and ever since she has been living with his girlfriend and their kids in the next town over. He still lives with his dad but spends the night at his girlfriend's house about 3 times a week. My daughter informed me he plans to move in with the gf but that has yet to happen.
He asked me to pay him support, which I refused. I offered to amend the child support order to be fair, which he declined. He wants custody but hasn't presented me with any legal papers which I wouldn't sign anyway. He knows I want my daughter back but she wants to stay there. (An atty. told me a judge would likely go with her wishes.) Last night she told me she wants to transfer to the school in that town. I would rather she stayed in her current school district and I'm getting tired of this arrangement. I have no problem with her living with her father, but I didn't agree to her living with his gf when he isn't actually living there himself.

I am wondering what rights I have, if any, concerning her schooling and her current living situation.
 


ellencee

Senior Member
Go get your child and bring her home. You have no court order giving the father custody or visitation, if I understood what you have said, which means you are the only one with any 'right' to the child.

You can't let a child leave home when there is an argument; you are teaching the child to run away from problems rather than resolve problems.

You can't let a child be the parent; and that is what you have done.

Go get your child and bring her home and be her parent.

Best wishes,
EC
 

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