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dead beat dad out of prison...visitation

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needleme

Guest
What is the name of your state? SC

My son is 14 years old and doesn't want anything to do with his father.

His dad got visitation rights when son was 2 yrs old. Stopped seeing him in a few short months afterward. Father then went to prison for 5 years for breaking and entering and is listed on the sexual offenders list in SC. He was paroled and went back to jail in less than a year. While he was out, though, he convinced me and my husband that he was a "changed man" and wanted to rebuild a relationship with our son. During this time, he had my son (9 yrs old at the time) DRIVE HIS CAR WHILE HE (DAD) SMOKED CRACK ON A CRUSHED CAN IN THE PASSENGERS SEAT!!!! My son also witnessed his dad (actually caught in the act!) in an adulterous affair and begged him not to tell his wife. Then, his dad beat his PREGNANT wife so severely, he caused her to lose her spleen and almost killed her (doctors said 20 more minutes and she would have been dead). He went back to prison for another 5 years and was let out in Dec 2003.

We go to court April 29 for childsupport hearing and his dad has hinted to family and exwife that he wants visitation resumed.

What paperwork and such do I need to get together before court to try to have his rights altered/terminated, should the putts bring it up in court and the judge decided to hear him? My son is coming to court with me and will be glad to speak to the judge, if necessary.

Thanks so much.
 


Shay-Pari'e

Senior Member
needleme said:
What is the name of your state? SC

My son is 14 years old and doesn't want anything to do with his father.

His dad got visitation rights when son was 2 yrs old. Stopped seeing him in a few short months afterward. Father then went to prison for 5 years for breaking and entering and is listed on the sexual offenders list in SC. He was paroled and went back to jail in less than a year. While he was out, though, he convinced me and my husband that he was a "changed man" and wanted to rebuild a relationship with our son. During this time, he had my son (9 yrs old at the time) DRIVE HIS CAR WHILE HE (DAD) SMOKED CRACK ON A CRUSHED CAN IN THE PASSENGERS SEAT!!!! My son also witnessed his dad (actually caught in the act!) in an adulterous affair and begged him not to tell his wife. Then, his dad beat his PREGNANT wife so severely, he caused her to lose her spleen and almost killed her (doctors said 20 more minutes and she would have been dead). He went back to prison for another 5 years and was let out in Dec 2003.

We go to court April 29 for childsupport hearing and his dad has hinted to family and exwife that he wants visitation resumed.

What paperwork and such do I need to get together before court to try to have his rights altered/terminated, should the putts bring it up in court and the judge decided to hear him? My son is coming to court with me and will be glad to speak to the judge, if necessary.

Thanks so much.

Apparently you are taking him to court for child support now that he is out, and that is your right. as is his right to ask for visitation.

Under the circumstances that you have posted, I doubt he will get none other than supervised visitation at this point.

You do not need to knock yourself out digging up paperwork about his prison time,(You may not be entitled to it), simply state the facts to the judge. It will be the Judge who will see his record, and will rule according to that.

My opinion, your X will not get normal visitation if everything in your post is true. If he is a sexual affender as you stated, he must be supervised.

Get your son some counceling, for him to be dealing with his Bio dad this way, he must be pretty confused at this point.

Good Luck,
 
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stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Good Lord, woman - why on earth didn't you make a move to terminate his rights when he went back to prison 5 years ago? He can't be able to provide any significant amount of child support!
 
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needleme

Guest
I didn't know I could terminate his rights while he was in jail. Wish to God I knew that.

Will my sons wishes be honored as well? He really doesn't want to have anything to do with him. And his dad has been an insignificant part of his life so far. One of my sons complaints (and he has verbalized this to his father when he was 9 yrs old) is that his dad asks him to keep quiet about things he does that aren't right and trys to smooth talk my son into things, taking away his right to choose. He is manipulative and cunning, unfortunately. And very vindictive. He also steals from my son...money, possessions that can be sold for money or taken back to the store for a refund, etc.

I have worked so hard to steer my son in the right direction with school and socially. It just seems so stinkin' unfair that his bio-sperm-donor can walk back into his life and not just possibly, but probably screw up as much as he can.

Thanks for all the advice. Wish I had known I could get his rights terminated. I am so bummed that I didn't know that.
 
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K

krispenstpeter

Guest
SOUTH CAROLINA §§ 20-7-1572 20-7-763(C),(F)

Abandonment or Extreme Parental Disinterest
Abuse/Neglect
Mental Illness or Deficiency Alcohol- or Drug-induced Incapacity
Felony Conviction/ Incarceration
Failure of Reasonable Efforts
Sexual Abuse
Abuse/Neglect or Loss of Rights of Another Child
Failure to Maintain Contact
Failure to Provide Support
Failure to Establish Paternity
Child Judged in Need of Services/Dependent
Child's Best Interest
Child in care 15 of 22 months (or less)
Felony assault of child or sibling
Murder/Manslaughter of sibling child

Other Grounds
Presumptive father not the biological father
• Aggravated circumstances
• Conviction for domestic violence
 
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needleme

Guest
Thanks for the link. I also found it at http://www.scstatehouse.net/code/statmast.htm .

I went to the courthouse today to pick up all the previous orders concerning visitation. I found that the last order was a temporary order, giving son's father "supervised visitation" at his sisters house, since his mother was too ill to supervise. He was also giving a restraining order "enjoining him from consuming alcohol and/or drugs during the visitation period and/or around the minor child."

The sister has since become unable to properly supervise visits (she had 5 aneurysms on her brain and is childlike now). Son's father has violated the "no alcohol and drugs" stipulation time and time again. My son is willing to speak to the judge on what he had witnessed during visitation. Being 14 years old, I feel good about him being taken seriously by the judge.

Sigh! So I feel a little better now. I pray everything works out alright. Thanks for all your advice and help!
 

tigger22472

Senior Member
Well, there is part of your answer...
if the vistation can't be done as the court order says then HE has to go to court to change that before you have to let him see the child.
 

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