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  1. #1
    Brian6363 is offline Junior Member
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    May 2009
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    Drug use and Denying Visitation if suspected

    State is Florida.

    My Daughter is 2 years old. When she was born she was addicted to
    Cocaine and Heroin. DCF in Florida was called by the hospital and the
    child was given to me as I was the father. Yes I have had a DNA test
    to prove it also. The mother also was positive for the same.

    It's been two years since that happened, the mother and I had a good
    on/off releationship and she did see the child. She did not complete her
    drug program as DCF asked.

    She has fileld for custody, however during depositions last week she
    admitted she was using, and has been using cocaine, herion and other drugs
    for 15 years and is just now she says she is seeking treatment and goes to
    a methadone clinic for help.

    She had 4 other children, DCF took 3 of them for drug use over the last
    10 years. The last child died at birth from Drug withdraw last year.

    I want the mother to have visits, and I still get along with her. She says
    she is clean (2 months), but is on methadone 120mg day, but she did
    methadone to get high in the past.

    I believe she is a good mom, but that is when she was not high and that
    was not often. I never asked for child support, and don't get it. I have an
    attorney and she has mixed feelings about this also. She says the mother
    needs to get off methadone first as it is just another drug adiction.

    I like my attorney, but feel sometimes she don't budge in giving my childs
    mother a chance but she insists it's in my best interest to do it this way
    and make the mother prove she is clean and not using methadone as the
    legal way to get high.

    Any ideas from those that have been there?
  2. #2
    Blue Meanie is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brian6363 View Post
    State is Florida.

    My Daughter is 2 years old. When she was born she was addicted to
    Cocaine and Heroin. DCF in Florida was called by the hospital and the
    child was given to me as I was the father. Yes I have had a DNA test
    to prove it also. The mother also was positive for the same.

    It's been two years since that happened, the mother and I had a good
    on/off releationship and she did see the child. She did not complete her
    drug program as DCF asked.

    She has fileld for custody, however during depositions last week she
    admitted she was using, and has been using cocaine, herion and other drugs
    for 15 years and is just now she says she is seeking treatment and goes to
    a methadone clinic for help.

    She had 4 other children, DCF took 3 of them for drug use over the last
    10 years. The last child died at birth from Drug withdraw last year.

    I want the mother to have visits, and I still get along with her. She says
    she is clean (2 months), but is on methadone 120mg day, but she did
    methadone to get high in the past.

    I believe she is a good mom, but that is when she was not high and that
    was not often. I never asked for child support, and don't get it. I have an
    attorney and she has mixed feelings about this also. She says the mother
    needs to get off methadone first as it is just another drug adiction.

    I like my attorney, but feel sometimes she don't budge in giving my childs
    mother a chance but she insists it's in my best interest to do it this way
    and make the mother prove she is clean and not using methadone as the
    legal way to get high.

    Any ideas from those that have been there?
    Are you kidding? She KILLED her baby! KILLED! Frankly this child would be better off in foster care.

    Damn!
  3. #3
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    I'm getting the oddest feeling that this isn't the entire story
  4. #4
    tornado88 is offline Member
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    Either that or this is really the mother posting. Does anyone else find it strange that Dad even knows the milligram dosage of the methadone mom is taking?
  5. #5
    Antigone* is offline Senior Member
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    Love your child more than you feel for her mother. I wouldn't leave my child alone with that woman for a second unless she had YEARS of being clean.
  6. #6
    DawnPlusTwo is offline Member
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    OP- I guess you are "lucky" that you were even offered the chance to parent your child, my (adopted) little brother's bio parents were BOTH stripped of their rights, when brother was born addicted. His bio dad happens to be my uncle, who was paternity tested, then stripped.

    Please do not mess up this opportunity to be a good parent to your child by allowing a drug addict around.

    I wholeheartedly agree with your attorney. Mom needs to prove she is clean.
    She is NOT a good mother. GOOD mothers do NOT have drug addicted newborns. Please recognize that now.
  7. #7
    Brian6363 is offline Junior Member
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    No it's not the whole story... But it's 100% true

    It would take pages to tell it all.. But what is written is the basics..

