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child doesn't want to visit

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confused45

Guest
What is the name of your state? florida

i have a daughter that will turn 12 in december that refuses to go for summer visitation to see her father. what can i do his attorney will not respond to mine to settle the problem. will i be in contempt if she doesn't go? my oldest child lives with him and has not came to visit me for the last two scheduled visits. does this matter when deciding?
 


imxoz

Member
Sounds like you both are in comtempt. Have you talked to him? I know this sounds like an old record on this forum but what would you do if she didn't want to go to school? Until the order is modified both of you would be in violation. Does he live far? Does your daughter see hin regularly?
 
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mrseld

Guest
Does she give you legitimate reasons as to why she doesn't want to go? Has your other child told you why she doesn't want to see you? What's going on?
 

I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
mrseld said:
Does she give you legitimate reasons as to why she doesn't want to go? Has your other child told you why she doesn't want to see you? What's going on?

My response:

"Legitimate reasons"?

Where the hell are you coming up with that? Show me ANY statute, from ANY state, that says a child can refuse to go on "visitation", per court orders, for a "legitimate reason."

There is none, do don't waste your time.

I don't care if that kid has two broken legs, and an arrow through her head. If the court order says the father gets her, then Momma Bear had damn well make sure that her daughter goes to the visitation.

Please, stop talking out of your ass, and use your brain, and moreso, USE THE GODDAMNED LAW!

IAAL
 
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confused45

Guest
i live in indiana and he lives in florida. she doesn't want to go because he spends no time with her at all while she is there. they have never had much of relationship at all. i have never pushed the issue of my son not coming here. i don't want either of us to be miserable. i miss him dearly and am waiting for him to see that. he just recently moved within the last year after being promised "boy toys" and no rules with his father. all of his grades dropped, skipping school, etc. none of this had ever happened until his move??
 

I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
confused45 said:
i live in indiana and he lives in florida. she doesn't want to go because he spends no time with her at all while she is there. they have never had much of relationship at all. i have never pushed the issue of my son not coming here. i don't want either of us to be miserable. i miss him dearly and am waiting for him to see that. he just recently moved within the last year after being promised "boy toys" and no rules with his father. all of his grades dropped, skipping school, etc. none of this had ever happened until his move??

My response:

You're headed for an Order of Contempt - which carries a fine and/or jail time, if you keep this up.

Never having much of a relationship is not a reason. If you keep her home, then not having a relationship is a sure bet, isn't it?

Your job is to place your daughter on a plane, kicking, screaming or crying - - but put her on that plane. You have a legal responsibility to follow the court orders, and it's not up to your daughter to make the rules.

Try using that excuse on a judge, and the last thing you're going to hear is the CLINK of jail bar door closing - - with you inside.

IAAL
 
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hexeliebe

Guest
Well guess what? I agree with the old pappa bear...

And for good reason. It's the law.

Too bad my grandmother isn't around anymore. She had a way with a hickory switch that would make anyone think twice about the words "I don't wanna..."
 
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confused45

Guest
in that case, shouldn't he be doing the same thing with my oldest child. he hasn't let me see him since last august?? why isn't he in jail for contempt??
 
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confused45

Guest
hexeliebe said:
Well guess what? I agree with the old pappa bear...

And for good reason. It's the law.

Too bad my grandmother isn't around anymore. She had a way with a hickory switch that would make anyone think twice about the words "I don't wanna..."

alot easier said than done. i thought we were to take care of our children not throw them to the wolves.
 
C

confused45

Guest
I AM ALWAYS LIABLE said:
My response:

You're headed for an Order of Contempt - which carries a fine and/or jail time, if you keep this up.

Never having much of a relationship is not a reason. If you keep her home, then not having a relationship is a sure bet, isn't it?

Your job is to place your daughter on a plane, kicking, screaming or crying - - but put her on that plane. You have a legal responsibility to follow the court orders, and it's not up to your daughter to make the rules.

Try using that excuse on a judge, and the last thing you're going to hear is the CLINK of jail bar door closing - - with you inside.

IAAL

shouldn't the law read both ways? why hasn't he been charged with contempt. i'm not in contempt yet her visit isn't scheduled until saturday. i have missed the last two visits with my oldest child
 
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hexeliebe

Guest
alot easier said than done. i thought we were to take care of our children not throw them to the wolves.
You are right. You're supposed to take care that they learn the difference between "I don't wanna" and the requirements of living in a civilized society with laws that protect ALL members of the society.

Your supposed to teach your children the difference between right and wrong and that just because she doesn't want to do something isn't a good enough reason not to do what is required of her.

and I could go on and on but IAAL will jump in because I'm about to lose it.
 

I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
confused45 said:
in that case, shouldn't he be doing the same thing with my oldest child. he hasn't let me see him since last august?? why isn't he in jail for contempt??

My response:

Because you're not enforcing your court order and your rights. All you're doing is sitting on your rights. If you don't file for an "Order to Show Cause Re: Contempt of Court", then no one is going to do it for you.

So, what this all boils down to is "if he isn't doing it, then I'm not going to do it."

Well, let's see who can get who into court first. Then we'll see who's going to get a huge fine, or a weekend in jail (for a first Contempt citation - - it goes up each time).

IAAL
 
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confused45

Guest
I AM ALWAYS LIABLE said:
My response:

Because you're not enforcing your court order and your rights. All you're doing is sitting on your rights. If you don't file for an "Order to Show Cause Re: Contempt of Court", then no one is going to do it for you.

So, what this all boils down to is "if he isn't doing it, then I'm not going to do it."

Well, let's see who can get who into court first. Then we'll see who's going to get a huge fine, or a weekend in jail (for a first Contempt citation - - it goes up each time).

IAAL
no that is not what it is boiling down to. i have sent all three of them for 7 years and now all of a sudden because he has one of them down there, he wants to change the rules. why can one child decide not to come and not the other one. is there an age limit as to when they do not have to go anymore?
 
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hexeliebe

Guest
Of course there is. It's called the age of emancipation.

Look in your support order. Your ex will be paying support until the age of 18 or until the child completes high school or college, depending on what the order says.

And that is when your child has a right to say I don't want to go.

Otherwise, you have been given LEGAL advice and correctly. Whether you choose to follow it or not is entirely up to you.

I hear visiting hours are quite liberal in your area. Maybe your children will tell Child Services "I don't want to go visit mommy in jail" also.
 
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confused45

Guest
hexeliebe said:
Of course there is. It's called the age of emancipation.

Look in your support order. Your ex will be paying support until the age of 18 or until the child completes high school or college, depending on what the order says.

And that is when your child has a right to say I don't want to go.

Otherwise, you have been given LEGAL advice and correctly. Whether you choose to follow it or not is entirely up to you.

I hear visiting hours are quite liberal in your area. Maybe your children will tell Child Services "I don't want to go visit mommy in jail" also.

i don't see any reason why you need to reply anymore. i asked for help and all you want to do is be a smart ass. thanks but no thanks. maybe i can introduce you to my ex. you would be perfect together!!
 

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