Dad doesn't like Son calling Stepdad "Daddy"

[koronak2000]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? New York/Virginia. I just wanted to know if I have a son and the father wasn't a big part of his life while he was a toddler and I am now married and living in Virginia can a judge in New York insist that my son is not allowed to call his Stepdad "Daddy"? The real father is having a fit that my son calls someone else Daddy but his stepdad is more of a father then he ever was/is.

 

[Zephyr]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? New York/Virginia. I just wanted to know if I have a son and the father wasn't a big part of his life while he was a toddler and I am now married and living in Virginia can a judge in New York insist that my son is not allowed to call his Stepdad "Daddy"? The real father is having a fit that my son calls someone else Daddy but his stepdad is more of a father then he ever was/is.

Yes, he can

and dad should be upset about this

 

[casa]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? New York/Virginia. I just wanted to know if I have a son and the father wasn't a big part of his life while he was a toddler and I am now married and living in Virginia can a judge in New York insist that my son is not allowed to call his Stepdad "Daddy"? The real father is having a fit that my son calls someone else Daddy but his stepdad is more of a father then he ever was/is.

I ditto Zephyr. There are many instances when one parent (Mom OR Dad) aren't living in the home with the child- but that does not change their biology. An example is my oldest child's father is military stationed overseas~ He may not be 'around' but he is still her Daddy.

How would you feel if the Dad had custody and wanted son to call his wife "Mommy"?

You also state Dad wasn't a part of his life "while he was a toddler"...is Dad involved now? How old is the child?

 

[Zephyr]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? New York/Virginia. I just wanted to know if I have a son and the father wasn't a big part of his life while he was a toddler and I am now married and living in Virginia can a judge in New York insist that my son is not allowed to call his Stepdad "Daddy"? The real father is having a fit that my son calls someone else Daddy but his stepdad is more of a father then he ever was/is.

and this attitude is not supportive of a relationship between father and child, and not in your child's best interests

 

[stealth2]

This is a no-brainer. Help your kid figure out a different name to call his stepDad. Which is what you should have done in the first place.

 

[scaredandalone]

the stepparent is NOT mommy or daddy

but his stepdad is not daddy-and shouldnt be called as such. parents who insist that the stepparent be called mommy or daddy is way out of line.

 

[NotSoNew]

i can understand why dad would be upset over this!

 

[Nocgirl]

Legally there is not much that can be done in the courts but you should encourage your child to call the bio dad Daddy, and the step father something else, like his first name, papa, or something.

I am sure you would not like it if your ex remarried and then your child started calling her "mommy"?

turn the tables and see if you would like it.

 

[VA_Mom]

Just a question but - how old is the child now?

 

[koronak2000]

He is 6 and as soon as the dad and I broke up he wasn't in my son's life anymore. He would just come in and out and harass, stalk, and threaten me and the police would be involved and he actually had to go to jail in a few cases. I never forced my son to call his step dad "Daddy", he was just always viewed as the parent through my son's eyes. To make this VERY CLEAR it was never forced upon him EVER!!!! I understand everyone thinks their own opinions really matter to me but they don't because I just wanted to know the legal point on this. If you all would've been there through all the terrifying moments with him then maybe you would have a better understanding. But I do tell my son who his biological dad is and do say he is his father. Thanks for the answer that the courts can't do anything, that's all I wanted to know.

 

[stealth2]

Actually, the courts CAN do something. They can decide you're alienating the child from his father and change custody. But carry on.

 

[VA_Mom]

You're response and attitude to the situation is quite troubling. It does not matter what type of man he is - YOU LAID WITH HIM AND HAD A CHILD WITH HIM! It's not the child's fault that both of you are selfish but you have the responsibility of telling your child to call his stepfather an alternative name.

That information does not look good in court. Hopefully, the NCP will become more active and to prevent any further damage request the court to straighten out the matter.

 

[critterperson]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? New York/Virginia. I just wanted to know if I have a son and the father wasn't a big part of his life while he was a toddler and I am now married and living in Virginia can a judge in New York insist that my son is not allowed to call his Stepdad "Daddy"? The real father is having a fit that my son calls someone else Daddy but his stepdad is more of a father then he ever was/is.

I personally don't think there is anything wrong with calling the step parent DADDY or MOMMY....I think the only people that have a problem with it are the ones that have security issues...JMO... If I were you I would talk to an attorney in your area (I am in Illinois) and just ask the question....Is this person involved now (paying support ON TIME and visiting?) Both of my children call my husband daddy, and my ex wouldn't even try to stop it (I have a better attorney, and I could make his life a living he** ) Again talk to an attorney....Mine says not a problem if he wants to start something we will gladly finish it!

 

[BL]

You are basing your thoughts and wants on what the man did to YOU .

It has nothing to do with a father/child relationships .

It may not matter to you of our opinions , but legally DAD is DAD , and has a right to be a Father .

I have such a story , and believe me , for your child's sake do not interfere .

BTW , I do not believe the child was NOT enticed to call your new man DAD .

 

[Zephyr]

I personally don't think there is anything wrong with calling the step parent DADDY or MOMMY....I think the only people that have a problem with it are the ones that have security issues...JMO... If I were you I would talk to an attorney in your area (I am in Illinois) and just ask the question....Is this person involved now (paying support ON TIME and visiting?) Both of my children call my husband daddy, and my ex wouldn't even try to stop it (I have a better attorney, and I could make his life a living he** ) Again talk to an attorney....Mine says not a problem if he wants to start something we will gladly finish it!

there isn't a problem with it if the parent doesn't have a problem with it, and when it's accompanied by an attitude of the step is more of a parent than the bio, that is damaging to the parent child relationship, it's undermining.

and that's a nice co-parenting attitude to have