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Character Reference letter/ questionnaire ?

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daisygirl

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona

Will character reference letters or questionnaires help my case?

1. - I have been stationed in Germany for 1 year now. I live in "American-military" housing with my husband who is a military police officer and 3 children

2. - Over the last 3 + years visitation has taken place at my place of residence, and my son would travel to the state I resided in (not AZ).

3. - I have not seen my son in over a year and my ex refuses to comply with the court ordered visitation allowing my son visit me.

4. - My ex has petitioned the court to only allow visitation in AZ and not in Germany. He also states that Germany is "unsafe". He would like me to travel back to the states to see our son for the ordered visitation. I have three kids that live with me, here in Germany, who really want to spend time with their brother too. I would not be able to afford the airfare to fly me and the kids back to the states, and stay in a hotel for a month, nor do I want to deny my kids the chance to visit with their brother. I want my son to have the opportunity to experience Europe and the culture over here.

5. - I have a huge support system here in Germany, and would like the court to be aware of it, but I’m unable to have any of these people testify in court about my living situation, parenting, community involvement etc.. because of the distance.

Would it be a good idea to have them write Character reference letters or fill out questionnaires (i.e.- school counselors, nurse, commander, neighbors, friends etc.) and submit them to the judge? :confused:
 


daisygirl

Junior Member
Current Court Order

My current court order is quite vague which I am now realizing.

It states that I will recieve 1/2 half of the Winter Break, Spring Break, Fall Break, every other Thanksgiving break, and 3 weeks in the summer...I can also visit my son in AZ where he resides with 14 days notice.

Unfortunately, the court order doesn't state where the visitation has to take place, it just states that those are the times I get. It doesn't state that the visitation has to take place in AZ, nor does it prevent it from taking place some where else.

However, for the last couple of years the visitation has been consistent. We alternate paying for the trips (flying..etc..), and the visitation has always been at my place of residence (always crossing state lines) with my husband and kids.

The court order states nothing in regards to traveling outside the country. I'm married to the military. I go where they want us to and when. I may be in Germany now, but in the next year I could be in Hawaii or anywhere. I can't continue to go back to court everytime I move...My ex can and will, go to court time after time because his family does have the money to waste.

I just want to do what it takes to spend quality time with my son, in my home, with his family (inc. sisters).
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
My current court order is quite vague which I am now realizing.

It states that I will recieve 1/2 half of the Winter Break, Spring Break, Fall Break, every other Thanksgiving break, and 3 weeks in the summer...I can also visit my son in AZ where he resides with 14 days notice.

Unfortunately, the court order doesn't state where the visitation has to take place, it just states that those are the times I get. It doesn't state that the visitation has to take place in AZ, nor does it prevent it from taking place some where else.

However, for the last couple of years the visitation has been consistent. We alternate paying for the trips (flying..etc..), and the visitation has always been at my place of residence (always crossing state lines) with my husband and kids.

The court order states nothing in regards to traveling outside the country. I'm married to the military. I go where they want us to and when. I may be in Germany now, but in the next year I could be in Hawaii or anywhere. I can't continue to go back to court everytime I move...My ex can and will, go to court time after time because his family does have the money to waste.

I just want to do what it takes to spend quality time with my son, in my home, with his family (inc. sisters).
A few things:
You are not "married TO the military." You're married to a military member. The military does NOT tell YOU to move. Your overdramatic rendering of this situation detracts from your credibility.

For that matter, your "newer" children are your son's HALF sisters. Again -- be factual and not overdramatic. Don't twist facts to suit your purpose: it's so easy to see and it detracts from your credibility.

You DO have to deal with the court EVERY time you move. That's the price you pay for having a court order. When your children age out, you can do as you please. Till then, you owe the court your attention as required.

YOU created the distance. YOU should be paying for ALL transportation. Consider yourself fantastically lucky that your X doesn't seem to realize that. Don't bring up expenses in court, unless you'd enjoy paying all of them.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
My current court order is quite vague which I am now realizing.

It states that I will recieve 1/2 half of the Winter Break, Spring Break, Fall Break, every other Thanksgiving break, and 3 weeks in the summer...I can also visit my son in AZ where he resides with 14 days notice.

Unfortunately, the court order doesn't state where the visitation has to take place, it just states that those are the times I get. It doesn't state that the visitation has to take place in AZ, nor does it prevent it from taking place some where else.

However, for the last couple of years the visitation has been consistent. We alternate paying for the trips (flying..etc..), and the visitation has always been at my place of residence (always crossing state lines) with my husband and kids.

The court order states nothing in regards to traveling outside the country. I'm married to the military. I go where they want us to and when. I may be in Germany now, but in the next year I could be in Hawaii or anywhere. I can't continue to go back to court everytime I move...My ex can and will, go to court time after time because his family does have the money to waste.

I just want to do what it takes to spend quality time with my son, in my home, with his family (inc. sisters).
If you want to enforce visitation for THIS summer, then you are going to need to hire an attorney to file an emergency motion to compel summer visitation since dad is denying you.

However, if your son doesn't already have a passport, you might have to forget about the whole thing, because I doubt there is time to get one.
 

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