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  1. #1
    difficult3 is offline Member
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    Contempt in Missouri

    What is the name of your state? Missouri

    After three years it looks like my husband if finally going to have a parenting agreement. While ours is prettygood and detailed, there are still some holes that leave me concerned because his ex wife LOVES to use her husband's money to litigate Since we are in Pennsyvania, I'm worried that he'll get dragged to Missouri for contempt for stupid little things all the time.

    For instance, it says in the agreement that he has to give her notice of child care providers within 10 days. Unrealistic given all the different scenarios. Our lawyer told him it wasn't worth arguing this because it wasn't enforcable. Even if a judge would laugh her out of court, could he get dragged to Missouri for a hearing over this?

    For my own peace of mind I just want to know how easy it is to get dragged to court over contempt. It's my understanding that it's hard to prove contempt, but I'm more concerned over getting dragged to court because of the distance. Any advice?
  2. #2
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    Why would it be difficult to provide a list of child care providers w/in 10 days?
  3. #3
    difficult3 is offline Member
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    It won't always be difficult, but what about emergency situations or last minute changes? We are in PA and she is in Missouri and this would apply to summer visits. I'm just concerned about those extenuating circumstances that she would take advantage of. What parent ALWAYS knows 10 days in advance who will be caring for their kids?
  4. #4
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    For heaven's sake - provide her with a list of the people Dad would call when care is needed. Update as needed. Prioritize it, even. That will satisfy the requirement.
  5. #5
    weenor is offline Senior Member
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    There is no such thing as a perfect order and if she likes to litigate she will file...she can even make up stuff and file...and your hubby will have to defend. Now when she files for something respond by requesting attorneys' fees for your lawyer. Hopefully, that will shut her down.
  6. #6
    difficult3 is offline Member
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    I never said we wouldn't provide her names. We ALWAYS do the right thing. She is just the type of woman who would charge contempt if I ended up in the hospital and we had to get a child care provider last minute. A potential list IS NOT what she is asking for. She wants to know exactly who the children will be with 10 days in advance. You do not understand how impossible this woman will be. What if we cancelled daycare because we found out 5 days in advance his parents could come up and take care of the kids? These are the situations I'm worried about. YES, reasonable people should understand but she really IS that petty.
  7. #7
    difficult3 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by weenor
    There is no such thing as a perfect order and if she likes to litigate she will file...she can even make up stuff and file...and your hubby will have to defend. Now when she files for something respond by requesting attorneys' fees for your lawyer. Hopefully, that will shut her down.
    So what you're saying is she can drag him into Missouri court as much as she wants even if the judge will laugh her out of court?
  8. #8
    weenor is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by difficult3
    So what you're saying is she can drag him into Missouri court as much as she wants even if the judge will laugh her out of court?

    Absolutely.....but the kicker is that when files a frivolous motion or petition she will likely have to pay your attorneys' fees. Welcome to my world...my hubby's ex is on disability so when the judge awards his fees she is uncollectible. Hubby's attorney told him to start a rainy day lawyer fund.....I was mad at first when she said that, but after begging, borrowing, etc....to pay her to defend hubby, I see her point.
  9. #9
    difficult3 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by weenor
    Absolutely.....but the kicker is that when files a frivolous motion or petition she will likely have to pay your attorneys' fees. Welcome to my world...my hubby's ex is on disability so when the judge awards his fees she is uncollectible. Hubby's attorney told him to start a rainy day lawyer fund.....I was mad at first when she said that, but after begging, borrowing, etc....to pay her to defend hubby, I see her point.
    Thanks, that's what I wanted to know. I want to be mentally prepared. Would my husband have to appear in court for contempt if his lawyer will show? I'm so worried about the additonal travel costs. Any chance that would be awarded as well?

    Our support is in PA and she NEVER shows for hearings. I was wondering if it would work the same for custody as long as there is a lawyer present.
  10. #10
    weenor is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by difficult3
    Thanks, that's what I wanted to know. I want to be mentally prepared. Would my husband have to appear in court for contempt if his lawyer will show? I'm so worried about the additonal travel costs. Any chance that would be awarded as well?

    Our support is in PA and she NEVER shows for hearings. I was wondering if it would work the same for custody as long as there is a lawyer present.

    It depends on the type of contempt motion, the judge and the lawyer...we have had to go to go to the custody and contempt hearings...basically anything that would require testimony and evidence...Now if she files a really silly contempt motion with no evidence, hubby's lawyer can file a motion to dismiss and hubby's appearance will not be required at the hearing. If the judge were to deny the motion to dismiss and set a hearing then hubby would have to go.
  11. #11
    difficult3 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by weenor
    It depends on the type of contempt motion, the judge and the lawyer...we have had to go to go to the custody and contempt hearings...basically anything that would require testimony and evidence...Now if she files a really silly contempt motion with no evidence, hubby's lawyer can file a motion to dismiss and hubby's appearance will not be required at the hearing. If the judge were to deny the motion to dismiss and set a hearing then hubby would have to go.

    Sounds like GOOD times ahead!

    It's good advice. Thanks. Anything she will file would be frivolous because we're following this thing to the letter. The only thing that we would screw up on is extenuating circumstances.
  12. #12
    weenor is offline Senior Member
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    Wink

    Quote Originally Posted by difficult3
    Sounds like GOOD times ahead!

    It's good advice. Thanks. Anything she will file would be frivolous because we're following this thing to the letter. The only thing that we would screw up on is extenuating circumstances.

    Yep-my step daughter will be 13 in two months- I just keep telling myself 5 more years
  13. #13
    difficult3 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by weenor
    Yep-my step daughter will be 13 in two months- I just keep telling myself 5 more years
    Unfortunately, his youngest is 6. 12 more years is a lifetime and I'm scared it will be more if we move to a state that makes you pay for college.

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