What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? HI
I have a stand alone question and since my previous topic is long (and locked), I hope it's OK to start a new one.
I have been reading a lot here and have learned a bit about what is and isn't OK for parents to do, but I'm confused about how much the court cares about new relationships formed prior to the divorce and the exposure of children to new boyfriends/girlfriends.
On one hand I hear that adults are free to form new relationships and the soon to be former spouse needs to get past that. On the other I've seen new stepmoms & dads/girl & boyfriends chastised for being present in the lives of children whose parents are still working things out.
What do the courts dislike and what do they think is ideal behavior?
Can anyone explain it to me?
In the situation I've posted about previously, my son and his wife have been physically separated for 8 1/2 months. She began dating after two months and very quickly had a new relationship. Within two-four months she had put the new BF as Dad on the school contact card.
Child refers to new BF as Daddy enough to show that he was taught this was the new family (real Dad is "papa-daddy" to him). He's quite confused at the moment.
Mom is apparently living in new BF's home and wants child to be there with them primarily (her current proposal).
Dad has not had a date since wife left, but is starting to think it would be nice to ask someone out. What would be the best way to handle it, with the child living in his household? Obviously the paramount thing is not to upset or confuse the child, and he would gauge that and stay far from the line, but what does the court think about these situations?
To sum up my question, in this time where people freely live together while unmarried and even while married to someone else, is there still a stigma to that behavior, or is it just whatever consenting adults want to do and the children learn to accept it? Are the rules different when the divorce is still pending than afterwards?
(I personally understand that people break up and move on, but I think it was ridiculous and wrong for Mom to teach her son to get attached to a man she had just met and to use the Dad word. My ex did that with my son and his stepmom, and I will never forget the feeling when I heard my son call another woman Mom, and that was almost 30 years ago. But right now I'm interested in how the Court looks at it.)