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does wife of ex have rights?

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krislild

Member
What is the name of your state?nm


My ex and i have settled our vistation issue out of court. My lawyer has a copy of our agreement which is that he gets to see her every other sunday for 2 hours. The people that are allowed to be there are his parents or mine (only one person )and myself. I am there because my daughter is going to be two and she does not know her father at all. Anyway he has been dating this girl for 5 months and he told me she is pregnant, they got married last week. He wants his wife to go to visits now. He has only seen his daughter 1 time and has cancelled 2 time. We started this agreement 3 weeks ago. His new wife i have never met in person but is very rude to me and does not like the fact that he has to see me 2 times a month. The only reason i believe she wants to go is to keep an eye on her husband, and to make things uncomfortable. Do I have to let her go to visits? If I denie her and he takes me to court would he win? I want my daughter to get use to her father before bringing a step mom into the picture. Please give me advice Thanks.
:confused:
 
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VeronicaGia

Senior Member
Is it court ordered that only specific people can be there? If so, send him a copy of your court order with that section highlighted.

Realize that eventually these 2 hour visits will end, the child will end up at his house and the new step-mom will be there too.
 

krislild

Member
there is no court order. I will not allow overnight visits at least not know he is an ex drug maker and user. THere are people that he used to sell and make drugs for that want him dead. I will not allow him to have her overnight because of that reason and that she does not know him. If he wants over night he can take me to court. There is not court order, not child support order he is not even on her bc.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
krislild said:
there is no court order. I will not allow overnight visits at least not know he is an ex drug maker and user. THere are people that he used to sell and make drugs for that want him dead. I will not allow him to have her overnight because of that reason and that she does not know him. If he wants over night he can take me to court. There is not court order, not child support order he is not even on her bc.
If there is no court order, he is not legally the father (not on the bc) and you only have a private agreement, then you are in control at this point. You have a moral obligation to stick to the private agreement, but that is as far as you are required to go. However, if you don't cooperate his wife is likely to push him into taking it to court, so you need to be prepared for that.
 

krislild

Member
Im aware that i might push them to go to court. But I have a feeling that his wife will not persuade him to go to court. She does not like this situation at all and would rather not deal with any of it. She is a very controling person, and would rather him not be around his family. She even gets mad when he talks to his mom, not that its my buisness but they are always fighting, and i think it is because of my daughter. Not to mention the fact that his mom does not like her and does not accept her or the pregnancy. His wife is also pissed that his mom and I have a very close relationship. I might agree to letting her see my daughter but I have to meet her first and talk to her, and she has to respect my wishes and my beliefs. If i would have to agree to her vistiing with my daughter, i would like it to not happen right away. I think my ex needs to spend one on one time with his daughter before bringing in another stranger.
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
To stop beating around the bush and to allay some of the wrong answers, the answer to your situation is simple.

Since the agreement is between you and your ex and in the hands of your attorney, simply file it and have the court approve it as part of the custody/visitation agreemtn.

At this point, it's nothing more than a contract made between two people which can be interpreted differently by any party who reads it. And as such, can be thrown out by any judge should you or he take it that far.
 

krislild

Member
This might come out as me being a wench but ill take that chance. I do not think my ex should have any rights to my daughter he has never been there for her and is scum (in my eyes). But my lawyer thinks this is the best way to handle the situation. I am not going to file anything with the courts. If my ex wants to purse more than ill let him do so. I dont trust him, i dont feel like my daughter would be safe with him unsupervised. That is why I finally agreed to setting up some kind of supervised visits. I will be blown away if he files for anything with the courts. He has a son who he never fought for.
 
First off it would probably be best if you had paternity established. Not saying anything about you but that way all is clear. And as a future step-parent. If their marriage works (either way) for the length of time they are together she is going to be a part of your childs' life. It is petty to keep her away, especially when you are supervising the visits. You child also has a step-brother/sister and needs to be able to have a relationship with him/her. Work out your anger issues somewhere other than when it comes to visitation. If your first concern was your child then you would jump at the oppurtunity to have more people in your childs' life to love your child. YOU are at the visitation what do you think is going to happen? What would her being there hurt?
 

krislild

Member
My ex has come in and out of our daughters life so much I dont want to see her get hurt again. My ex is a druggy, who knows crazy people who are very pissed at my ex for turning them in. I guess I will have to allow my ex's wife to be a part of my daughters life.
I will not allow overnight visitation because of his past. That is a danger to my daughter. I have lots of family who love my daughter on my side of the family and his. His parents watch my daughter 2 days out of the week. They love my daughter to death, and are also afraid of over night visits and of his wife.
His family has never met her and does not no nothing about the baby. This is just here say but i have been told by people who know my ex's wife and from what i hear she is just as bad as my ex.
Did i meantion that he kicked his last gf ass because she was pregnant. Just another reason why i dont trust him.
As for filing for a paternity test I am not going to do anything if he wants to then he can, and when that happens i will file for child support.
 

krislild

Member
TO ALWAYS LIABLE

Dont start barking down my back. I met his family and we dated for 1 1/2 it. He worked a normal job and did not give any hints toward his messed up life. It wasnt until i told him that i was preg. that he came 1/2 clean about his life. The rest i found out gradually. This guy wanted to raise our daughter in a drug infested house.
 

I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
krislild said:
My ex has come in and out of our daughters life so much I dont want to see her get hurt again. My ex is a druggy, who knows crazy people who are very pissed at my ex for turning them in. I guess I will have to allow my ex's wife to be a part of my daughters life.
I will not allow overnight visitation because of his past. That is a danger to my daughter. I have lots of family who love my daughter on my side of the family and his. His parents watch my daughter 2 days out of the week. They love my daughter to death, and are also afraid of over night visits and of his wife.
His family has never met her and does not no nothing about the baby. This is just here say but i have been told by people who know my ex's wife and from what i hear she is just as bad as my ex.
Did i meantion that he kicked his last gf ass because she was pregnant. Just another reason why i dont trust him.
As for filing for a paternity test I am not going to do anything if he wants to then he can, and when that happens i will file for child support.


My response:

And how does any of this make you any less of a "skank"?

You knew what he was like LONG before you gave birth - - and (I doubt this), if you didn't, then you SHOULD HAVE!



IAAL
 
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