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  1. #1
    ladygrim786 is offline Junior Member
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    do they have to go if they don't want to ?

    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
    I have two girls ages 12 and 14 who go to there dad's house every other weekend for visitation. The divorce states every 1st 3rd and 5th weekend but we do every other. The girls have come to a time in there life were they don't wish to go every other weekend and if they don't I don't make them but there dad is telling they don't have a choice they have to go if he says they do. My question is do they legally have to go if they do not want to?
  2. #2
    Hisbabygirl77 is offline Senior Member
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    Yes legally they do and yes legally you must make them. Unless of course you would like to lose custody completely
  3. #3
    ecmst12 is offline Senior Member
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    Court orders are kind of important.
  4. #4
    AkersTile is offline Member
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    I believe it is a court ORDER not a court suggestion. By all means, if they don't want to go you don't have to make them. Please post back and let us know how the judge feels about it.
  5. #5
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by ladygrim786 View Post
    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
    I have two girls ages 12 and 14 who go to there dad's house every other weekend for visitation. The divorce states every 1st 3rd and 5th weekend but we do every other. The girls have come to a time in there life were they don't wish to go every other weekend and if they don't I don't make them but there dad is telling they don't have a choice they have to go if he says they do. My question is do they legally have to go if they do not want to?
    Dad is right.

    Out of interest is there any compelling reason why they don't want to go?
  6. #6
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    I suppose that when your darling girls don't wish to go to school, you don't make them do that, either. Right?
  7. #7
    michandil is offline Member
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    As the other posters have said, yes. They have to follow court orders, whether they want to or not. Everyone does.

    All personal opinion:
    From a parenting perspective and practical perspective, though, it might be that revising your schedule might be what you and your ex think would be best. Courts do allow modification of orders.

    In my own family, the schedule in the order had been designed for a 5 y.o. and 9 y.o. When the kids were 11 and 15, their activities had changed, their independence from us was greater, and the schedule just wasn't ideal for their growth any more.

    So, IF it's clear that tweeks would improve the schedule, while still making clear to the kids that the court order rules and the parents are still authorities, you might want to propose revision to dad and see what he says. If you come to an agreement, you can write it up, both sign it, and have it entered as a new court-ordered schedule. Only then would the kids would have a new schedule.

    It's natural for teens and pre-teens to question and test to just how much power they have, who they have power over, where lines are drawn, and how to properly and effectively assert themselves where they might have needs and desires. In my opinion, that's when the parenting really get challenging! There is a lot more to consider with teens, as they do become more independent (and should) but also have a tendency to think they have as much say as parents or other authorities, or are entitled to get what they want whenever they want it. Have teens is like being in the advanced course in parenting- so much more subtle and nuanced. And in my experience, the courts recognize that.

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