Emergency Custody Questions

[deew313]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

Hi, I share custody of my son with his Father, who is now married and has two additional children. A worker from the Department of Human Services came to my house to inform me that my son, and the Father's other children, have been removed from the Father's home. My son, during his Father's visitation periods, is staying at his paternal Grandfather's home. My son's Father is allowed supervised visitation, which is supervised by the Grandfather. I have attempted to find information on the case, but have been told that it involves one of the other children, so I am not entitled to any information. The Department of Human Services seems very intent on having me sign papers stating that I know of the situation and that my son, during his Father's visitation, will be staying with his Grandfather.

I do not see how the father's visitation periods could be transferred to the Grandfather. The only answers that I can get from DHS are that the Father is entitled to the visitation per our custody agreement (which is true, but seems irrelevant in this situation) and that the Father must agree to the person who is supervising visitation. I spoke with the father and offered to supervise visitation myself, but that offer was denied.

I am very uncomfortable with many aspects of this situation. First, why would the Father's visitation be transferred to the Grandfather in this situation? Second, without knowing why the children have been removed from the home, it is difficult to know what the right course of action is regarding to my son. Last, is this reason for me to file for emergency custody?

Here are a few additional details. A little over a year ago, there was an amber alert issued for one of the Father's other children. It was admitted tat that point that the Father had tracked down his wife, who had left him at the time, and slashed her tires when she pulled over. There have also been restraining orders issued against the Grandfather from both the Father and his wife.

I do not currently have the money that would be required to hire an attorney, but I feel like something should be done. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[single317dad]

Please clarify a few things, because I'm not finding this information easily in your post:

- Please describe the living arrangement of the child. How often does he live with you, how often with Dad, and where does he live on Dad's time.

- How does that living arrangement compare to the court order in place regarding custody and visitation?

- Where is the child now?

- You state that the grandfather is to supervise Dad's visitation, yet Dad has at some point had a restraining order against (that same?) grandfather. Please describe Dad's time with the child in that situation.

My initial impression is that Dad's time cannot be "transferred" unilaterally by DHS to the grandfather, but more information is needed to make that determination. I would recommend you tread very carefully in any cooperation with DHS, and take everything they tell you with a grain of salt.

 

[deew313]

Thank you for your response.

During the school year, the child lives with me the majority of the time, with the Father receiving visitation every other weekend and on some holidays. The arrangement is reversed in the summer.

The living arrangement, up until now, has gone exactly as the court order.

The child is with me now. He is scheduled to go to his Father's after school tomorrow. With the way things have been explained to me, my son will be going to his Grandfather's for the weekend, with the Grandfather bringing him to his Father at some unspecified point for supervised visitation.

Any answer I give regarding the Father's time with his son during the time when he had a restraining order against the Grandfather would be a guess. This was prior to the current situation and has been resolved.

 

[LdiJ]

Thank you for your response.

During the school year, the child lives with me the majority of the time, with the Father receiving visitation every other weekend and on some holidays. The arrangement is reversed in the summer.

The living arrangement, up until now, has gone exactly as the court order.

The child is with me now. He is scheduled to go to his Father's after school tomorrow. With the way things have been explained to me, my son will be going to his Grandfather's for the weekend, with the Grandfather bringing him to his Father at some unspecified point for supervised visitation.

Any answer I give regarding the Father's time with his son during the time when he had a restraining order against the Grandfather would be a guess. This was prior to the current situation and has been resolved.

I certainly understand your concerns. However, I think that DHS would argue that they have not transferred dad's parenting time to Grandfather, but rather have made him the supervisor of dad's time and that is why the child must be at grandpa's house. Its also probably safer for your child at this point. Odds are that the DHS situation will be resolved before summer, one way or another.

This would not be considered to be an emergency. However, you could file to modify custody and parenting time based on the circumstances, and ask that the child stay with you and you supervise dad's time. Generally though, grandparents are preferred supervisors in situations like this one.

 

[single317dad]

I believe I misread part of the original post. I was under the impression that supervision of Dad's visitation by the grandfather was already in place prior to the recent incident. It appears that this supervision is actually something put in place by DHS in response to that incident.

DHS does not have the authority, without court orders, to force the changes you've described. They can put plans in place 'til the cows come home, but cooperation with those plans is voluntary unless a court orders otherwise. DHS would not have court orders giving them power over your child unless you had been summoned to court in the process.

The flip side of that is that it may be in all or some parties' best interest to cooperate with the DHS plan in order to avoid the courtroom and resolve the issue. Simply sending the child to his grandfather's for a few weekends may allow Dad to resolve his issues and get DHS out of the picture (though from your description it sounds like his issues may run deeper than that).

Just know that any cooperation you provide is voluntary until/unless there is a court order compelling you. Statements you make and actions you take now could be introduced by DHS in any future court action. If you feel confused or taken advantage of, it's time to find a lawyer.

My attitude with child protection agencies is "friendly but firm opposition". I do not recommend that attitude for everyone. Others here will counsel you differently on the matter.