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Couple of Questions -Is filing contempt worth it ? What happens ?

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mamadi

Member
What is the name of your state? North Carolina

My kids are in the middle (well beginning really) of their summer visitation with their mom in Buffalo. Mom had moved and had a change of telephone number and I had no idea. I continually called her home to speak to the kids only to hear a disconnected message. I had sent her their final report cards and they were sent back to me. I finally asked her about it and she said yes, she had moved and now living with her mother. So for the first few days they were gone I had assumed they were staying at one home while they were actually at another residence.
The first 4 days of their visit were literally hell on them. Mom (as well as grandma) picked / dug for any dirt she could get out of them.. We found out she is possibly moving back to NC so she is on a hunt for any trash she can bring into court eventually. They threatened my daughter because she calls my wife "MaMaDi". Grandma said to her "i'm telling your mother" after she told my wife she loved her on the telephone. My daughter was very nervous (still is to this day when we talk to on phone-- they listen to everything she says to us).

Anyway, here is just a sampling of what we've been faced with over the past week :

1) "The kids say Diane (my wife, a school teacher, who has been helping raise them for 5 years !) takes drugs. The kids told me she takes pills" (of course she does, Advil, Ginseng, etc).
2) "Timothy (my son) says he's scared of you"
3) "The kids say they've seen Mary (my step-daughter) almost having sex with her boyfriend" (my son saw them kissing in the livingroom and said they were "sexing" (it was actually a humorous moment -- but of course, she will turn it into something awful )
4) "Timothy said Diane slaps him around" (my son would never say that ! I think he's had one spanking in his life ! )

I could go on and on**************..
Bottom line is that mom uses the kids when she has them in her control over the summer. This is all a competition to her which is very sad ! She will do anything she can to turn them against us or to make it look like their lives are just awful (which is quite the contrary). And she uses the kids in her attempts !

What happens when one files a contempt order ? change of address with no notification,
Talking derogatory about the other parent in an effort to alienate their affection, exposure to smoke (cigarettes). All of the above are in the court order.

Is it worth it to file a contempt ? There was one filed already a couple of years ago and it seems as if nothing really came of it ! Should I file another ? What will eventually happen ?
I just want it to where my kids can enjoy their summer ( or any time with mom) without worrying what mom / grandma have to fill their heads with about dad / step-mom ! I told her she can go in the back room and bash us all she wants-- but please not in front of the children. We give her that courtesy so why can't she do the same ????

Tim
 


Noelle_71

Member
mamadi said:
What is the name of your state? North Carolina

My kids are in the middle (well beginning really) of their summer visitation with their mom in Buffalo. Mom had moved and had a change of telephone number and I had no idea. I continually called her home to speak to the kids only to hear a disconnected message. I had sent her their final report cards and they were sent back to me. I finally asked her about it and she said yes, she had moved and now living with her mother. So for the first few days they were gone I had assumed they were staying at one home while they were actually at another residence.
The first 4 days of their visit were literally hell on them. Mom (as well as grandma) picked / dug for any dirt she could get out of them.. We found out she is possibly moving back to NC so she is on a hunt for any trash she can bring into court eventually. They threatened my daughter because she calls my wife "MaMaDi". Grandma said to her "i'm telling your mother" after she told my wife she loved her on the telephone. My daughter was very nervous (still is to this day when we talk to on phone-- they listen to everything she says to us).
Further, my child has come home saying things all the time, but you have to take it with a grain of salt.

Anyway, here is just a sampling of what we've been faced with over the past week :

1) "The kids say Diane (my wife, a school teacher, who has been helping raise them for 5 years !) takes drugs. The kids told me she takes pills" (of course she does, Advil, Ginseng, etc).
2) "Timothy (my son) says he's scared of you"
3) "The kids say they've seen Mary (my step-daughter) almost having sex with her boyfriend" (my son saw them kissing in the livingroom and said they were "sexing" (it was actually a humorous moment -- but of course, she will turn it into something awful )
4) "Timothy said Diane slaps him around" (my son would never say that ! I think he's had one spanking in his life ! )

I could go on and on**************..
Bottom line is that mom uses the kids when she has them in her control over the summer. This is all a competition to her which is very sad ! She will do anything she can to turn them against us or to make it look like their lives are just awful (which is quite the contrary). And she uses the kids in her attempts !

What happens when one files a contempt order ? change of address with no notification,
Talking derogatory about the other parent in an effort to alienate their affection, exposure to smoke (cigarettes). All of the above are in the court order.

Is it worth it to file a contempt ? There was one filed already a couple of years ago and it seems as if nothing really came of it ! Should I file another ? What will eventually happen ?
I just want it to where my kids can enjoy their summer ( or any time with mom) without worrying what mom / grandma have to fill their heads with about dad / step-mom ! I told her she can go in the back room and bash us all she wants-- but please not in front of the children. We give her that courtesy so why can't she do the same ????

Tim
Welcome to the world of non-co parenting.
There isn't much you can do, you have very little to go on. You'll waste your money and your time trying to prove any of this.
As unfortunate as it is, smoking isn't a crime, Pal *could* be a used as a charge but you don't have a Pal issue here, yet. You could make a stink about the address, but the court is likely to do nothing. At least that is my experience. The issues that you are bringing up -other than the notification of address - aren't legal issues, they are issues that parents need to deal with outside of court and you'll probably be told that by the courts.
Good Luck.
 
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