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Child Visitation - I need help, no clue where to go or what to do anymore.

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Dew

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? 3 states in question OR, WA, and AL

Hello all, I hope someone out there can lead me in the right direction. I cannot seem to find answers any place.

I live in Washington State also the child support was moved to Washington, the custody case is in Multnomah County, Oregon May of 2000. Mother and Child now reside in Alabama, no clue what city.
I am the not the primary parent, I have always fulfilled my support obligations the best I could (Was hit hard off the start with back support), my support is current has been since December 05.

I have not seen my son in 5 years, my visitation was every Saturday per the custody order. I have keep records of my visitations being denied, also have one filed King County police report. Was pointless to continue after calling them out there once they told me they cant enforce court ordered visitation.

My second to last attempt and getting my son for visitation was me showing up, hearing my son playing all cars home and no one answers. The following weekend I show up my son's grandmother answers the door and tells me they have moved and to not continue to show up at her home. My son was behind her at the time.
I never received a new address or phone number, and I never got a response via email from that point forward.

November 06 I received a notice in the mail from her saying she is moving to Alabama. I was given 14 days to react and the custody order states 30 days minimum. I sent an email requesting at least one last visit before they left. So both of my kids could meet each other at least once. I got no response. The reason for the relocation was due to her husband being in the military.
I still have no physical address other then a military FPO box, or any form of contact information besides her email address. I have sent an email about every 6 months or so over the 5 year span with no response. Not sure if I have every email I sent on these, I gave up.

I sent an email requesting some form of a response in regards to my sons future, I got a response for once from her husband with "I will never see him again, I am not his father, He is his father, do not contact them again, etc, etc,."

What I really need to know is what state do I file charges? contempt of court, parental interference, etc, etc,. I cant do this anymore, more so after the email response obviously they just want my money and me to stay out of the picture. I dont want to fund there lifes while I barley make it by each payday to keep food in my daughters belly. I cant just sit back and let this continue anymore. I need help desperately bad.
 
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You have not seen your son in 5 yrs. and you are just now going to do something about it. You should have hauled her but to court years ago. Waiting so long is going to make things a lot harder for you. I hope you intend to be consistent with visitation after this even if she is difficult. Good luck!
 

CJane

Senior Member
She informed you she was moving to the other end of the country and your only response was an email requesting one last visit?

And you sent an email every 6 months or so... and then gave up?

:rolleyes:

I honestly don't know what you could file that would effect any change at all. Honestly.
 

Dew

Junior Member
I couldnt deal with it anymore, I was fighting her in courts before he was born. Came to a point where I mentally couldnt handle going back to court to fight more. I couldnt pay for legal help so I had to do it all myself and keep my job. No matter what I did right, and she did wrong courts always sided with her.
 

Dew

Junior Member
per mutual agreement on the parenting plan communication was to be in form of email.
 

Dew

Junior Member
Miss wording on my part I tried keeping it short... At first I was emailing every week, then starting being every few weeks, then 6 months on average since. It was like dialing the same wrong number and expecting a new result.
 

CJane

Senior Member
per mutual agreement on the parenting plan communication was to be in form of email.
You should have filed in court to get a new parenting plan in place before the move. You likely wouldn't have been able to stop the move, since your visitation was only 4 days/month... but you could have gotten a plan in place that you might have been able to enforce.

How old is the child now?
 

Zephyr

Senior Member
so your son doesn't really know you, it's unfortunate that you didn't consult an attorney when you got the notification of the move. Go speak with a local family law attorney now, the fact that your son doesn't even know you could end up making this difficult, but yes you will need to file (in the county that issued the most recent order) for modification and have a new parenting plan that reflects the distance and a "re acquaintance" period, in which you would probably travel to your sons area to visit with him several times before it's possible for him to come to your home


do NOT get rid of that email that her idiot husband wrote

is there any way for you to afford an attorney?
 

Dew

Junior Member
Yes I can to an extent now, really limeted though. Last order? Parenting order, or child support? Or does it matter?
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Yes I can to an extent now, really limeted though. Last order? Parenting order, or child support? Or does it matter?
parenting order, because that is the parenting time that is being denied. If your order was in Oregon, and neither of you live in Oregon, expect to see that your X will try to get it moved to Alabama.

Your son has a right to know his FATHER.

As CJane stated, expect that they will put in a 'get to know each other' order. That should be followed with a long-distance plan. It appears that your X put the most distance into the separation. Request that she split transportation costs.
 
The FPO address you were given is most likely a base FPO, so any mail sent there is probably null and void. An FPO or APO is given to soldiers and sailors when they are transferring for a limited amount of time, unless they are deploying.

If you know the name of her husband you may be able to due a military locate, at the Base or online. It would help if you knew the branch of service her husband was in to make it easier on yourself.

You may also wish to look at readnotify.com and see how their system works with emails.
 

TheGeekess

Keeper of the Kraken
If the current husband is Army, he might be at Fort Rucker, (near Dothan), or possibly even serving in Georgia at the base in Columbus (but living in Bama). Might be Anniston, but I kind of doubt that, since the main base closed there a couple of years ago. Huntsville has the Redstone Arsenal, so that too is a possibility. If he's Air Force, there's a base in Montgomery.
 

Dew

Junior Member
He is in the army, I do know his name. How would I do a military locate?
Thanks for the readnotify website, thats good stuff!!!

Thank you everyone for the advice and information.
 

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