    1) Mother of my daughter has had (4) other children. (3) were taken by
    Florida DCF before we met.. (I have records) My daughter was born 2
    years ago.. We did not live together but I was there when she was
    born.. DCF verified my home and Drug free before they gave her to me.

    2) Mother is upset she really has no rights. However I NEVER denied her
    one visit.. However I NEVER let her out of my site with her!

    3) The last child born dead 6 months ago could have been mine but because
    we were not married I had no say in anything.. She had baby cremated
    after born 3 days later and blood work showed baby had Heroin in system.

    I love this child more then anything and I WILL do my best to raise her in
    the best conditions I can provide. Thank God I have parents that love me
    and in time she will see how loved she really is.

    Blue Meanie

    Florida did not see it as she killed her last child. Due to the child being
    cremated they could do nothing. I may have been the father, I'll never know
    but I do know and she admits she was on drugs the whole time she carried
    this child.

    Dogmatique

    It's not, the whole story, but I did not want to write a book here!
    But what I did say was 100% accurate.. I left out the following...

    The Judge ordered her to be drug tested and present this test to
    me before any visit. She has not once passed a drug test and is upset
    I have not allowed the visits. Her Positive Opiate and Methadone test
    is just that. But her attorney says that should not prevent visitation
    at all.. My attorney says it does..

    tornado88

    In her deposition she stated she received 120mg of methadone a day..
    Yes my attorney asked her and that is the answer she gave..

    What I did not say was she also admitted in the deposition she has used
    methadone to get high in the past. But not being a drug user myself all I
    can find on the internet is things saying you can't get high on methadone.

    Wirelessany1

    Thanks.. She is seeking custody because I have not let her have the child
    alone for any visit. She want's the child for a whole week, and the court
    agreed on that.. But she has to provide a "Drug screening" showing no
    positives before this is allowd.

    Believe me, I LOVE this child and would die for her. I want the mother to
    have a relationship, and I wish she was drug free so she could spend more
    time with her wonderful daughter.

    Thanks for the replies.. And I AM THE FATHER... I do have a good attorney
    but wanted to learn more about what others go through and maybe, just
    maybe I'll learn something that I don't know and it will help.

    If there is a log on what posts I have seen, you will see I have looked at
    over 200 posts and learned alot just from them. I want to be proactive and
    not just do what my attorney says, but give her ideas she may not know
    of that may work without denying the mother her visits.

    Just my 2 cents.. Now I have to go change a diaper as I don't let my
    daughter sleep all night in a wet diaper... Some laugh at it but would you
    want to sleep in a wet diaper all night?
  8. #8
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
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    Ohio
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    If you love you child -- you don't let your child go to someone against court orders who is testing positive for drugs. If you love your child, you wouldn't be siding with druag addicted proof positive mom who is most likely responsible for the death of one of her children and has had three children removed.

    If you decide to side with mom and "agree" that mom should have visits, the court should immediately remove your child from you.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
  9. #9
    janM is offline Member
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    May 2001
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    553
    I'm confused. First you say:

    However I NEVER denied her
    one visit.. However I NEVER let her out of my site with her!
    Then you say:

    She has not once passed a drug test and is upset
    I have not allowed the visits.
    Which is it? Please say the second....

    ETA:
    If there are COURT ORDERS that she is not to have visits following a dirty test, then she DOES NOT HAVE VISITS. If you don't follow the orders, YOU COULD LOSE THIS CHILD.
  10. #10
    CJane is offline Senior Member
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    But if he doesn't let Mommy VISIT then he probably won't be allowed to schtup Mommy and create MORE crack babies.
  11. #11
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by CJane View Post
    But if he doesn't let Mommy VISIT then he probably won't be allowed to schtup Mommy and create MORE crack babies.
    That has to be the funniest - and yet most probably (and tragically) accurate - thing I've read all morning.

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